of stone railings and brick walls
Dawn found herself out on the balcony, fingers curled around the stone railing. The night was chilly, but it was beautiful. From where she stood, she could look down over the valley below her and admire it. Kanto sprawled to her left, and just beyond the intimidating peaks of Mount Silver to the right, was Johto.
The ceremony had been lovely, but stuffy. He had a lot of friends and the whole building had been packed and practically overflowing. No one had really been surprised when it happened. If anything, they had all just been waiting for the day when it would happen. When it came, some said it was too soon, some said it was about time. Dawn didn't really know where she stood.
Her own dreams were accomplished. She'd won her own title of Top Coordinator in her fourth season. Between her first and second, she'd taken a year off, but her comeback year in Hoenn was rather satisfying. Losing there was hard, but she had moved on. From Hoenn she went to Kanto. With another Grand Festival loss under her belt, she had been frustrated. The regions she had traveled were beautiful, but they were not Sinnoh.
Thus, Dawn returned to Sinnoh. She fought hard and she won. All of her long time rivals were elsewhere so she really was the favourite to win. It felt incredibly satisfying, but also fairly confusing. Her whole life revolved around becoming a Top Coordinator, and now that she was one, her life had been going in circles. Two years of endless circles.
She imagined that her friend might soon feel something along those lines. Right now, he was on cloud nine. He had won the Pokémon League, beaten the Elite Four and beaten the Champion. He deserved to feel proud. Although, he may never feel what Dawn felt because his heart was always a little brighter and a little tougher than other people's were.
Dawn still remembered the elation that came with his final victory. She and many mutual friends had been seated together and they had practically exploded at the end of the match. One friend of his in particular had been extremely excited and proud. She had been introduced as Misty Waterflower, Gym Leader of Cerulean City. Dawn hadn't thought much of her until tonight. Clearly, what they shared was not something that Dawn would be a part of.
It was a little childish, but it still stung. She figured, having not traveled with him in close to six years that she would be over it, but there was a nagging part of her heart that never let go. She thought it was nothing, but the way her chest ached tonight when he finally proclaimed his love and the Gym Leader practically tackled him, was not nothing.
If anything, she was slightly reassured by the looks exchanged after. May, another Top Coordinator, mutual friend, and friendly rival, cast him a lingering glance that Dawn did not let by unnoticed. The Hoenn coordinator was quickly distracted by her green-haired fiancé and Dawn knew that she at least had moved on. Drew, May's fiancé, had seen the glance but hadn't thought much about it.
He was not the first of their generation to become Champion, and he had powerful friends. Iris, the girl Dawn had met on her visits to Unova who was also the Unova Champion, sent him a look too. Dawn almost wondered whether the Unova Champion still thought about him that way before Cilan, the other Unovan friend, approached and touched Iris' elbow in a very personal way.
The last young woman to send a glance in his direction was his Kalosian friend. While Dawn hadn't met her personally, she knew that her name was Serena. The girl had cast the most longing glance in his direction and Dawn knew she definitely wasn't over it. She had half a mind to approach her so they could bond over mutual heartache, but instead had opted for fresh air.
Her knuckles tightened on the polished banister and she sighed. Her dress was delicate and certainly not warm. The sleeveless style did her no favours in the late summer night. Her hair, once in an elegant updo, was falling out, piece by piece. The balls of her feet were sore from her shoes. Despite being a PokéStylist, Dawn still didn't enjoy wearing heels for long periods of time.
The solitude of the balcony was a welcome change. She knew he made friends easily through their time together, but she had under estimated just how many friends he really had. But, she understood. There was something electrifying about Ash Ketchum and his Pikachu. Dawn honestly didn't know whether she loved him or she admired him.
She let out a sigh. It wasn't really worth dwelling on. He loved Misty and every part of Dawn knew that would never change. If she headed back inside she could easily be swept into a dance by a handsome stranger and use it to forget about everything. But, she mused idly, forgetting everything was a temporary solution. So she remained rooted at the railing of the balcony, looking out over two regions that were not her own.
"If you stand there any longer, someone might think you're tempted to jump," a voice cut in.
Dawn turned and found her visitor. He looked much the same he did years ago, but older and almost more exhausted. His hands were in the pockets of his dress pants and his tie was loosened a little. His dark hair fell around his face and his eyes were still as sharp and dark as ever.
"Come on Paul, you know I'd never do it." She reprimanded him softy, turning back to the view.
Ash's old rival stepped forwards so they stood next to each other. "I do, but someone else could get the wrong idea."
