Charles: (Walks, in and hangs up his jacket. He sniffs the air.) That smells delicious honey.
Marlene: Thank you darling. (Pecks Charles on the cheek.) How was work today?
Charles: Same old, same old. (Thinks) Actually, now that I think of it, something did happen today.
(They walk into the small kitchen. Throughout the rest of this scene, Marlene pacing around the kitchen, working on a meal, stirring pots and pans, checking the stove, and other bits of housewifery. Charles is sitting at the table talking. He is very expressive and uses his hands to gesticulate a lot.)
Marlene: (All ears) Tell me about it.
Charles: So I was behind the counter, working the bar at the rink-side, like I always do...
Marlene: Of course.
Charles: So out of nowhere, this kid starts screaming. He can't have been more than say... 16-ish. Just a kid, really. But he's yelling, something about taxis, and... pants...
Marlene: (Skeptical) Pants, darling?
Charles: I don't understand it any better than you do. But from what I can gather, it seemed as if he was insulting out city.
Marlene: All of New York?
Charles: From Brooklyn to the Bronx. Kids these days, I tell you. Anyway, his date...
Marlene: His date?
Charles: Yeah, I forgot to mention her. Oh, you should have seen her on the ice. She was awful. You could tell she'd just come for the dress.
Marlene: I see. Parents these days, I tell you.
Charles: Too right you are. So, after the boy's little outburst, the girl seemed kind of scared if you get my meaning. She was trying to calm him down.
Marlene: I can see why.
Charles: Absolutely. And it worked, in that he stopped yelling. But you should have seen the look on his face, it gave m the creeps. But anyways, all of the sudden, he takes her hand and starts talking all earnest-like. He was quiet again, so you couldn't hear him. But you could tell what he was talking about. He was pulling the, "Let's run away together" speech. I swear I see it twice a week.
Marlene: (Worried) She didn't go with him, did she?
Charles: Of course not. She told him no, but she may as well have spit in his eye. He jumped out of his chair and shouted at the top of his voice, "Why not!" God, this kid must have been out of his mind, because he didn't even notice that the entire bar was silent, just staring at the two of them.
Marlene: Really?
Charles: I mean, we have the occasional spat in there all the time, but this kid could have been heard throughout the entire rink. So his date is panicking, trying to get him to shut up, and he's going on and on about how he would get a job...
Marlene: He doesn't sound very stable.
Charles: I would have to agree with you there, but at least she got his to stop shouting fairly quick. But, now he goes off on this rant. You should have seen him. You know that bum on 95th Street?
Marlene: The one who's always going on about the end of the world? He's scary.
Charles: Exactly the guy. Well, this kid sounds just like him, except he's going on about bridge and carrying suitcases and monkeys in pants.
Marlene: Pants again? What does any of that have to do with anything?
Charles: I wish I knew. But, the really good part. He ends his rant by saying, "You don't see what I mean at all."
Marlene: Well, who could?
Charles: Precisely. So his date actually says nearly that. What she said was, "Maybe I don't, but maybe you don't either."
Marlene: That sounds about right.
Charles: I absolutely agree. So there's maybe three seconds of silence after that, because the whole bar's still watching. But I swear, those three seconds feel like hours.
Marlene: I hate that.
Charles: Yeah, it can petty pretty bad. So what the kid does next. Why, I don't even what to say. Let's just leave it at very impolite.
Marlene: Oh, just say it.
Charles: (Gets up and whispers in her ear.) *******
Marlene: Charles! How could you say something like that!
Charles: You asked. I said it was rude.
Marlene: Humph!
Charles: I'm sorry.
Marlene: (Glare)
Charles: Can I go on with my story?
Marlene: (Interested despite herself) Go on.
Charles: (Relieved) So the girl is nothing if not even angrier than you. I mean, see how mad you got just hearing it. Imagine having it aimed at you.
Marlene: That poor soul.
Charles: So the boy realizes what he did, and he's trying to apologize.
Marlene: Why would he eve bother?
Charles: Search me. And then he tries to offer to bring her home, and she has basically the same reaction as before.
Marlene: As she should.
Charles: Of course. So he tries, to apologize a few more times, but is heart isn't in it, he just sounds angry and not sorry at all. And after that doesn't work, he just up and leaves.
Marlene: Just like that?
Charles: Just like that. Wasn't that something though?
Marlene: Yeah and... oh, look at that. Dinner's ready. (Sets out pan)
Charles: This looks delicious sweetheart. What is it?
Marlene: Oh, I thought we'd change it up a little instead of just chicken Tonight we're having roast duck.