I had a little headcanon about why Makoto was so protective of Haru and it kind of spiraled into this. This is like the preface of the actual story. :x I plan to time skip to their current age in a chapter or two.. I think. Oh.. and I guess I should add warnings hm..

Strong themes ahead, read at own risk... even though it's not that bad yet. ~_~

The neighborhood was normally quiet at this late of an hour. It wasn't unusual to hear the sound of the ocean waves carried by the wind to the narrow little street or the footsteps of a passerby. Makoto had always treasured the silence; leaving his window open had become a habit. He loved how the warmth from his covers balanced out with the cold from outside. He truly loved listening to the quiet night. And maybe a few months ago, Makoto would have been asleep already, peacefully wrapped in his blankets, but tonight... everything was different. Tonight, he stayed upright in his bed clutching onto his pillow with his cell phone in his right hand. Without even realizing it, Makoto formed a new habit for nights just like tonight that occurred far too often. His eyes drifted to the window, glancing towards Haruka's house where the lights were still on. And he waited, knowing very well that this was none of his business. That he should turn away like his parents do and pretend it doesn't happen. But how could he look the other way when it was Haru? How could he turn away and do nothing?

The sound of shattering glass made Makoto jump out of his skin. He felt his stomach sink immediately. It never used to be this bad. How did things get like this? His shaky fingers quickly typed out a text to Haru.

[are you okay?]

And he waited, like he always did for a reply he knew would probably never come. It really was late, past midnight, and they both had school in the morning. Haru has missed so much school this year already. There were certain days that no matter how hard he tried, he couldn't get Haru out the door. Haru would just end up getting angry and hiding in the water until he gave up. Makoto's legs bounced impatiently, the uneasy feeling in his chest wasn't going away. How many times has this happened already? How many restless nights did Makoto spend clutching his phone waiting for a response from Haru? And how many days followed where Haru said nothing.

'That's just like him though...' Makoto thought. And it was the blunt truth, that Haru would never burden anybody else with his needs. If people will continue to look away, they will continue to enable that mindset that it was the right thing to keep everything locked up, and nothing would ever be done to change the course of this fate. The sound of shouting could now be heard if paid attention to. Makoto didn't want to look away. A blind eye never fixed anything. He didn't want to be like everybody else in this world. Not when it came to Haru. And it might have taken every ounce of courage he had, but Makoto forced himself to believe he could change things. That slipping out of his bed and tip toeing downstairs was the right thing to do. That sneaking out the backdoor, barefoot to avoid noise, was what needed to happen.

If the night was any colder, Makoto would be shivering, or maybe that was just the anxiety from taking another cautious slow step closer to Haru's home. The distance between their houses was short, it was less than a minute walk, and Makoto would compulsively count his steps knowing exactly how many it took to reach Haru.

122... 123... 124...

The door was right before him and Makoto suddenly realized that this was a very poorly thought out idea. Knocking on the front door would definitely bring him problems. Makoto shuddered at the thought. The truth of the matter still stuck, that this was none of Makoto's business. This wasn't his place. Any word he says would be overstepping his boundaries. He felt increasingly uneasy, and decided that it was a smarter idea to approach this another way. Say... through the backyard. He climbed over the short fence as quietly as possible, not even daring to take a breath until his feet touched the ground on the other side. The noise from inside continued, and Makoto sighed, approaching the open backyard. The light in Haru's room was still on. Makoto slid open his phone.

[how about a swim?]

Makoto waited, internally pleading for an answer or at least something that would cause his stomach to stop turning. The shouting was much louder standing in Haru's backyard than it was in his room across the street. If Makoto felt small before, he was absolutely tiny now. The world was big and there were so many things he couldn't understand like why people had to die or why two people's promising words suddenly meant nothing after so much time. Or why an innocent person that was never involved in the first place had to be caught up in someone else's mess. How much could a thirteen year old really do in a place that wasn't meant to be understood by someone so small? When the noise towered over his thoughts and his shoulders shook unwillingly, how could he actually fix anything?

The faint beeping of his phone snapped Makoto out of his thoughts, and he quickly clicked it on.

[sure]

"It's gotten worse, hasn't it..." Makoto murmured, uncertainly bringing up the subject that he's been long avoiding, but Haru had already jumped into the water. This weather was by far too cold to be swimming in, but this was one of those rare instances where Makoto didn't have the heart to say anything about it. Instead, he sat on the edge of the pool, allowing the water to reach just below his knees, watching Haru come to peace with the world.

