Hello! Welcome to my new fic "Sophomore Slump" (From the Fall Out Boy song Sophomore Slump or Comeback of the Year). I got the urge to write this fic a while ago, and a lot of planning went into it, because I needed to figure out who taught what subject and all that... Warnings, yeah

-OOC, majorly. Sasuke and Genma especially. (Sasuke is hard to keep in character, especially when I'm writing a fun fic. Oh and, Genma isn't quite this way in the series... .)
- Swearing, obviously. They're high-schoolers.
- Yaoi. I have pairings planned, but they're multiple, and I don't feel like listing them all. Though if you know me, it should be obvious.
- Some angstyness... Self-mutilation is a possibility.

Dedicated to: Marion Junior Senior High- My school! It's the basis of the fic, this is very heavily based off of how it's run. Why is it dedicated to my school? Because if it weren't for my school, I would be able to count without the use of my fingers and toes, and I would know my left from my right. Who needs that? Also because... I hate the school, but I love it. So, here ya go!

A blonde teen walked down the sidewalk that led to the side door of Konoha Junior/Senior High. The collar of his orange shirt flapped in the light breeze. His hair glinted in the still-rising sun. It was a typical first day of school: warm, sunny, and bright. The teen entered the building and went to the main entrance, checking the bulletin board for his homeroom. "O through Z, Mr. Hatake. Oi! That perv?" he said to himself, earning a wierd look from the girl next to him (whose name he couldn't remember) and a scared look from a little seventh grade girl. He turned down the hallway he was in, then took a left turn at the end, a few rroms down he reached the one he was looking for.

When he entered the first person he noticed (aside from the grey-haired teacher sitting on his desk reading a construction-worker orange book) was his raven-haired best friend, Sasuke Uchiha. "Hey Sasuke!" the blonde shouted.

Sasuke looked up, "Naruto," he said, nodding his greeting. He was an extremely attractive guy, with many fans throughout the school. His pale skin contrasted perfectly with his dark hair, eyes, and black "Senses Fail" tee.

"So, did you pick up any hot chicks while you were away?" Naruto grinned. After receiving a glare he said, "Okay, okay. Any hot guys?" Yeah, Sasuke was Naruto's gay best friend.

"No." Sasuke said quite simply. "No one can compare to you." His voice was flat.

"I know, but you can't have me, sorry." Naruto joked. Sasuke had been his best friend for years, Naruto was the first person Sasuke had met after moving from Japan as a young boy. Naruto had been there for Sasuke through the many rough times in his life, and even finding out Sasuke was gay did not distance their relationship at all. The announcements came on, the same woman's voice that they'd been hearing since entering seventh grade at Konoha ringing through the speaker right over the two boy's head welcomed them all to the first day of school. Then went on to tell them all what was for lunch, and give the sports schedules. "All modified fall sports have their first practice today, and varsity soccer has practice." Naruto sighed, "Why do we always have practice the first day back?" He and Sasuke were both on the varsity soccer team, which was something considering varsity didn't usually start until eleventh grade.

"Idiots, we've already had tryouts. It's not really just starting."

"I know, but I was planning on going home, relaxing, and taking in the fact that this will be the only day we won't have homework this year." the blonde said, glancing at the teacher who was just putting his book away, "Bet that perv's going to give us more homework than he'll even take the time to grade."

"Hey, Naruto! Do me a favor, and try to not talk during my classes as much. Especially if you're going to insult me." Mr. Hatake said. He was wearing the mandatory black slacks, and a loose black button-up shirt. Not normal for a teacher though, was the mask covering the lower half of his face. The students didn't understand why he wore it, he'd just told them he would wear it everyday so they better learn to deal with it. Or he had ways of making them suffer (1). Also uncomon of course, were his mismatched black and red eyes, they'd never gotten a story behind that one either.

