A/N: This was inspired by my mom & my family,
who have no appreciation for silence and space. I thank the education system of
Puerto Rico, for not making its students go away to college, just because I live
15 mins away from college doesn't mean I still have to live at my parent's
house!!! This is mine and ya can't steal it!!!
I'll Be Alright
There are so many words I can write
floating in the air
as I feel them deep inside
but I can't get them out of my chest.
Feelings unexplored
by mind, body and soul.
Not by indisposition,
but by not having a chance
I haven't being given a chance.
A chance to make everything different
to change my point of view.
To make things clearly easier
or get lost inside them with you.
I like extremes.
Complete love or complete loneliness.
I don't like the numbness I'm feeling.
Uneasy at times, well it's better than being numbed.
I can assure you that.
But at the end of the day,
when I go to sleep, last thing that pops into my mind
is how I got no one.
Not a crush, not a lover
not pain, not someone to hate.
Nothing. Nothing. Nothing.
Nothing but a big empty bed.
Which I fill, or at least 1/4th of it.
The rest is just sheets and pillows...
something to fill the void.
Something to take space
space available if I loved someone.
Space available if I cared about someone.
Space available if I was friends with someone.
I can't comfort myself.
No, I can only pity myself and I shouldn't.
But how can I stop?
How can I stop pitying myself when it's better that hating me?
Or better than ignoring that
this empty void isn't going to be filled by shallow stuff.
God, I'm not asking for the world!!!.
Not inch of it!
I'm just asking 4 someone 2 free up some space in it.
Someone that can infatuate my senses,
and make me lose my mind.
Make me shut out all noise
that's not coming from his mouth.
Make me lose myself forever in the reflection of his eyes.
Someone to make me lose myself in the blink of an eye.
Yeah,
I'm asking for some space.
Space to breathe.
Breathe my life and it's meaning.
I know it has a purpose,
I just can't seem to think of it right now.
And I need quiet.
I need silence.
Silence is something that all throughout myself
I've never had, owned.
I've just had a slight grasp of it and it slipped
as soon as I got out of the womb.
Now all I look for is peace.
Peace to live in silence, quietness, and space.
I don't hate no one.
I don't hate you, I don't hate them, I don't hate no one.
Ok, so I lied a little, I hate some people, but it doesn't come to the case.
I just wouldn't hate them as much as I do, if they'd give me some space.
Reality check.
No one gets what they want.
I know, been there, done that.
It's over, get over it.
Yeah yeah all the expressions I've heard them before.
But I'm working, hard,
to get what I want.
I don't think it's gonna come to me as a gift.
Cause let's face it,
no one gives such good presents.
Everything has it's price.
And in the society I live in...
the price of what I want, is way too expensive for me.
But you know what?
Turns out, that all I want will some how bore me.
Yeah, I know it's gon be monotonous.
But I guess it's what I want.
Otherwise I wouldn't be asking for it.
It should be cheaper though.
How many people do you know ask for monotony in their life as a gift?
Not many, huh?, I bet.
Yeah, "don't worry about me
and just like the movies
we played out our last scene"....
See that's where people turn wrong.
The monotony I ask for
it is supposed to be broken by that someone that takes that space from the world.
And the new monotony, at least, that's what I think the people will think about me
won't be monotony to me.
So, as I said before.
"Don't worry about me,
and just like the movies.
We played out our last scene..."
I'll be alright, don't worry.