Taunting

Chris McLean was a sadist. He knew what he wanted—he liked it when people suffered, and he liked it when it was obvious. However, he only knew how to get it en masse. He had no experience at deliberately, painstakingly, fine-tuning his attacks so that they would achieve the level of pain known as "personal." He didn't want to live without such access, because it would be boring that way. Chef Hatchet had the solution.

"Hey," he said, "I know a guy who's really good at this."

"A guy who's really good at what?" Chris asked.

Suddenly, the sound of two boots approached, and Chris was visibly surprised. "Hello," the man said, "I've come to intern for free at the beckoning of Chef Hatchet."

"More free interns? That's great!" Chris shouted. "What's your name?"

"My name… is not important right now. You can call me the Taunter."

"The Taunter…" Chris said, unconvinced by the name. His face was a mix of disapproval and doubt.

"Yeah, they call me the Taunter because I'm good at getting under people's skins… especially teenagers."

"Oh!" Chris shouted, beginning to grin, "The Taunter!" Chris laughed in the innocuous-sounding way he does, but Chef Hatchet knew its meaning well—it was a very cleverly disguised maniacal laugh.

Chris led the Taunter to the cabins. "This is where the campers are staying—I want you to go visit them, and do your work!"

"No problem," the Taunter said, smiling, heading to one of the cabins.

Chris laughed again, and then Chef Hatchet laughed too. Though Chef Hatchet sounded more threatening in the execution of his laugh, its meaning was not nearly as dangerous.

Chris led the Taunter around the camp, showing him all of the campers. "Here are our campers," Chris said, "Heather…"

"Bite me," Heather responded.

"Gwen…"

"Eh," Gwen shrugged, pretending to be in a hurry.

"Leshawna…"

"I don't know what you're up to, Chris, but I don't like it," Leshawna said accusingly.

"Izzy!"

"Oh, boy, are we going to do something awesome!" Izzy asked.

"Maybe later… Lindsay," Chris continued.

"Oh, what are we doing?" Lindsay asked, confused as hell.

"Beth…"

"Hi," Beth yelled perkily.

As all of the girls walked by, the Taunter dutifully took notes of their responses.

"Katie and Sadie!"

"We get called together, because we're BFFFL's!" Katie and Sadie shouted in unison.

"Bridgette…"

"Oh, hello," Bridgette said, politely.

"Eva…"

"What do you want, Chris?" Eva screamed.

Chris backed away, and then said, "Nothing, nothing…Courtney!"

"I really don't appreciate being called last out of all the girls!" Courtney said, in a huff, blowing her bangs into the air.

"A lot of girls," the Taunter responded.

"Actually it's a 50-50 split, but ladies first after all!" Chris shouted, "Trent…"

"Hey, cool, I'm the first guy," Trent said, and then sat next to Gwen, causing her to blush.

"Justin…"

Justin just walked by looking as attractive as he possibly could, and then sat down.

"Owen…"

Owen giggled, and then said, "Sorry, I'm late! I got held up at breakfast! Sweet! The seat next to Justin is empty!"

"Noah…"

Noah walked by, completely nonchalantly, until he noticed the Taunter and Chris were staring at him. "What do you want, a soliloquy?" he asked in a relatively monotonous voice.

"Cody…"

"I'm gonna sit next to Gwen!" Cody shouted, as he ran as fast as he could to sit opposite Gwen to Trent. Gwen slightly grimaced. Cody blushed and grinned.

"Duncan…"

"Listen, McLean, if this is what I think it is, I don't like it!" Duncan said angrily.

"DJ…"

"Oh, my, a new friend!" DJ said, and then he waved sweetly.

"Harold…"

"'Sup? I suppose he wants to see my mad skills?" Harold asked, then started acting like a master martial artist, and then tripped. Duncan laughed and Noah rolled his eyes emphatically. The Taunter took notes of these responses as well.

"Tyler…"

"I'm a terrific athlete!" Tyler shouted, then bumped into the bench causing all the campers to roll to the right, and Eva to fall off.

"Someone will pay for this…" Eva said threateningly.

"Geoff…"

Geoff walked across, looking bored, and then, out of nowhere, shouted "Time to party, dude!"

"And finally… Ezekiel!"

"Oh, savin' the best for last, eh?" Ezekiel asked, skidding along the ground, and taking his seat next to Katie and Sadie.

"Well, do you think you can handle it?" Chris asked.

"Yeah," the Taunter said, "This bunch'll be easy."