Fear by Shinigamiinochi
Pairings: None (1x2 in the sequel)
Warnings: Duo POV, violence.
Rating: PG-13
I felt it uncoiling in my stomach, slithering up and wrapping
itself around my heart, constriction unsympathetically. Fear. I hadn't felt it
in quite sometime, months actually, when Heero self-destructed. I have only been
afraid five times in my 15 years. I hate fear, it paralyzes you at the one
moment you cannot afford to freeze. I truly do fear fear. I am scared of
"freezing up" when I have to be active or rather, I am scared because fear is
unstoppable, unpredictable, and no matter how strong you are, or how you prepare
yourself for it, it effects everyone. Even Heero, though he'd never admit it.
The first time I had felt fear was when I was six and my father broke a chair
over me. He had lost control and killed my mother, claiming she was 'weak' and
since she had birthed me, so was I. I had not been afraid for myself, oddly
enough. I was afraid for my mom. Later, an English teacher of mine told me that
a human's first priority is always 'I'. What does this say about
me, then? I never prioritize me over other people. What happened that night,
you ask? I won't bore you with the details, let's just say that that was the
first time I had killed, as well as the first time I had gotten truly mad. I had
been afraid when Solo had gotten sick, when rebels had broken into the church,
when Heero self-destructed, and now, when just minutes ago, Relena had announced
the end of the war…
Owari