"What was that?" Haru shouted back when he resurfaced. It seems like he's already forgotten about everything that wasn't the water. And that's just how Haru was, this water was his sanctuary, the place he felt at home. Makoto simply smiled and shook his head.

"Forget it."

As if it were that simple.

"Come in the water, Makoto," Haru swam over to where Makoto's legs dangled in the water, "It's really nice."

"Ah, that's okay, I'd end up getting sick," Makoto quietly murmured under his breath. It was unusual for Makoto to sound so uncertain about anything. Haru noticed it immediately. He also noticed how badly he was shivering.

"Are you cold?"

Makoto snapped out of his thoughts, catching Haru's concerned eyes. No, Haru was supposed to be at peace here.

"Not at all, sorry!" Makoto quickly covered, "You know, I guess the water does feel kind of nice."

For Haru's sake.

He carefully unbuttoned his shirt, willing his hands to stop shaking, and tossed it over near Haru's discarded clothing before letting his body slide into the water. It was much colder than Makoto anticipated, he winced as his body slowly adjusted. Haru held back a laugh watching the boy move around in agony.

"So you are cold," he added.

"Ah! N-No, just.. give me a minute," even his voice was shaky. Makoto would never understand how Haru could just dive in head first when it was this cold outside. That must be passion.. or love.. or something of the sorts. Haru swam out to the middle of the pool, letting the current carry his body in one fluid motion. Makoto could see the calm expression on his face when Haru let himself be enveloped by the water and he couldn't stop a thought from entering his head.

Was Haruka really happy?

Was this all it took for him to really forget everything that was happening? Or maybe... maybe it doesn't even bother him in the first place. Maybe this entire situation was completely over exaggerated.

"H-Haru-chan.." Makoto called out, bringing his eyes into focus, and failed to notice that Haru wasn't in the middle of the pool anymore. He got lost in thought again. Makoto spun around, eyes quickly dashing to the corners of the pool, Where did he go?

"Haru?!" he cried out again. No answer.

Not until...

"AH!" Makoto yelped when he suddenly felt two hands press to his back. He turned around and came face to face with the radiant blue eyes that only seemed to shimmer when in a place like this. Blue eyes that were barely an inch away from his own. Blue eyes that were filled with light.. when just a moment ago, they were dull.

"Why are you so scared?" Haru muttered, placing his hands on Makoto's shoulders and turning him around again.

"I'm n-not, you j-just surprised me," Makoto shivered. He held his breath when he felt Haru's arms wrap around his shoulders, and legs around his waist.

"What are you-"

"You're cold, right?" Haru interrupted. The warmth from Haruka's body spread across his skin as the arms around his shoulders held on tighter. He could feel the shivers subsiding little by little, yet Makoto stood still.

"Haru..."

"Mm?" Haru's head fell to rest on Makoto's shoulder.

"It's gotten worse... hasn't it?"

Makoto felt Haru flinch against him. Haru was still hiding, still keeping everything to himself like he was taught to do.

"It's fine." Haru murmured against Makoto's back, holding on tighter and sharing his warmth.

"It's not fine... I'm really worried," Makoto quietly admit. He bit his lip when Haru didn't respond. This was none of his business after all. He was crossing into territory that he didn't belong in. No matter how much he cared about Haru, no matter how much he wanted to help, it didn't matter in the end. It didn't matter when there was nothing he could do. Makoto was sure that Haru had realized this months ago, there had to be a reason. And Makoto kept telling himself that there also had to be a way.

A way to break down Haru's wall. A way to save him from all this.

"It's late..." Haru said suddenly as he unlatched himself from Makoto. All the heat that accumulated over the past few minutes immediately dissipated, Makoto began to shiver again.

"You want to go back?" he watched Haru's expression lock, just like it always did when he didn't want to answer.

"I guess."

It only took a few minutes for them to walk back to their little street. A quick and silent walk that left Makoto with the same uneasy feeling he started with. He set out to do something tonight, didn't he? What was accomplished exactly?

Nothing.

He was supposed to change things. He was supposed to bring Haru to some place that was safe. But he did nothing. He clenched his fists upon the realization that tonight was just like every other night, he looked the other way, he was too scared to say what needed to be said, and things would repeat just like they alwa-

"Makoto..."

The green eyes looked up. They were stopped on the stairs between their homes and once again, Makoto held his breath, unsure of what to expect.

"...thank you."

I am not confident at all. Oh god. Why am I writing this. ;/