Disclaimer! I do not own Supernatural or its characters. All credit go to the wonderful creators of Supernatural and its actors.

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Chapter One

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Past

"Hey!" Mary Winchester said to Sara Novak, as the two old friends embraced. They had grown up together here in this small town, and were both devastated when Jimmy Novak's work took them to the Carolina coast four years prior. That, and Sara's family had settled there as well, and Sara wanted to be close to her dying mother.

"I'm so glad we're back!" Sara said, as she beamed. "And look at you!" she said, with the same enthusiasm, as she looked at Dean, who pulled off his hat. "My, have you grown!" She pulled Dean into a tight hug, and he really wished she hadn't. It felt weird to have someone he didn't really know hug him.

"Cas, you remember Dean, right?" Sara went on. "You two where what? Ten? My goodness, just babes." Her highbrow accent wrapped around her words as she spoke.

"I believe so," Mary replied.

"I remember him," Cas replied, his accent just like his mothers. He remembered him very well. He had shared his first kiss with Dean, though he wasn't sure if Dean had memory of this, and he sure as hell wasn't going to bring it up.

The woman looked at Dean now, who nodded. "Me too," he said, hating the attention. Dean eyed Cas, wondering if he remembers how they left things. They had kiss, and more than once. He hadn't given it a lot of thought, but now, with Cas standing in front of him, with his messy hair, and heavenly blue eyes, he couldn't stop thinking about the first time the snuck into the barn, because they wanted to practice kissing.

"Oh , Sara, you have to come over for tea as soon as you guys get settled. I'm so happy you have moved back…" Cas stopped listening to Mary, as she invited his mother for tea. He was trying to look at Dean without it being obvious. Dean was still beautiful. Cas had always thought so. His eyes were still that beautiful shade of green, but his hair had darkened some. He was tall, lean, and Cas was sure there was muscle being hidden by the clothes Dean wore.

"It's settled then, you, Jimmy, and Cas will join us for supper," Mary said. The women embraced happily, as Dean and Cas looked at each other. They both nodded to one another before following their mothers in the opposite directions.

Present

Dean

Dean stood, looking at his latest painting, with a sigh he put down his paintbrush, and shook his head. He had planned on painting a new piece, but instead he ended up painting an eye. An eye he had painted so many times before. The beautiful shade of blue stared at him, making his stomach ache. He rubbed the back of his neck as that feeling settled in his chest. It was a feeling of longing, and he could never understand it. How could he long for someone he's never seen before?

His phone vibrated on the coffee table, then gave out a little chime. Without looking he knew it was Joey. They were supposed to meet up for dinner, and the clock told him that six was an hour ago. Shit. He shot Joey a quick text, before jumping into the shower. Ten minutes later he was walking out the door, thinking he was lucky to be dating such an understanding man.

Well, dating may have been too strong a word. They were more like friends with benefits who liked to eat out before getting horizontal. They weren't "exclusive" though neither of them where seeing anyone else.

His mind wondered back to the blue eyed man he saw every night he closed his eyes. Along with the blue eyes, the man had messy black hair, and kissable lips. He had a smile that gave Dean butterflies, and hands that made his sex hard. Everything he knew about the man was vivid in his mind. The way the man spoke, and moved. His slender frame. His sexy hip bones that jetted out in stark relief. The color of his skin. The sound he made when he came…Okay, he needed to stay away from that thought.

The problem was he couldn't remember the name. Couldn't remember where he had seen the guy. He had no idea why this man haunted his dreams. He didn't mind dreaming about the man, he was sexy as hell. What he minded was the feelings the dreams always left behind. Sometimes he would wake up, and it would be hard to breathe. It was like he was suffocating, but he didn't understand why. In his dreams he always felt so full of love he was surprised he didn't explode with it. But the love was always accompanied by a fear, and some nights the fear was so overwhelming he woke because he had screamed out loud. All for a man he didn't know. It was utterly ridicules.

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Cas

Cas worked slowly as he drew lips. Lips that were startlingly perfect. He held the pencil with care as he moved about the canvas, being careful not to get any pencil on his hand. Nothing sucked more than getting a pencil smudge on the canvas because you had it all over your hand.

Cas took a step back, getting a gander at his work from a distance. It always helped to take a step back when you've been at something for a while. So far, so good. He smiled at his work. Or maybe it was the lips he was drawing that made him smile. The lips the tugged ever so slightly at one corner.

A whistle came from behind him, as Gabe walked into his studio. "Hot damn," he said, nodding to the picture. "That is amazing."

