"Hiccup what do you see me as?" Toothless asked quietly.
"What? What kind of question is that? What do you mean?" Hiccup returned.
"I uhm. I heard you crying again. And I know it's about your dad and I know it was my fault but I couldn't resist it. I'm sorry. I'm so sorry. I just want to know where we stand. Are we still friends, or are we on the edge or do you… Hate me?" Toothless looked nervous. He didn't want to know as much as he needed to.
Hiccup drug over a chair and sat in front of Toothless. He smiled and scratched under his chin.
"I don't hate you, Toothless. And we're not in the edge. I don't think we're the same but not any less. Right now you're my only real family. My mom's around but we don't click on that level you know? I can't talk to her like I can you. Okay?" He leaned forward hugging Toothless.
Toothless enjoyed his human's contact over anything else but he pulled back from it.
"What about Astrid? You could talk to her. I'm sure she'd listen to you."
Hiccup sat back in the chair. He squinted his eyes at his dragon. "If I didn't know any better I'd say you're trying to push me away bud." Toothless looked away ashamed.
"I just can't imagine you wanting to be near someone who's caused you so much pain." He admitted. "I don't want you to remember what happened every time you see me. I don't want to hurt you more than I already have. And I don't want to see your pain anymore."
Hiccup leaned forward again wrapping his arms tightly around Toothless' neck. "Please don't think that. You're the one I go to first every time and there's no one after you. When there's something wrong I come to you. When I invent or make something I come to you. When I'm happy it's because of you." He leaned back just enough to look Toothless in the eye. "There is no replacing you. And as twisted and fucked up as this is going to sound. If I had to choose between you and my dad." He butted his head against Toothless' snout. "I would choose you. And I think, no, I know he'd understand. We were getting along but I feel like he knew that he'd been replaced as my 'go to' guy with my problems. I don't think he jumped in front of you because it was the manly, or even fatherly thing to due. I think he did it because one of us without the other is broken. I think he knew that even though I'd be sad and you'd feel guilty that we'd make it. Together."
Toothless nuzzled the side of his human's head. "I hope he was right." Toothless whispered.
Hiccup chuckled. "He was rarely wrong." He pulled back again, smiling. "I don't have anything to do today. And I can get my mom to take over for the day. Do you want to do anything? Just you and me?"
Toothless took a second to think about his offer. "No, I think that we should just stay here. I just want to relax and not worry about anything today. If that's okay?
Hiccup chuckled and stood, kicking his chair back. "Of course we can. It'll be nice to just relax. I haven't had a chance to since becoming chief. I don't know how you do it Toothless. Your Alpha job seems much easier than mine. And I only have to deal with the people here."
Toothless snorted. "It's not any easier than yours. But our war with you is over so at least I don't have to deal with that. Who the alpha stands with is who we all stand with. I stand with you and so will they. No questions asked, more or less."
"Well that's good." Hiccup said but his ever insecure mind panicked. "D-d-do you uhm ever regret like siding with me? Like would you ever renounce standing with me?" He worried.
"Well sometimes you do make me mad. And sometimes I wonder how you're still alive. And sometimes I want to eat you. But that's what people do. And it's very unlikely that I will ever renounce my stance. Even if you and I had a huge falling out, the people of Berk have treated me and the other dragon's too well to not stand with you." Toothless smiled and nodded.
They moved over to Hiccup's bed. Toothless climbed on and allowed Hiccup to lay on his stomach and chest. Hiccup absently scratched at Toothless' sides as he calmed himself.
"Thank you." Hiccup whispered.
"For what?"
"For worrying about me. I've never really had that. Someone who really cares how I feel."
Toothless hummed. "I'm sure Astrid cared about how you feel. And I'm sure your mom does. We care about you. Don't think you're alone. But I like the feeling of being the only one that cares. Thanks."
Hiccup huffed. He hated when his dragon points out obvious things he overlooked. "Well shut up. I know they care. It's just nice knowing you do too. Probably more than them if I had to guess."
"As much as I hate to say you're right. But it's very likely that it's true. And I'm okay with that. If you are."
"And it is." Hiccup returned. They sat for a minute allowing their conversation to sink in.
"Hiccup, can we take a nap? We can do something later if you want." Toothless asked. He hadn't noticed Hiccup's light snoring until he asked. "Good answer." He chuckled. "Good night?" He wrapped himself around Hiccup and slept.