"Pardon, Monsieur Hatake." Naruto said sarcastically in French. Mr. Hatake was the French teacher, and Naruto had been his student since seventh grade, somehow. Mr. Hatake had been very young when Naruto first had him, as he was still quite young (despite the grey hair).

"Yeah whatever," the grey-haired man sighed. He pulled a stack of papers off his desk, "When I call your name, come get your schedule," he held up the stack, "And a hallpass." He picked up a stack of salmon colored cards.

"That's the worst hallpass color ever. Seriously, they need to stop using that color.(2)" Naruto said throwing a distasteful look to the hallpasses.

"They just use the colors they can get, which is why bus passes are the same colors." Kakashi mused before calling out, "Chelsea Pomerantz."

A few moments later and Sasuke's name was called, then Naruto's. When they went back to their seat the first thing Sasuke did was whip out his dark blue Sharpie and begin coloring his pass. He then stole Naruto's and colored it- No more hideous salmon.

Naruto looked at it appreciatively before saying, "You know how pissed the teachers get when you do that?" He went to write his name on it, and it couldn't be seen. Unless you held it at the right angle, of course all teachers had the time and patience to do that.

Sasuke shrugged, "I've been doing it since seventh grade, they can deal." He held his schedule next to Naruto's and compared, "Our core classes are together. Photography and French, obviously." He continued down the list, his eyes widened as he reached Phys. Ed. "We have Gai." He traveled one class down, "Oh fuck is this a joke?" For there under sixth period on every A, C, and E day was

'Health

Rm. 85

G. Shiranui'

"We have fucking Genma for Health?" It may sound crazy that he was this freaked, but the sophomore year was the big year for learning about sex, and Genma was probably the biggest pervert Sasuke had ever met.

"Are you serious?" Naruto asked incredulously. He glanced down at the schedule to confirm it, and yes, he did have Genma for Health. And if that weren't bad enough, eighth period every day they didn't have Health, "We have him for Study Lab."

"Kakashi, is this some kind of joke?" Sasuke asked their once again reading teacher.

"Is what a joke?" he looked up with his odd eyes.

"Gai and Genma? We really have them?" he glanced back down at the list, "I'd also like to know why I know all of them."

"I'm a tenth grade homeroom teacher, my friends are tenth grade teachers. They're not all nearly as bad as Gai and Genma though. You have Raidou, and my sweet little Iruka!" he cooed the last part, clutching his hands to his chest. "I feel like I haven't seen him in a while. He's been so busy with getting ready we haven't even been able to get a good fu-"

"Stop, now." Sasuke growled in his deep voice.

"You can be so mean sometimes." Kakashi sighed, then glanced at the clock remembering that he had 'teacher' things to do. "You should go to your lockers now. When I call your name come get your locker number and combination." He made his way down the list.

Sasuke and Naruto walked down the hall to their lockers, Naruto glaring at his locker card, "More fuckin salmon! It's not like we even need these cards really, we've had the same lockers since last year."

Sasuke smirked at his friend's rant about his hatred of the color salmon. He knew it would only be worse when they reached their lockers. He stepped up to his, giving a far from warming look to the odd, faded, teal-green color. Come to think of it, he wasn't sure if it was even faded, it just looked it. It was that nasty of a color. But at least they weren't the dark reddish-salmon lockers. Salmon. The school administrators had a salmon fetish. Ew, fetish. That brought bad 'school admins having sex' images into his mind. He opened his lockers grabbing the stuff he needed for his second period class (they didn't go to first period on the first day of school) then closed it. He glanced to both sides, Naruto was at his right, and an unknown person was at his left, as no one was there. Whoever the unknown person was had some nasty shit on their locker, it looked like semen(3). 'Someone was happy to be back in school.' he thought with a smirk.

