Paradox
Note: Because I really should be working on at least one of the three essays that are due by this Thursday. Also, something written in present-tense? In one sitting? And there aren't any notes? What is the world coming to? Set in the F&M universe, sometime after "Lights Out."
"I hate you."
Jonathan has told her this before, and her response is always some variation of the same:
"I'm sorry."
As usual, he just shakes his head.
"I don't understand you. Nothing you do makes any sense."
She frowns.
"Whadd'ya mean? I make perfect sense. I never leave anything out like J. I don't talk in questions like Eddie. I don't bitch and expect you to know what I'm talking about like Red. And I don't just growl a bunch of three-word demands like the Bat. I'm always straightforward."
"That isn't what I meant," he says. "It's you. As a person, you do not make sense."
Blinking. Confusion.
"I'm sorry?"
A sigh, and he begins to list:
"You're sweet, you're cruel. You're beautiful and horrifying. You're intelligent and idiotic. Childlike and sadistic."
Harley grins widely.
"You think I'm horrifying?" She sounds delighted.
He shakes his head again.
"You're a walking paradox."
Although he, himself, isn't much better. After all, he hates her because he likes her.
"Mm," she hums in response. "But 'Paradox' is a lousy super-villain name."
Another sigh as he massages his temple, feeling a migraine beginning to pound there.
"I've seen you bash a guy's brains in with a ball-peen hammer, and then fall over yourself to help whenever I have a headache."
She smiles. Pretty. Terrible.
"I always find a way to get rid of 'em, don't I?"
"Yes," he agrees, feeling weary. "But you're what causes them."
Disclaimer: Oh, if only. But for their sakes, it's probably for the best.