So, guys, this is my first time writing a TVD fanfiction. Originally wasn't a Daroline fan, but after all the Daroline fanfiction I've read, it blew my mind. Now, yeah, I am doing this. Enjoy :)

Retaining Sanity

Caroline Forbes had no idea how she managed to drive her way to the Boarding House. Everything around her was an unmistakable blur, everything inside of her infinitely broken. All she knew was that Tyler was gone, had left her for good. Never coming back. And Elena. Tears formed in the back of her eyes as the memories came rushing back. The memories of her best friend, her Elena, who had lived so selflessly for her entire life, who had sacrificed herself for her friends constantly, who had cried when someone had suffered because of her, being thrust into a life she did not want, had never wanted.

She stopped at the gates of the mansion, and let her head drop to the steering wheel. And then she did the only thing that made sense in a time where everything around her was senseless, the only thing that came naturally in a world of unnatural. She let the tears fall.

Caroline opened the door of the Boarding House, hoping against hope that it was empty, and she could drink in silence.

"It's not empty, but you can drink in silence," called out a soft voice from the opposite end of the parlour. There, sitting gracefully by the window, his face covered by shadows, was Damon.

Caroline sighed. Damon was the last person in the world she wanted to see, but he was also the only person she knew who would actually let her drink out her woes in silence. "How did you know that's what I was thinking about?" She asked, picking up a bottle of bourbon. "Because that's what I'd want if I were you," came Damon's reply, in that same soft tone. She frowned as she sank into the couch, her back to him. It was not like him to be speaking like this, without the slightest hint of amusement in his voice. No matter how the grave situation around him, he had the ability to diffuse it with his sarcasm and quick-wit, something she had to grudgingly admit was admirable about him.

She poured herself a generous helping of the drink. She took a deep sip and regretted it immediately. Couching and spluttering, she turned to Damon. "How strong is this?" He gave a weak chuckle. "Try the unopened one, that's better," he replied, turning and looking out the window. She raised her eyebrows. "No witty comeback, no insult. I take something is very wrong-" She broke off as realisation dawned on her. He couldn't be this broken unless- "She chose Stefan, didn't she?" She asked, her voice dropping as well. He continued to look out the window for a moment, before slowly nodding. Caroline took a deep breath. "I am sorry," she whispered. She had always thought that Stefan was a much better choice for Elena, but she had always known deep down, though she wouldn't admit it to anyone, that it was Damon who had loved her more, in ways much more than Stefan had.

Caroline didn't know how long they sat like that. It could've been ages, in which she devoured the entire bottle he had suggested before he moved from his position. In a flash, he was beside her sitting on the couch. She jumped, and his mouth formed in a tiny smile. He reached forward, took the bottle she had earlier opened, and took a swig. He cleared his throat before speaking, which struck her as even weirder because Damon was never nervous. Never. It was a law of the universe. "So, wolf-boy left, huh?" Tears formed in her eyes at the mention of Tyler. Yet, there had been no hint of malice in his voice, just what sounded to be genuine concern. Throat too tight to speak, she nodded. He looked at her, and for a moment she could see the pain in his eyes, the crumpled, defeated expression on his face. But it soon cleared, as he offered her his bottle. "Strong is what you need right now, Blondie," he said in the same soft voice. She took the bottle and took another sip. She felt cold, despite the fire. Clearing her throat, she said, "I am going to head back, I was just here because I wanted to- um, well I wanted to raid the wine cellar. I'll be back in the morning, Stefan and Elena ought to be here by then."

She was nearly at the door before Damon sped in front of her. He opened the door and held it for her, and for the first time in a while, she actually smiled. She stepped outside, and waited for him to close the door, but instead, he donned his leather jacket and stepped outside with her. "You headed home?" He asked, looking straight ahead. "Yeah, I am. Why?" "I'll drop you off, you're drunk." She laughed at that. "Firstly I am a vampire who doesn't need your help, and secondly, even if I did, you couldn't help me because you can't, because you're drunk as well."

His lips curved the tiniest bit before he said, "I just want to have a word with Liz." This stopped her all right. "What? Why?" She was panicking now. "Is she in danger? Still? I mean I know Alaric threatened her, but I thought you took care of that-" She was ranting and she knew it, and she probably would've continued, had he not stopped her. "She's fine, I just want to talk to her, that's all." She frowned but thought it better than to argue. Handing him over her keys, she smirked and said, "You crash my car and I rip your head off." Damon flashed her one of his traditional smirks as he took the keys.

"No, no, wait, stop."

Caroline grabbed Damon's arm to make him stop, as he hurriedly applied the brakes. He turned and frowned at her. She sighed and said, "Mrs Lockwood is in there. I can't- I can't face her right now." He looked at her for a moment and then looked back at her house before turning the car around. "Where are we going now?" Caroline asked, noting that he had not taken the route backwards. He stayed silent, and Caroline settled back down, finding, to her immense surprise, that she really didn't want to know.