"Oi, Sasuke-teme! We need to go back." Naruto said grabbing Sasuke's hand and dragging him. Sasuke sighed, wondering why he'd ever taught Naruto Japanese, now the blonde used it to insult him. Then a girl squealed behind him, Sasuke groaned. He knew that squeal, he heard it a lot, it was the squeal of a girl who was somewhere between a, er, friend and an enemy. Also the squeal of a girl who was taking a peek at his boxers that were always hanging out of his loosely tight pants. Yes, loosely tight, kind of like that eighties song "Hold On Loosely", they were loose, because they were always falling off his hips, but somewhat tight around his legs. Nearly impossible to explain. Back to the girl, Sakura, who had come up behind him and tweaked his boxers- WHAT?!

"Sakura! What are you doing?" He yanked out of Naruto's grasp, turning to face the girl. Her pink hair was partly back in a clip, one section on each side left out of it to frame her face. She was smiling all the way to he green eyes. She advanced on Sasuke a step, pushing herself towards him, Sasuke glanced down to see her cleavage throughly hanging out of her red shirt, well that's against the dress code. "Sakura, fucking leave me alone."

"But Sasuke," she whined, "I haven't seen you all summer! I want to talk to you."

"Next time you want to talk to me don't grab my boxers," he answered darkly.

"That's hard to do, I mean, they're there. And blue is such a nice color on you." she smiled closing her eyes, which caused her to miss Sasuke hurrying back to class with Naruto.

"You know, if you were straight, you would never be lonely." Naruto said as they entered Kakashi's classroom.

"Yeah but I'm not, and I can't stand girls." Sasuke said, ignoring Naruto who was shaking his head.

"Yeah but when's the last time you had a boyfriend?" Naruto watched Sasuke pause. It had been a while, too long. Long enough to force him into certain activities with Genma to relieve the tension, but he'd rather not think about that. Naruto smirked as Sasuke threw his powerful death-glare, "Yeah, that's what I thought."

Second period was History with, Kakashi's boyfriend, Iruka Umino. They entered the class and he welcomed them to their first day of school. "This year we'll be doing world history. Actually, this year is Asian history. One of my favorite subjects, and definitely one of the least boring." He went on to tell them what supplies they would need that he forgot to put on the original supply list, the course overview, and all of those boring, first-day-of-school things.

They entered Kakashi's classroom for the second time in what felt like not enough time. He stood up and moved to the front of the room, something he didn't do often. "I've had you all for four years. You already know how it works. I'm not old, so don't call me Mr. Hatake. It's Kakashi. At this point of class there's not a lot of vocabulary, it's mostly culture. I'll give you the notes, give you the work, you study, and take the test. If you choose to go, there's a trip to France in February. We start planning for that immediately." He sighed, looking at the clock. Not even ten minutes into class. "I can't very well teach you anything today. Speaking exercises, find a partner and introduce yourselves."

"Bonjour. Je m'apelle Naruto. Comment t'apelle tu?" (Hello. My name is Naruto. What is your name?) Naruto said easily.

"Je m'apelle Sasuke. Ca va, coup?" (My name is Sasuke. How are you, fuck?) the raven smirked.(4)

"Comme ci, comme ca salaud." (So, so bastard.)

"Sasuke, Naruto, I know what you're saying." Kakashi said, a grin evident in his voice.

"I know you know what we're saying Kakashi. I don't care. You're not going to do anything about it." Sasuke answered. Kakashi sighed and returned to his book, giving them more time to finish. More time that they didn't need, that is.

"Hey! We still have the same group! D' accord homme!" (Alright man!) Sasuke and Naruto turned to the table next to them. A shaggy brunette, Kiba, was sitting next to a ponytailed raven lazing back in his chair, Shikamaru.

"Kiba! Long time no see!" Naruto yelled unnecessarily. They were right freaking next to them. Sasuke sighed, he had nothing against Kiba really, they were more or less friends, but he could be just as loud as Naruto. Shikamaru was great though, despite the fact that he spent all his time staring at the ceiling, but he was quiet. He was a genious too, a lazy one, but he always knew what was going on. He was the first person to figure out Sasuke was gay actually.