Dawn glanced over her shoulder. "Everyone is inside where they should be."
"And you're here," he reminded her, gruffly.
Dawn wasn't quite sure when she gained such civility with Paul, but it may have been two years ago. At the Grand Festival in which she was victorious, they had met again. He had been training with Cynthia and came to the festival as her guest out of curiosity. Closing ceremonies after the festival had left them in a similar place. His congratulations to her had been curt, but appreciated. She had even managed to rope him into a dance with her.
When Cynthia had announced that she would be stepping down as Champion of Sinnoh, it took Dawn all of two seconds to realize who would be replacing her. At his ascension ceremony, they'd also had a run in. It had been similar: curt, yet genuine words and Dawn roping him into one dance. But, that was all: one dance. They hadn't spoken since, yet they still settled into an almost comfortable silence here.
"What are you doing here Paul?" Dawn asked finally.
"It would be extremely rude if the Champion of Sinnoh didn't come to Ash's inauguration." Paul replied dryly.
Dawn sighed. "That's not what I meant, but okay. You could barely stand being at your own ceremony. If you paid your respects to Ash I'm sure you could have left. I meant, why are you here with me?"
"What gives you the assumption I'm here for you? What if I was just craving fresh air?"
"Then you would have picked an empty balcony and the Indigo Plateau has no shortages of them. Just quit dodging the question." She snapped in reply.
Paul didn't reply for a moment and Dawn's blue eyes flicked over to him. "I suppose," he mumbled, "it's for a reason that doesn't make very much sense."
"I know all about nonsensical reasons. I bet it isn't any more stupid that why I'm here." She replied softly. She curled her arms around herself and drummed her fingers against her arm idly.
"He did it the right way." Paul said unexpectedly. Dawn studied his expression. It was unreadable, so she stayed quiet and let him explain. "Iris and I ascended to Champion by the selection of the previous Champion. This does not mean we're not worthy, but it plants a seed of doubt. People begin to doubt the intentions of the League. If they're appointing Champions, who's to say they would even let a worthy trainer become Champion. That's always what it has been about. Trainers grow up, they get strong, they challenge the League, and they become Champion. That's how it works, but with the appointment of Champions, people doubt themselves."
Paul paused, almost like he didn't want to continue. His hands curled around the railing, white-knuckled, like Dawn's had before he arrived. She stopped drumming her fingers against her arms and tentatively brushed her hand over his own. The tension coiled in his shoulders relaxed a fraction, and his knuckles regained colour.
"Ash did it right. He won the League and he beat the Elite Four. He challenged and defeated Lance. He's worthy of his title and revered." Paul finished a little sourly.
"And you think you are not worthy?" Dawn asked.
"I don't know," he admitted. Dawn blinked. It took a lot out of his pride to admit he didn't know. "All I can say is that there is something I admire about Ash Ketchum."
Dawn hummed softly. "I think everyone can agree to that. He's a rather remarkable guy."
She leaned against the railing, bare forearms pressed again stone, and exhaled slowly. Now it was Paul's turn to watch her. She didn't look at him, but she could practically feel his gaze. A gust of wind blew by and rustled the fabric of Dawn's dress. Goosebumps coated her arms in reflex and she twisted uncomfortably.
"Dawn," Paul muttered, "you're cold. You should go back inside."
"I don't want to."
"You won't," he sighed.
"I can't," she corrected half-heartedly. "I guess I don't expect you to understand the reason why."
There was a long silence before Paul spoke again, voice coarse. "You're hurting because of him, because of him and the red headed Gym Leader." She glanced at him. He returned her gaze as if daring her to argue otherwise.
She just let out a soft breath. "I guess so," she murmured. "Ash was, is, so unique. He has a way of bringing people together that I don't quite understand. He brings out the best and the worst in people. I guess after spending so much time with him, it felt natural for me."
"You weren't," he frowned. "No, you aren't," he corrected, "the only one to feel that way."
Dawn's lips curled into a small frown. "No, I'm not. It's like a mark he leaves behind on each of us. It's not overwhelmingly strong, but there's a part of me that will always have it. May and Iris are proof of that."
"You left a mark on him too you know. Maybe not in the way you wanted or expected, but you're irreplaceable to him."
Dawn almost smiled. "I never expected you to be so insightful on this kind of thing Paul," she teased.
He frowned and looked pointedly in a different direction. "Don't get used to it," he grumbled.
They stood in silence again for a moment. Music poured out from the cracks of the doors leading back inside. Another gust of wind blew through and tugged another strand of hair loose. She wanted to go back inside, but at the same time, she hadn't felt this clear on anything in her life since she won the Grand Festival.