Cas blushed a little as he always did. He loved when people liked his work, but even after being a professional artist for five years, he still blushed. Figured. "Thanks," he replied as he yawned. How long had he been working?

"You been at this all night?" Gabe asked, as he observed the drawing. "This really is cool, but why so much shading?" he asked. "I think the gallery is going to eat this one up."

"I dream of him," Cas replied, shaking his head. "I've dreamt of this man almost every night for years. The problem is, his features aren't very clear. I mean what I can see of him is vivid as hell, but there are just things that are not as clear. I can draw his eyes, and mouth. I draw the curve of his back, and his hands." Hell, I can tell you what the man looks like below the belt, Cas thought to himself as his body heated. "There are just some things I don't know. So there's a lot of shading in the areas that are unclear."

"Well, I love this, and so will your fans," Gabe replied. "Great job little bro," he said, as he crossed Cas' studio to the little kitchen area.

"Thanks," Cas replied, as he looked over the piece. Yeah, it really was one of his best. He had never tried drawing all the pieces of the man together before, but he liked the results.

He heard a bag crumpling from the kitchen, telling him that Gabe found the chips. Ignoring the sound he thought up an image that sometimes came to him. He was in a barn, and this man he drew had him pressed up against a wall. But not in a "I'm going to kick your ass" kind of way. It was a "I'm going to fuck you," kind of way. He could almost feel the man's hard body pressed up against his own. He could almost feel the man's hips rotating as he pressed his erection against Cas' stomach.

"What has you all red?" Gabe teased, pulling Cas from his thoughts.

"Nothing," Cas lied, as he turned, and arranged himself because his hardness was pressing uncomfortably against his zipper.

"Okay?" Gabe said, dragging out the word. "Anyway, I will leave you to it."

"Eat and run? Cas asked, though he knew that Gabe was just checking in on him. He did that every other day. He stopped in on his way from work, but never stayed long because he had a family who didn't get to see a whole lot of him.

"You know how it is little bro," Gabe said as he opened the door. He hovered there for a moment before looking at Cas over his shoulder. "I'm proud of you," he said, before leaving.

Cas smiled to himself. Yeah, him wanting to draw for a living had always made his brothers laugh, but now that he made more than all of them, they mostly ignored what he did for a living. It was good to hear that at least one of them were proud of him.

Past

Dean and Cas where in the barn, Cas helping Dean with his daily chores, not that he had asked for the help. He was grateful at any rate. Dean kept glancing at Cas who always seemed to meet his gaze head on.

The one thing he badly wanted to know burned at the front of his brain. Did Cas remember? And if so, was Dean the only one of them who was dying to kiss again? He so badly wanted to place his lips on Cas'. Just to see if the flame he had felt before was still there.

Cas couldn't help but to look at Dean as they worked. Dean was shirtless under his suspenders due to the heat of the day. He had discarded it about ten minutes after they started the chores. Dean was pure perfection with his shirt on, with it off, Cas didn't even know a word to use to describe Dean's utter perfection.

They locked eyes again, and he looked away, heat touching his cheeks as he blushed. What he was feeling was disgraceful, and it tried not to think of Dean in ways he shouldn't, but as sure as the sun rise, images of Dean crept into his mind. Tormenting him.

Again they locked eyes, and this time Cas stared until Dean was the one who looked away. Cas stared at Dean, wondering if it was blush that redden Deans face, or the days heat? On impulse, Cas moved to Dean, but paused about a foot away when Dean look up at him. He felt awkward as he stood there, but no words came to the rescue. Instead he just turned, and when back to shoveling the hay.

He wished he could asked the question, but what if Dean didn't remember? He didn't want things to be awkward between them. He looked at Dean one again, and this time their stares locked, and neither of them looked away.

"You remember don't you?" Dean asked, his voice low.

Cas looked at Dean stunned, but nodded. He was sure they were talking about the same thing. He wasn't sure how he knew, but he did. "I do," Cas replied, though he figured the head nod would have worked just fine on its own.

Cas had to swallow, because the way Dean was looking at him made his sex hardened, and the sensation made him feel sinful. His heart pounded in his chest as he tried to will himself to look away, but he couldn't. He was still at a loss for words.

"How does the memory make you feel?" Dean asked in a low, deep voice. He moved closer to Cas, so that if he were to reach out, he could touch him. He knew that he was taking a chance with this. The memory was a fond one for him. He had loved the way Cas' lips felt pressed against his, but he couldn't be sure Cas felt the same way.

