We're Only Friends Because You Buy Me Dinner; or, the Longest Day in Wilson's Life; or, Just Another Tuesday at Princeton-Plainsboro
Tuesday, January 04, 201005:30 a.m.
How THE LONGEST DAY IN WILSON'S LIFE starts off:
"Please?"
"No."
"Pretty please?"
"No, House."
"Pretty please with Cuddy on top?"
"…No, House."
"You had to think about it."
"I did not."
"You totally did."
"Wouldn't you?"
"…That's not the point."
"House, go away."
"Fine."
Tuesday, January 04, 201008:30 p.m.
How THE LONGEST DAY IN WILSON'S LIFE ends:
"'Night, Wilson."
"Goodnight, House."
"Don't get married again tonight."
"See you tomorrow, House."
The in-between of the FREAKING LONGEST DAY OF WILSON'S LIFE:
07:30 a.m.
"Dr. Wilson?"
"Yes, nurse?"
"House is in the children's cancer ward…telling them his cane is a death stick."
07:35 a.m.
"House, do not give a death stick to the children in the cancer ward."
"Why not? They're all terminal anyways. I'm just, you know, speeding up the process."
"They could get better."
"Do I need to get you a dictionary so that you can figure out what the word 'terminal' means?"
"Go save someone's life."
"Geez, you get testy when you don't know a word's definition."
"Leave."
"Yes, boss."
12:10 p.m.
"Want lunch, Wilson."
"Sure."
"Great, Let's go buy me some."
"House…"
"Oh, you wanna buy me lunch? O.k. You're paying."
"You're a horrible person."
"I know. Go get me lunch."
01:47 p.m.
"Huh. So that's what happens when you drive a crash cart into a wall."
"House! They just painted in here?"
"Then I did you a favor. The color choice was terrible."
03:15 p.m.
*Break*
"House! That mug was a gift from a patient who was cured of cancer."
"He got mad enough that you cured him to give you that mug?"
04:29 p.m.
"Wilson."
"Yes, Cuddy?"
"Have you seen House?"
"Not since…"
*Boom. Crash.*
"YOU BASTARD!"
"Found him."
07:57 p.m.
"You broke my radiation machine? Doing what?"
"Well, Chase was feeling a little frisky…"
"Never mind. I don't want to know."
"Are you sure? He was pretty good with his…"
"HOUSE. Stop."
08:30 p.m.
"'Night, Wilson."
"Goodnight, House."
"Don't get married again tonight."
"See you tomorrow, House."
Wednesday, January 05, 201005:45 a.m.
"HOUSE!"
End.