"What's it like?" She asked. Paul glanced at her again. "Being Champion," she clarified as an afterthought.
"Not what I expected." He replied. She knew he had more to say, so she waited quietly. "When you're a kid," he continued, "you think of being Champion as being the strongest trainer and that all you do is hang out with your Pokémon and greet fans. In reality, there's a lot more responsibility involved. It's," he paused, searching for the right word, "exhausting."
Dawn nodded slowly. "I think I understand. Is it worth it?"
"Every day," Paul replied. He sounded so sure and confident of it. "Even though it's oppressing and exhausting and stressful, it's eye-opening and I get to actually make a difference."
Dawn glanced at him. The openness of the conversation was enlightening. For the longest time she had thought Paul had the personality of a brick wall. Now she understood that he had just built up too many walls. She linked her fingers in front of her. Her nails were done perfectly and primly, true to the ways of a stylist.
"You're a PokéStylist now aren't you?" He asked.
Dawn nodded. "Yeah. After I won my Top Coordinator title I wasn't sure what I wanted to do. I really got back into being a stylist because of Lopunny. Even when she was a Buneary, she enjoyed modeling. I guess I just fell back on that after winning the Grand Festival." Paul didn't reply and Dawn took that as a cue that he didn't know where to take the conversation. "How's Reggie?" She asked, changing the subject.
Paul tensed a little. "Married to Maylene," he answered gruffly. From his tone, Dawn knew there wasn't anything that Paul wanted to say about his brother to her.
She dropped the subject and glanced down at her nails. She'd had them done specially for the occasion, but her left index had already chipped and she focused on it during the lapse in conversation. Paul didn't make any attempt to continue the conversation and for once, Dawn was content with the silence.
Another breeze blew through and Dawn shivered, rubbing her arms. She should go inside, but she stayed rooted to the spot. She heard Paul shift and in the next second, his jacket was draped over her shoulders. Dawn touched the expensive material in surprise and finally looked at him. The Sinnoh Champion looked stoic, as always, but there was a soft edge to his dark grey irises in that moment.
"Thanks Paul," Dawn murmured. He grunted in reply and Dawn tugged his jacket closer around him. "People have the wrong idea about you," she informed him, keeping her voice soft.
"Do they?" he asked. His face was impassive and the stereotypes that were always used to represent him came to mind. He was incredibly passive and often isolated, but he wasn't unfeeling.
"Mhmm," Dawn hummed lightly. "Some say you don't feel anything and some say you just don't care. But, I've seen you battle. I've seen that spark in you when you battle the right person. You care about your Pokémon and you obviously care for Reggie and Maylene, anyone could see that too."
"And you?" He asked.
Dawn looked at him. She didn't judge him and kept her face as neutral as possible. "Where do I fit? Am I like Ash and the others, or am I like Reggie? Why don't you tell me?"
"You're neither," Paul mumbled. "You're," he paused, searching for the correct word, "different."
Dawn smiled to herself. "Different I can do," she agreed.
There was a loud crash from inside followed by boisterous laughing and Dawn glanced over her shoulder. It was probably nothing important as the music started right back up and so did the oppressive chatter. Paul glanced between Dawn, the railing and the door. Dawn could almost sense the words on his tongue, so she saved him the effort.
She passed him back his jacket and he took it wordlessly. "Dance with me," she said firmly.
Paul didn't say anything, but he did offer her a hand. She slid her fingers into his and they danced. It was one dance, and not even a full one since the song had already started, but it was enough. It was away from the people and the noise and it was just the two of them on a balcony at the Indigo Plateau.
"You care about him a lot," Paul reminded her as they broke apart.
"I do," she agreed softly.
When she leaned her head against his shoulder, he didn't flinch or move away. Dawn smiled. Maybe she loved Ash, maybe she didn't. Paul's hands mounted themselves on the railing and Dawn brushed the sides of their hands together. She looked out over the view of Kanto and Johto and she knew that this was where she wanted to be. The stone railing was solid beneath her fingers and Paul's shoulder was firm under her head.
She was putting cracks in his brick wall. She knew it.
Author's Note: Just a brief Ikarishipping one-shot to get back into writing Pokémon. I'm really excited because I have the next chapter of Sand almost done! I should get it up this week for CS Week! I can't wait to finish it up and I've already worked on the layout for chapters 6 and 7 so those should come soon too. Sand should be finished up by the end of the summer!
Anyways, hope you liked my little ikari one-shot. I kinda like them together.
- Nicole