Cas' mind raced. He couldn't believe this was happening, and he knew Dean had asked a question, but he couldn't get his voice to work. He had to breathe a few times before the ability to talk came back. "It makes me feel-sinful," he replied with sad honesty. To love another man was just about as bad as being a devil worshiper, and here he was, admitting these feelings out loud.

Dean reached out, putting his rough hand on Cas' cheek. His thumb moved back and forth on Cas' cheek for just a moment before Dean pulled his hand away. "Me too," Dean said, a halfhearted smile pulled at one corner of his lips. Without another word, Dean turned back to the task at hand.

Cas stood where he was, momentarily stunned. Oh lord, he wanted Dean to touch him again. He closed his eyes, and unable to stop himself, he put his hand up to his cheek. Yeah, he could live forever with Dean's touch. No matter how wrong people believed it to be. Dean's touch was simply heaven.

Present

"That's amazing," Sam said, looking up at the piece Dean decided to put in the gallery.

"Isn't it!" Joey added. "I love the technique, and I have to say, this guy is sexy."

Dean laughed as he sipped his whisky. "Yeah, you know, I have no idea where I've even seen him." Dean looked over the painting. It really was a great piece, he just wished he could remember all the details. There are some places where he just had to blur things because he couldn't remember. It made for a great piece though.

"Probably just in passing," Sam said, as he picked up his suit jacket from the back of the couch. "I will be there opening night, but I can't leave with you. This case is driving me nuts." Sam rolled his eyes. "I can't wait for this one to be finished with.

"That's fine, besides, nothing major will happen the day before." Dean finished his whisky. "Is Jess coming?"

"She want's too, but the doctor said it isn't really safe to fly in the third trimester of pregnancy." Sam shrugged. "You learn something new every day."

"Aw, well. It's not like you guys haven't been to one before." Dean looked at the painting, and got that knot in the pit of his stomach again. With a sigh he put down his glass.

"Mom and dad going?" Sam asked, as he pulled his jacket on.

"No, I believe they are in Paris," Dean replied, giving Sam a questioning look. "You guys aren't talking?" Sam and their dad had went through a bit of a rough patch a while back, but he had thought that it had passed.

"We're talking, I just haven't had a lot of time to call." Dean looked at him for a long moment, but decided Sam was telling the truth.

After a quick goodbye, Sam left, and Joey stood up. "Man, I'm tired," he said, stretching. He eyed Dean, sex clearly on his mind. Dean responded with a half-hearted smile. He sometimes felt bad. Like he was somehow tricking Joey. Joey smiled back, and shook his head. "Look, I know that whatever this is between us isn't going to last. You don't have to feel guilty, because you're not leading me on. I know that we are not end game. So in the meantime," Joey said, holding out his hand. "We can still have fun."

"You're too good," Dean said, pulling Joey close. "And yes, in the meantime, we can still have fun."

…..

Cas

"I don't know why, but everything always looks so much cooler in a gallery!" Charlie said, giving Cas an excited hug. "Your fans are going to love this."

Cas looked over to a fellow artist, and good friend. Charlie was a bit of an eccentric artist, but it worked for her, and her art was (to steal a phrase from her) hella cool. "There is a satisfaction to it," Cas said in agreement.

Charlie looked up at Cas' art again. "Sooo," she said, teasing. "Who is the cutie in the picture?" she asked.

"I really wish I knew," Cas replied with a shrug. He ran his hand through his hair. "All I know is he's in here." Cas pointed to his head. And in his heart, but he didn't need to point that out.

"Oh, that's so sweet." Charlie said. "Anyway, I love it, and you should be overly proud of this."

"Thanks," Cas replied. He was about to go on to ask her if she wanted to grab a bit, but they were interrupted by one of the gallery owners.

…

Charlie

"I'm going to go grab us coffees," Charlie said, before leaving the two. There was some mix-up with art placement, and they were trying to straighten it out. They didn't need her for that.

She got in line for the coffee, and just so happened to look over at the nearest table, and she nearly squealed out loud. Sitting at the table was a man who looked exactly like Cas' mystery man. But could it really be? Was the man another artist? If so, then Cas could have seen him at another art show, so that would make sense.

After getting her coffee she had planned on going straight back to Cas, but as she walked passed the table the guy was sitting at, she couldn't help but sit down. The man looked at her with questioning eyes. "Hi, I'm Charlie Bradbury," she said, offering him her hand. She wasn't going to tell him that Cas had been drawing him, but she planned to make sure the two figured it out. But first, she wanted to find out what kind of man this guy was.

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I hope you have all enjoyed the chapter. Reviews and Comments are appreciated. Thanks :D