The Big Fart Theory
written
by
Ben Dover
Attention: This is a fanfic based on characters created for the show Big Bang Theory. I do own any rights to the show or the characters. Just writing this for fun.
Chapter One: Penny Farts
Leonard Hofstadter was watching TV from the couch in his apartment, enjoying his Saturday, when Penny walked in. She shut the door behind her, a dismayed expression on her face.
"Penny, what's wrong?" Leonard asked, turning his attention away from the TV.
Before Penny could answer, she farted rather loudly. She then started to say something, and yet another fart ripped out of her bunghole.
"That's what's wrong. I can't stop farting," Penny said, bursting into tears.
"Now, now. Come over here and let me console you," Leonard said.
Penny ran to the couch and sat beside Leonard. He put his arm around her.
"Why is this happening now. I have a hot date tonight," Penny said, wiping the tears off of her face.
"Don't you have a hot date every night?" Leonard asked.
"Yeah, but this one's even hotter than usual. He has a nine-inch penis," Penny said, perking up.
"How do you know that?" Leonard asked.
"He sent me a picture of it on my phone," Penny said.
"Can I see it?" Leonard asked sheepishly.
"Sure," Penny said, playing around on her phone.
Penny handed Leonard her phone with the picture of a big dick showing. Leonard looked at the picture, a devilish grin forming on his face.
"Damn! I'm not even gay, and I'd suck that big dick!" Leonard said, laughing.
"Give me that back, you homo!" Penny said, snatching her phone from Leonard.
"Wow, this is quite a day for you. Gassy and bitchy," Leonard said, smirking.
"This isn't funny," Penny said, farting yet again.
Leonard laughed at Penny, pinching his nose.
"Did you go to the store to pick up some Gas-X?" Leonard asked.
"I went to every store that sells it. Everyone was inexplicably sold out. And I got about one hundred dirty looks from people who heard me fart," Penny said, erupting into tears.
"Don't worry about this. Your gas will eventually pass," Leonard said, laughing uproariously.
"Forget it. I don't know why I came to you for help. You were no help last year when I got explosive diarrhea on the same day I was supposed to shoot a commercial. And you're no help now," Penny said, getting up from the couch.
Penny strode to Leonards door and opened it, not bothering to shut it. Leonard stared at his open door, his mouth agape.
"Christ, it smells like a Mexican took a shit in here," Leonard said.
He then got up to shut the door.