Kakashi called for the class's attention. They were a half hour into class, he'd done enough teaching right? "I can't do anything else with you, do whatever." He immersed himself into his book.

Naruto glanced at him, "Hey, Sasuke," he said, "You know that book Kakashi always has? What's with that?"

"It's porn, Icha Icha Paradise, a yaoi series from Japan." Sasuke answered.

Naruto blinked at yaoi, but that only made sense. A gay man would read gay porn right? Still, it was a bit unnerving that his teacher was reading porn in school. Sasuke meanwhile, wondered why it had taken Naruto four years to actually ask about it. Of course Sasuke would know though, he lived with Kakashi. Both boys were ripped from their thoughts by Kiba pulling a chair up to their table. "Kakashi is still as lazy an ass as ever, huh?"

"He'll never change." Sasuke said, flicking his eyes to their perverted, lazy, teacher.

"Hey, Kiba, do you know what he's reading?" Naruto asked in an excited voice.

"Yeah, porn. Shikamaru figured it out the first day we had him and told me. You have no idea how much it sucks to get a nosebleed on the first day of school..." he trailed off with a sort of resentful look.

"That was your own fault." Shikamaru said suddenly, his eyes were closed and he was still leaning back with his hands behind his head. Kiba glared at him for a bried moment, then the glare faded, and Sasuke noticed his gaze linger for just a moment longer than was necessary.

Fourth period brought Photography with A. Sarutobi. As they sat down at the tables in the room (which was also the Tech room) Mr. Sarutobi leaned against his desk, unlit cigarette dangling out of his mouth. Sasuke felt somewhat relieved, he knew Mr. Sarutobi, and he wasn't bad really. He wasn't crazy like most of the other teachers, not completely crazy anyway. Teaching at Konoha automatically made you at least a little crazy.

"Welcome to Photography. The objective of this class is pretty obvious, you take pictures. Some assignments will require you to take pictures of certain things, or photoship pictures in certain ways. But the majority of the pictures you take in this class will be whateve you want to take. Which is why all the lazy kids choose Photography." He threw a glance at Shikamaru. They already knew each other as Mr. Sarutobi was a friend of the family.

"Are you calling all of us lazy?" Naruto shouted.

"No, I'm just saying that all the lazy kids in your grade are probably in this class." Asuma said. Naruto glanced around, Shikamaru, Tiffany... The two laziest kids in the grade were in this class, yep.(5)

"Asuma," Shikamaru drawled, calling the teacher by his first name, "Should you have a cigarette in here?"

"I don't see why not, it ain't lit." He said, talking around said cigarette.

"So troublesome," he said, giving up the argument.

"Damn lazy kid." Asuma said. He always had a cigarette in his mouth, lit or unlit. He got away with it too as long as he hid it when the principle was around and his students didn't go out and tell on him. Which they didn't. "Right well, I have nothing left to do with you other than let you pick shelves. Do that and we're done. But don't leave the room." He walked back over to his desk and sat down in front of the computer.

Fifth period was Phys. Ed. with G. Maito. Sasuke and Naruto very reluctantly made their way to the gym, not looking forward to class with Gai. Naruto had to physically force Sasuke through the door, pressing his body against Sasuke's. "Oh, Naruto, is that an offer?"

"No, pervert." Naruto grumbled. Some people would be bothered if they were a straight guy with a gay best friend who had a habit of making "advances" on them. But Naruto was okay with it, he knew Sasuke didn't like him that way so it was fine.

They entered the gym and saw a tall figure with green shorts and a green shirt, Gai. "Hello, my youthful students! I am glad to see I have all of you in my class once again!" he said as soon as everyone was seated on the beachers that were partly pulled out. Sasuke glanced down the row and saw that very few people looked excited to be there. Shikamaru was lazing back, Kiba was next to him in a conversation with Shino Aburame, one-sided conversation mind you, Shino wasn't much of a talker. Sasuke himself was leaning against the back of the bleachers with his arms crossed, Naruto lying on the bleacher next to his foot. Continuing to search the line of students, Sasuke froze, for on the bottom bleacher, standing right in front of the ranting Gai ("Ah! The beauty of your youthful energy!") was Lee Rock. Was this a joke? The junior was like a mini-Gai, not to mention a junior. Sasuke also saw Neji Hyuuga and TenTen sitting just behind him. So they had a mixed gym-class of Sophomores and Juniors.

