This Is Not A Love Story
Prologue
"This is not a love story."
These are the words that have been scraped into the ceiling of my new Head Boy room. My box like dungeon. My brand new fucking home.
Below that,
"There are no happy endings."
Sometimes I think who the fuck carved this shit into here. A lot of times actually. Sometimes I wonder if it was my father, or just another kid like me. Because I have a lot of time on my hands to think about everything. Around here this is what passes as entertainment.
I wake up.
I think about her.
I eat.
I think about her.
I shower.
I think about her.
This is what my days and nights consist of.
This is my life.
My life.
I can't wake up and fuck some hot random girl anymore and get fucked up and it sucks but I have no one else to blame except myself. I made all of the decisions that led me to this point, if I did point a finger, I'd only be pointing at myself, and there's no need for that. No anymore. I'm well past that shit now.
But still, I sometimes catch my mind wandering around. Walking backward. I catch myself thinking about the things that happened and if I had just done this or that differently, I'd be in a different place right now.
Who knows where.
Maybe lying in bed next to my Rosie, bodies covered in sweat, holding onto her.
Rosie.
I always catch my mind racing back to her, especially to this one night in particular, Christmas night two years ago. This night jumps out because it was the night before I left to visit my parents, the trip where everything changed and flipped upside down for me. The night when Rose stood across from me and told me not to go. "Stay here the rest of your break and be with me."
No way, I told her. I've been stoked for this trip since like two months ago.
"Fine," she said. "Just go. Leave again."
Pulling my shirt off, I crawl into bed and look at the ceiling.
"This is not a love story."
I look below that.
"There are no happy endings."
-Scorpius Malfoy-