"Of all the places," she said laughing, as they entered that Salvatore crypt. Caroline felt creepy being in here with Damon, while they were surrounded by the remains of his dead family. He sat down against a wall, and Caroline sat down leaning against the opposite. There was a long silence which was broken by his soft voice. "I am sorry, you know." She stared at him, hard. He was staring at the ground as he said, "I am sorry for using you the way I did. It was wrong, and you deserved worlds better."

Caroline opened her mouth, and shut it back again. She thought back to the times he had fed on her, compelled her, and wiped away her memories. She had felt like shit when she had turned into a vampire and remembered all of it. It was torturous to know that she had been used the way she had. She carefully observed Damon, as her mind travelled back to some other memories of him. She remembered the time he had risked his life to save her from werewolves on a full moon night while she was being tortured. She thought of the time he had saved her from Tyler and had gotten bitten himself. She thought of the time he had risked his entire existence by sparing her mother when she had tried to kill him, how he had questioned Caroline when she was being rude to her mom. How his actions had made sure that she had a healthy relationship with her.

She sighed and said, "I guess I forgave you a while ago. It was just easy to think you were a dick, that's all." He gave a weak laugh and slowly adjusted himself so that he was more comfortable against the wall. She looked at him curiously and asked, "What did you really want to talk to my mother about?" He swallowed before he spoke. "She is the only human friend I have left."

The ride back to the Boarding House had been quiet. As they entered the house, Damon pointed to the stairs and said, "Carol might be staying at your place for a while now, you can take the guest room. It's third on the left to the top of the stairs."

Caroline nodded but entered the parlour with him anyways. She let out a deep breath as she sank back into the couch, the second time in the last few hours. Damon sat beside her. He swallowed thickly again before saying, "I am sorry Ric tortured you." Her eyes widened and she immediately turned to him. "Stop it. Don't do that yourself, what happened to Ric was not your fault." He stared at the fire for a few seconds before a single tear slipped from his eyes. She immediately took his hand in hers. He shook a little as he said, "He was a good man. He didn't deserve to die the way he did." Saying this was too much for him, for just as soon as he said it, he broke down in her lap.

Caroline was stunned beyond belief. Never, in all the time she had known Damon Salvatore, had she seen him lose control of his emotions like this. Tears sliding down her own face, she held Damon in her arms as he sobbed. There was something about seeing the most confident, gutsiest man you knew break down like this. It made you feel the need to comfort him beyond anything else, made you feel the urge to nurse him back to normalcy. Even if it was Damon. Especially if it was Damon.

The door opened and Stefan and Elena came in, their hands intertwined and their faces a perfect picture of happiness. Caroline's heart clenched. Damon, however nasty or mean he was, did not deserve this.

Stefan and Elena stopped in their tracks as they witnessed the scene unfolding in front of them, the smiles instantly wiped off their faces. A teary-eyed Caroline comforting a sobbing Damon.

Damon's tears had stopped at the sound of the entry and woke up his face still leaning against Caroline's body as he wiped the tears off his face. The expression on his face broke her heart. She thought of a few hours ago when she had been consumed by the sadness of Tyler leaving, and here he was, Damon, who had lost his best friend and been told by the love of his life that she had chosen her brother over him. Again.

Damon stood up and cleared his throat, his back to Stefan and Elena. Elena stepped forward and put a hand on his shoulder. "Damon, please, I- I am so sorry."

Her words angered Caroline beyond reason. Was this it? She thought of a few hours ago when Elena had been upset by the fact that she had been transitioning. Now here she was, hands in hands with Stefan, obviously having completed her transition, undoubtedly having made him promises of eternity, and a sorry was supposed to make it okay for Damon?

Damon stiffened at her touch. His mind travelled back to everything he had done for Elena in the previous few years, everything he had given up, and a traditional Damon smirk formed on his face. "Sorry for what Elena?" He asked, reaching down for the same bottle of bourbon he had left on the table earlier that night. "For choosing over my brother over me and rejecting my love." He raised the bottle and said, "Same old, same old."

Elena gasped at his words and tears slipt from her eyes. Stefan visibly paled, and Caroline placed her head on her hands.

Damon gripped the bottle tight as he donned his leather jacket he had removed and kept at a chair. He walked over to the door. He paused, with his hands on the doorknob, and turned around. His eyes met Caroline's, and mouthing a thank you, he was gone.

And that's the first chapter. Please let me know in the reviews how it turned out. And for those who're bothered with Damon and Caroline being out of character, it gets better in the upcoming chapters, I swear. Anyways, I'll update soon, hold on tight.