"Alright my students! Come get your locker combinations and numbers!" Gai said enthusiastically, brandishing a clipboard, and losing papers in the process.

Sasuke rolled his eyes, waiting for his and Naruto's name to be called. Once it was, they went up to get their combos, then went through the side-door of the gym and into the locker room. He and Naruto had lockers right next to each other, allowing them to be able to talk while they uh, figured out how to open their lockers (Actually, they just sort of talked). "We have Gai and Lee in the same class, can't you just feel the youth?" Naruto said sarcastically.

"Look at it this way, that'll be nothing compared to Genma. But that's probably not a very good thought." Sasuke said, speaking pure truth.

"You've always sucked at being cheery. You're so emo all the time." Naruto grinned, wincing slightly when Sasuke punched him.

"Don't call me emo."

"Hey Sasuke, Naruto!" Kiba's voice yelled, "What's taking you? Sasuke, are you molesting Naruto?"

"Damn Kiba, I was just getting his pants off." Sasuke said flatly as Kiba rounded the corner to see them.

"Just gotta be sure, ya know?" He walked back out, Sasuke and Naruto following.

After escaping the enthusiastic horror that was gym-class (Gai had asked them to run laps the first day) they went to lunch. Easily the easiest part of the day. Sasuke and Naruto took a seat at the black booth under the New York State map showing where all of last year's graduates had gone. Kiba, Shikamaru, and Shino came in a moment later, followed by Chouji Akimichi. The group had established this as their table last year. Old habits die hard, right?

"Anybody know what's for lunch today?" Naruto asked.

"Pizza!" Chouji answered with an air punch. Everyone else made grossed-out faces, Kiba and Naruto very loudly so. The school's pizza could very easily be put on a list of "Unedible substances." Grease, gross sauce and cheese, and soggy crust made up the horrible food. The last time Sasuke had actually bought it (in seventh grade) he'd dropped his napkins on it, all of them were immediately soaked right through(6). Since then, he hadn't even bought it, let alone eaten it.

Nonetheless they all got up and crossed the cafeteria to get in the lunch-line. However Chouji was the only one that got the pizza, the rest of them got bagels. There go-to lunch choice since seventh grade, man they were sticklers for old habits. Chouji immediately began wolfing down his pizza, getting his chubby face covered in grease. "And you wonder why girls don't like you." Shikamaru said, throwing a glance to the large oval table next to theirs where Sakura and her friends sat. Apparently, the boy's table and the girl's table next to theirs were the "cool tables." Glancing around at his friends he wondered how on earth that was possible. Sure they were great soccer-players and everything, which automatically equaled something akin of royalty at Konoha, but Sasuke was the only sort of "cool" one among them. The rest of them acted like complete losers all the time. "So troublesome." The rest of the guys looked at him wierd.

Sasuke took a deep breath as he walked down the halls to room eighty-five. He was very close to turning around and going to Kakashi's room to avoid this class, very close indeed. Naruto didn't completely understand Sasuke's issue, yeah he knew Genma was... eccentric, but he'd never seemed that bad. Then again, Naruto didn't see Genma nearly as much. Kakashi and Genma were best friends, Sasuke probably saw a lot of him. And in an environment where he had to talk about sex, it wasn't safe. It just wasn't safe. Nonetheless, he entered the classroom and went to sit down at a table but- "SASUKE!" something larger than him became attached to his back.

"Fuck, Genma!" he shouted attempting to push the man off.

"Mmm, is that an offer?"

