It's pretty self-explanatory. This is just something stupid that I wrote for an English assignment about a year ago that I found in my closet while packing for college. Normally I wouldn't post something like this, but this was so bad that I couldn't resist. I would hope that my writing has improved a bit from this, as well as my sense of humor.
Beowulf opened the doors of Heorot High and strutted down the hallway, obviously under the impression that he was pretty hot stuff. He was a transfer student from Korea and therefore stereotypically was a master in all forms of martial arts. He had heard the rumors on Facebook about the school bully, Grendel, terrorizing the wheelchair-ridden nerd Hrothgar. So far he had destroyed thirty pieces of Hrothgar's homework, and if the poor boy went anywhere near the Fine Arts hallway he was sure to have his chair tipped. Beowulf read about these horrors and, sensing another chance to show off how cool he was, gathered together his Equally Stereotypical East Asian Posse and transferred the next day.
Beowulf went straight to the Fine Arts hallway and struck a macho pose, telling everyone that passed by him about all of the other bullies and small mammals he had defeated before. Grendel, hearing the ruckus, lurked out of his hiding place in the janitor's closet. He was descended from a line of drug addicts so he was rather deformed and bitter, and he did not make a pretty sight out in the light of the hallway. His fixed his misshapen eyes on Beowulf in a glare.
Before anyone could make a move Grendel punched one of the miscellaneous Asians in the face, promptly knocking him out cold. Beowulf, disregarding this, said gallantly "Grendel, I could easily destroy you with my backpack or a textbook. I have defeated my friend at a swim meet that for some reason was infested with sharks, among other great feats that you cannot hope to compare to. However, I will make this a fair and honorable fight and use nothing but my hands!" No one felt like mentioning that since he was an expert at hand-to-hand martial arts he didn't need to use any weapons anyway.
Since this is high school the fight didn't last very long. Beowulf drop-kicked Grendel while thinking I hope a foot counts as a hand and beat him mercilessly while his friends chanted "Fight! Fight! Fight!" Afterwards Hrothgar gave Beowulf his lunch money and the answers to the Calculus test as rewards, and there was much rejoicing… until Grendel's mother, who had serious rage issues, found out about the incident. The End.