A/N: Okay so this is a oneshot for Haruka Tenou Distant Sky King for the 25th review on 'Unsent Letters'
I hope you like it~
How had Lukas ended up here; curled up on his boyfriends lap having an emotional break down? He was curled up on Mathias's lap as he sobbed into the other's chest, waiting for the other to abandon him here all alone.
Why wouldn't he? Lukas wasn't exactly a prize catch when it came to boyfriends, at least he wasn't in his opinion. The Norwegian could write a list a mile long about the things he didn't like about his body, from his apparent 'girly' face to his podgy stomach. And on top of that there was the scars and secrets he kept from everyone- the cutting and the eating, or rather the lack of eating.
Lukas couldn't remember now long it had been since he first started cutting down on his food intake, but he knew it was because his stomach was flabby and podgy, despite what other people said. He had tried to get slim, partly to please Mathias and partly to please himself. Everyday the number on the scales went down little by little, but just because he was lighter didn't mean he was thinner. There would always be a little extra fat here or there that wouldn't go away no matter how much he staved himself.
There came a point around a year ago when he had his first break down; he was alone in the house, he was unwanted, he was unloved and the world hated him. He had sat in his room crying all night until ,when in the early hours of the morning, he'd had enough. He sat on his bed in the dark and slit his wrist open and simply watched as the blood flowed down his arms, staining his clothes.
Lukas had woken up the next morning with an almost refreshed feeling he hadn't felt for a long time. he blamed it on the cutting, he knew it was wrong of him to find pleasure in such an act, but it had given him a outlet for his pain and a funny sort of feeling of excited freedom. And so from that day on, he had started cutting on a regular basis; usually once or twice a week, sometimes five or six during the darker times.
He had kept it a secret all this time, it was his dirty little secret and guilty pleasure. No one was meant to find out, but fate had worked in a funny way and now Mathias knew about it all.
To he honest, Lukas was slightly surprised that Mathias hadn't gone and left him here yet and it just confused him further as to why the other didn't hate him for being an 'attention seeking emo fag' as society would call him. But nether the less, the Dane was still here, running his hand through Lukas's silvery-blonde hair, holding him tightly and murmuring words of soft comfort.
And for the first time in a long time, Lukas felt safe, he felt loved, and he felt that maybe, just maybe, everything would get better.