Authors Note: This is just a little one shot that has been sitting in my computer for years now and although it's incredibly short and not particularly ground breaking I can never get this little (possible) back story out of my head when I watch this scene in the show. Enjoy!
Moments...
I caught Cas' eyes as Anna stepped away, my lips still tingling from our kiss. I'd seen his expression darken when her lips had touched mine, seen the anger...and the pain. Guilt swelled in my chest and it wasn't guilt over giving Anna to the angels, no, I felt guilty for whose lips I had pictured caressing mine, whose hands I had imagined time and time again roaming my body, bare skin pressed against me... I closed my eyes shuddering, my tongue darting out to wet my suddenly dry lips, as I quickly reopened my eyes, hoping nobody had noticed. I could hear Uriel's voice booming once again but my attention as always was focused on Cas. I watched as his eyes trailed lazily up my body, suddenly flickering back to mine, the bright swirling blue darkening by the second, his expression full of something I couldn't place? For months I'd watched him whenever we met, studying his moods, watching for the little things that made him who he was, like the way he licked his lips when he we got nervous, the way he tilted his head when he was curious, and the way his eyes always told me what he thought about everything, even if he didn't say it himself. I could still remember how it felt when I'd made him laugh at the park, his face had changed completely, all the stress and the worry and the tiredness had gone and he'd looked beautiful and the fact that I could make one of God's angels laugh, if only for a few seconds, had made me happier than I'd ever imagined.