Hey beautiful people I hope your day/week/month is going well. I just want to take you into certain parts of my imagination.

So.. I guess I'll just warn you now.

This is my first online fanfic I hope I do well!

All of my content is rated MA…but what do you expect from a 20 year old woman?

Bioware owns it all, except for Falon and whatever else is mine.

Don't sue me…

I wanted to make an impulsive, yet partially neutral FemShep… She felt better this way than regular goodie two shoes! It feels more real to me. This is my twist on her and I'm not going to follow verbatim with the story so… heads up! This is my first fanfic so just let me know if you want moar!

This ME2 adventure was just a collection of written dreams.

Honest criticism please!

I know Latin doesn't translate to English, I did my best!

So now without further adieu… The Mistress inside Shepard.

Chapter 1 Everyday Basis.

It was quiet, not the peaceful kind. It was the silence that screamed volumes to the paranoid. The stars were violently spinning under her and around her... The Commander Shepard clinging, fighting and suffocating all in the lifeless vacuum they called space. She was attempting to slow her heart rate down. The commander heard a voice '...Natum ex natura, non salvet te...' "NO!" Falon knew the dead language. "They still need me!" her mind felt as if it was going to shred open. Falon felt her lungs burning and her heart heaving, trying to leave her dying vessel as she watched her Normandy 2 and her people going down with it.

"Blarrgggg!" Her body shot up drenched in blood red and yellow chunks. It was another nightmare. Falon grimaced at the bucket and its uselessness. She got up and headed for the shower hoping she could scrub away the horrors that haunted her mind. "Get it together Falon- or she'll resurface again." She didn't dare look in the mirror, not after what happened 3 days ago…

It was right after busting Jack out of that slaver hell hole she was trapped in. She was washing her face in the bathroom; getting ready to out drink most of the crew. 'My God, she was so dexterous yet undisciplined.' She marveled out loud. It was refreshing to see a woman take full control. No restraint, no limits, no mercy. As these thoughts surfaced her eyes shone an unnatural teal. The voice came back. "You can become just as powerful as her you know, all you would have to do is give into me…Think about it Falon," A darkened figure appeared with arrogance in the stance she took. Falon stared into the mirror with the face of seeing an old rival…

Herself.

She shook her head hoping it was the meds or lack of sleep. Her eyes reverted back to her almost natural eye color. A pure shade of golden honey, but this time around a thin ring of red surrounded the iris. She knew it wasn't Cerberus that did this to her…She was here way before the Normandy, the Alliance and the grandmother. "Remember how we used to be?" Her voiced cooed. "That's when you were fun, taking whatever you wanted not giving a fuck about anyone or anything for that matter." Falons' voice bellowed. "You're not real." Her shadow snickered "I am as real as your thoughts, I am as real as your desires and I am just as real as that fucking storage bin you boxed me in called your mind." Falon felt the biotic energy racing through her skin. "It's not about us anymore, our universe has expanded, we aren't the same-" Her shadow interceded. "I call bullshit! Let's face it love, what is our first instinct? Kill or be killed. We are the predator never the prey!" The shadow paused, then tilted her head back and laughed. Falon was not aware of his presence. Garrus knew something was wrong when she abruptly ended their conversation...so he waited outside her door. "Even Garrus doesn't know who I am; you're too pathetic to admit that! I am you. Even if you died again I will never go away…Did you think dying was going to kill us? Like all of a sudden the world- no, the universe would suddenly become peaceful? NO! Do you know why? Because we have to carry it, no one else will help take this responsibility when it all goes to shit we will take the blame and the bullets. Sure, you've got some 'friends' for support but remember it's all temporary. No rest for the weary. Now I wish your subconscious would ignore everything all the fuck together so I can some sle-" "SHUT UP! " Falon couldn't take anymore. The mirror exploded from the biotic energy that emitted from her fawn shaded hands. The shadow faded with a giggle. Garrus busted in the bathroom. "Falon!" Her body was slumped on the bathroom floor hoping the maddening cycle would just end. That was the first night she saw her shadow again, her darker form of what she used to be when she had to survive on earth to keep her only piece of family alive. But when she joined the Alliance the discipline forced her to keep that side caged in, almost never losing her cool. But at times just that creeping feeling of impulse would fill her and she would give into whatever desire pleased her. Her reputation became unpredictable and solitary before she even touched the stars…

Falons' eyes started to open.

Vision blurred, everything feeling foreign.

A faint yet recognizable sound of blips was counting her heartbeat per minute.

She never thought she would return to the land of the living.

The smell of antiseptics crept up in her nose making her face scrunch up.

