Hey guys! So this is my first fic. Like ever. I've been working on this pretty hard and I have no idea how you guys are gonna find it. Gonna keep my fingers crossed and hope you like it!

–H

Chapter 1

She's there, trembling at your bedside.

"I don't want the next commander. I want you."

You try to console her.

Death is not the end, you told her a lifetime ago, but this feels like an ending for both of you. Rather than reassuring her that you will meet again, that one way or another, you will find her, no matter the cost - you know you will, but you also know that she won't believe you, and that this isn't what she wants to hear, what she needs to hear - you tell her, "You were right Clarke. Life is about more than just surviving."

Her cheeks are stained with tears; her golden locks clinging to the side of her face and neck.

She has never looked more beautiful to you.

"In peace, may you leave the shore,

In love, may you find the next,

Safe passage on your travels,

Until our final journey on the ground,"

She recites the skaikru blessing, and you feel yourself take your last trembling breath when she whispers, "May we meet again,"

Her lips are pressed to yours, soft, gentle, and you pass in peace, assured that one day, you will see her again.

It's been a month since the outbreak. A month since I ate a proper meal. A month since I've had a decent night's sleep. And with each passing day, with each dark, merciless night, I feel like I will never be the girl I used to be. I'll never get to watch Matt as he paints a story on the school bleachers, I'll never get to graduate, or go to UCB, or even go to the movies with my friends again. Hell, I don't even know if any of my friends are alive.

"Alicia!"

I break out of my daze and glance to my right. Chris is standing on the road, wooden baseball bat in his hand, looking at me, annoyance written on his face.

"Come on! We have to get back before night. We don't wanna get stuck in the dark with the walkers"

I snap to attention, suddenly remembering the fact that we were out looking for supplies, to help us last another week filled with walkers, hunger and the unknown.

Chris glared at me, as if it was my fault we had no supplies. He acts authoritative now, but when any situation occurred that needed some actual leadership, he would keep his head down and stay on the side. It annoyed me to no end but I held my breath, not wanting to distract myself from the task at hand.

I quickly speed up till I am walking side by side with Chris, my eyes darting around the street we were on, taking in the houses - which would have looked completely normal, if not for the crimson stains on the sidewalk, and the occasional broken window.

Nick is standing a few feet away from us walking fast. It's just the three of us out here. Mom, Ofelia and Travis are boarded up in a "safe" house. Travis tried to get me to stay behind with them, but I felt like I had to do this, like something bad would happen if I didn't help.

It's been a strange past couple of days, for me. I would have dreams of blonde curls, blue eyes, as bright as the sky and a smile lit with happiness and another emotion. It was the smile Matt used to have on his face, every time looked at me, but it seemed much more real. I've never been able to put a name to the face, I'm starting to think that, maybe , she's just a figment of my imagination. And that I've created her in my mind to make me feel safe. Protected.

Chris nudges me lightly, and points to a small, run-down grocery store near the end of the street.

"What about that one?" he asks, gaining Nick's attention as well.

"It looks alright, I guess" I mutter quietly, but he's already making his way towards the store with Nick.

The hair on the back of my neck is suddenly standing on end, and my eyes flit to each side of the building. I feel like someone's watching me. But it's too quiet to be a walker, and the place seemed otherwise deserted. I dismiss the feeling as nerves and rush to catch up to the boys, as they cautiously open the store door and stepped inside.

The store had been ransacked. It was almost completely empty, aside from mouldy bread, and meat that had a weird green tinge to its surface.

"Well, I think this was a waste of time" Nick states, annoyed. "There's nothing here. We might as well go back now. No need to risk what's left of our lives"

"Wait just.. look around. Carefully" I don't know why but I feel compelled to stay here "I've got a feeling about this place. Don't know if it's good or bad but.. it wouldn't hurt to spend five minutes looking right?" I'm mostly speaking to Chris, knowing that he would give it a chance.

"Yeah, sure. Whatever" It was Nick that answered. I fail to hide my surprise and he definitely notices as he turns around with a grunt and says "I'm gonna check the pharmacy section. See if I can find any meds" and walks off. It makes sense now. I can see how the lack of heroine was affecting my brother. The bags under his eyes, the pale, clammy skin. He needed medicine, and was desperate to find anything.

I distract myself from Nick by turning around and busying myself with some half empty shelves of out-of-date soup and beans.

"Ermm.." Chris mutters, gaining my attention. He's standing in the middle of the store, like a lost puppy, unsure of what to do.

"Dude, you're like 17. Take some initiative." I grit my teeth as his eyes widen slightly, and he looks down in embarrassment, though still without moving. I take a deep breath, not wanting to yell. "Why don't you look over there, by those overturned shelves?".

"Ahh yeah, sure" he says, relieved.

He wanders in that direction and I turn back to the shelves in front of me, checking all of the BBE dates on the labels to see if there was any edible food.

"Guys!" Nick's voice echoes through the store "Over here!" I try not to cringe at his volume as I walk in his direction, silently hoping there are no undead around to hear it.

He's crouched under a counter, pulling out small sealed crates. One is already open next to him, packed with tiny boxes and bottles of pills.

"Oh my God, Alicia, thank you for making us stay" he exclaims as he downs two 500mg ibuprofen tablets.

I barely pay any attention as I immediately drop to my knees and cut through the tape of another box with a Stanley knife from my back pocket. This one is identical to the other, and I pile the pills into my backpack. Chris is beside me doing the same.

When we've stuffed our bags with as much as we can carry, we stand up ready to leave.

"Shit" Chris curses, surprised by the sudden weight on his back.

He flails midair for a moment before he topples into a shelf, effectively pushing it over, into another one. I freeze as I watch the shelves act as dominoes, each making a loud crash until they are all lying on the floor.

The three of us drop to the ground, deadly silent. There are no sounds emanating from outside, and we wait another minute, before tip toeing towards the front door. We slide outside, carefully, not letting the door, or ourselves make any noise.

"I think we're in the clear" Chris says, relieved.

A low growl is heard, in response to Chris, but it didn't come from Nick or myself. I turn around and my breath catches, my blood turning to ice, despite the warm air of LA.

There are around a dozen walkers dragging themselves towards us, and I grab onto my brothers arm, fear suddenly consuming me.

Nick raises his crowbar, till its level with his shoulder, his arms shaking. Chris mirrors his stance with his bat.

"Lysh, when I give the signal, run." He whispers, voice cracking.

I barely have any time to protest as he pushes me to the right, and runs in the opposite direction, inching closer to the walkers, while yelling profanity to gain their attention.

"OVER HERE BITCHES! COME ON! OVER HERE!"

Who the hell is that?