"No!" he finally got Genma off of him. He turned to face the man. He was grinning through the toothpick sticking out of his mouth, a black bandana tied around his head, uneffectively holding back his long brown hair. Really, he was an attractive man, Sasuke would probably think he were hot if he weren't so God damn annoying.

"You're so mean sometimes Sasuke, I haven't seen you in a long time." the man pouted, quite well considering the toothpick and the fact that he was in his twenties. "I was just trying to greet one of the hottest men I know."

"What would Raidou say?"

"Oh he knows he's still the hottest man I know. You're just up there, ya know?"

"Yeah, yeah," Sasuke said, walking to sit at the desk next to Naruto.

"Welcome to Health!" Genma said enthusiastically, "This year we'll be learning about sex, that wonderful thing that keeps the world running." he had a fondness in his voice.

"Nympho." Sasuke mumbled.

Genma went on, "If you're sensitive to the subject you might as well leave my classroom right now because I won't go easy on you." he scanned the room watching for someone to leave. They never did the first class, give them a while though and he would lose a couple students. Usually about then he started talking about the hot sex he had with his boyfriend. He continued, "So, you all know what sex is obviously. When a man and a woman have it, it usually makes kids, if you're into people of the opposite sex like that." he made a face of distaste. "Sex is also your gender, male or female. Yeah, that's pretty much the only two definitions, but you've already covered that. This year we go really indepth." There was a glint in his eye that seeped perversion.

"Genma if you start scaring your students I'm telling Raidou." Sasuke said giving Genma a serious look.

Genma stopped, eyes widening. He always either had "fun" with Raidou, or Raidou ruined his fun, that man had no middleground. He would most certainly make him lighten up if Sasuke told him. "Alright you scheming little brat."

The next ten minutes of class was spent with Genma talking on and on about how great sex was. Sasuke was about ready to kill him, especially when he started to mention him, "When you don't get enough sex, you'll get moody, and jealous of people that are getting some, like Sasuke here."

"Genma!"

"Sorry Sasuke, you know I love you." Genma went over to Sasuke and hugged him, but was pushed away when he pinched the teen's ass.

Needles to say, Sasuke was very happy when the final bell rang and he could leave class. Sophomore year at Konoha Junior Seniour High promised to be very interesting indeed.

((1- Thousand Years of Pain... (Or pleasure, if you're Iruka.) .

2- If I could just describe to you how much I loathe the salmon passes... I have about twenty of them laying hidden around my bedroom (I don't throw out passes... We do not ask why.), but I loathe them. My school has horrible taste in color.

3- True story man. Me and my friends were wandering the halls- er, doing what we were supposed to do, during Study Lab, one of my friends stops in the bathroom. We stand outside playing with the lockers, and one of them has something on it. We're all like, "What is that?!" Then I noticed how much it looked like semen... As soon as I started writing the locker scene I knew I needed to incorporate that.

I should explain the A, B, C... thing: At my school,we have different schedules for different days (as I'm sure most schools do. And most schools probably have a smilar schedule to ours.) It goes through F, and depending on which day it is, that affects which classes you have. I for instance have Art and Study Lab on A, C, and E days. But Homos and Queers (Er, sorry, home and careers) and Health on B, D, and F days. Just to clear that up for anyone that might not have that kind of schedule.

4- No, my teacher did not teach me to swear, me and my friend figured it out on our own. There's actually a thousand ways to say fuck though... Also, if you're a fluent French speaker, and my words are off, I apologize, I'm using an internet translator and they aren't always very reliable. And I'm not spelling things wrong on purpose, I have no way to put accents on the letters in wordpad.

5- For the record, I have every intention of taking Photography... WHy? Because, despite the fact that I don't know how easy it is, it really is a do whatever you want class. And I'm lazy... Doing what I want to do works for me. So, that's where the "lazy kids take Photography" statement comes from.

6- No lie. That's what my school's pizza is like. My friends and I have actually put napkins on it to see how bad it is... Grossness.