"Falon?" Garrus swiftly turned, almost breaking his neck. "Are you in pain?"

'Wait, I know where I am but…how'd I get here?' She tried to collect and assess the situation. "I carried you," Falon turned as if he could read her thoughts. "Please give me a response…anything…" He said gently. She couldn't figure out why but his tone startled her.

"How bad do I look?" She forced a smile, which didn't work.

"Answer my question first." He stated.

"I'm fine. You know how the smell of anything unnatural makes me queasy." She waved it off as much as she could hoping he would just leave it as it is for now. He hesitated as if his thought process came to a full halt. "It's probably best to wait until the medicine completely wears off, then you can scold her." glided from one side of the room to the other without taking her eyes off her datapad. "Give her a minute, she'll come to." The doctor injected a pale liquid into Shepard's' I.V. Falon exhaled with an unfamiliar sound. He watched as her eyes deeply rolled around from the front to the back of her head. Garrus couldn't tell if she was in pain or enjoying it... Pushing the thought aside, he asked her what was going on. Dr. C excused herself out of the Med Bay.

"Nothing, I thought I'd go with your approach for a makeover, but I had to do something more…subtle…" Falon teased.

"I knew I drove you wild, but that's borderline worship." Garrus shifted crossing his leg over the other while clicking his mandibles. His steel blue eyes showed more of his thoughts than his words. They both stared at each other…Garrus felt helpless. If he only just went straight in and made his presence known. Maybe he could've prevented this incident. He hated seeing her like this. It must of been hard to come to the realization of dying and being resurrected by the same organization that terrorized and experimented on innocent civvies… There was also the threat of a supposedly extinct race being controlled with almost no evidence. Not to mention the pressure of being not only the first spectre of her race and still trying to prove to the council her argument is correct. Even with the evidence sitting right in front of them...

Falon blinked at him while forcing her body to sit up.

"You might not come back, you know." He blinked, losing the track his mind was on. He cocked his head almost overexpressing his curiosity. "When you get lost in your thoughts like that, there's that small chance you can get stuck in there." She pointed to her temple. "Luckily it only applies to people with an IQ in the double digits." He quipped back. Shepard reached out and lightly tugged on his fringe with a chuckle. Surprisingly enough for a woman who handles weapons, hand to hand combat and easily rips through most machines with her 'weak' hand had a gentle touch. He wasn't sure what scared him more, the fact that it was gentle or the fact that he liked it. Garrus got out of the chair and walked toward the exit. If she didn't want to talk, he wasn't going to force her. He paused mid thought when he heard a smaller pair of feet slap the floor. "Could you at least wait until-" Garrus almost reached for her. "Garrus, relaaax," She extended her arms outwards and in an almost adolescent voice. "It's going to take more than a few-" She looked down realizing how the wounds glowed an eerie red from her rebuilt structure. Falon frowned in disgust and mumbled something inaudible in Latin.

"Falon!" Kasumi wrapped her arms around her neck. "I'm glad to see you awake, I-" Kasumi was interrupted. "If you hated the way bathroom looked you didn't have to blow it up; I would've just sent someone to accommodate you." Miranda interceded. "Remind me to call you for redecorating, I've got a few ideas in mind." Jack chimed in with her arms crossed while leaning her back on the door. The Med Bay began to fill in as more people poured inside. More people showed up displaying concern and socializing with another. It was overcrowded to say the least. Shepard squeezed Kasumi on the shoulder, she knew what it meant.

Wherever they were, whatever the situation, whenever it occurred it was time to get the hell out of here. It was their bond.

The two ladies snuck into the elevator and into the detox room. It was really more of a gym but it was deemed the detox room after one of the shore leaves when everyone got drunk and sober all in the same night.

"Thanks Kasumi, for the save, you know mum would've kept me in there all day." She referred to Chakwas with a guilty smile. "What would you do without me?" "I'd be up to my knees in tests and needles." Shepard shivered.

Kasumi gave a curious smile.

"What?" Falons' eyes squinted.

"Just a passing thought." She said wistfully and gave her a curious look. "I've got a surprise for you." She pulled a box out of what Shepard could've sworn was thin air. Her eyes lit up like a holiday awaiting Kasumi's' approval to open it.

She simply nodded.

Falon tore through the wrapping and gasped.

"I thought you would need more appropriate attire for the next 'dress up' mission." Falons eyes gleamed then dimmed.

"I don't even know the next time we have shore leave...I can't accept-"

Falon trailed off when Kasumi crossed her arms at her.

She fully examined the finery with a smirk.

"This. will. do."