I wrote this for the HC-Bingo, on LJ. I just really love Rubi!
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Disclaimer: I don't own anything related to Once Upon a Time.
When The Full Moon Comes
The moon was full and Ruby was supposed to be hiding somewhere, covered by her red hood and praying to the gods for its magic to work. However, she didn't feel like hiding that night. She want to break free from the object that held her captive every full moon.
When she first discovered what she really was, she feared and loathed her wolf side. That other side of hers made her slaughter the one man she ever loved. After she met her mother, though, she learned how to love that wild part of her. She learned how to control the wolf, how to still be herself inside that other skin which also belonged to her.
Until her mother made her choose. She would have never been able to kill Snow White. Snow was her only friend in a time even she hated herself. Snow watched the blood bath Ruby was responsible for and still managed to hug her, consoling her for the loss she brought onto herself. She wouldn't be able to live with herself had she killed Snow.
This scenario created doubts inside her. From that time on, she would simultaneously love and hate her wolf side. She started using her restraining hood once again. She was in charge of herself, she was the one who would decide whether she wanted to change or not. No magical blood inheritance would govern how she lived.
And that was how she successfully lived until Storybrook happened. The cursed town ruined all of her self-control. Twenty eight years had passed with no magic working on the small town. But with Emma, hope had returned and with it came the magic. With magic, her wolf side came back. The girl she was in Storybrook knew nothing of that animal side, and for that, she paid a high price. By the time the first full moon showed itself on the sky of the city with rediscovered magic, Ruby feared the wolf again. Once again, she saw herself as a monster. An out of control killing monster. David had to show her she was wrong, just like Snow White had done so long ago.
That first night had passed, though, the moon completed yet another cycle, showing itself full and proud once more. This time, Ruby didn't want to hide. The loathing time had come and passed, and she caught herself longing to feel the bliss of running through the woods. While in her wolf form, she saw better, smelled better, heard better. She and the forest were one. When she was a wolf, no one was more powerful than her.
Finding a distant enough spot on the reduced forest surrounding the town, Ruby undid the knot of her hood, letting it fall to the ground. A shiver ran through her naked skin, and it wasn't for the natural chill of the night – it was an anticipation shiver.
Soon, the silver moonlight found its way through the trees' canopy to meet with her pale skin. If someone could see her, would seem like she was shining, as silver as her mother on the sky.
A burning feeling took control of her body, starting at her belly and spreading to all her extremities. When that invisible fire was over, she was already a wolf. She howled to the beautiful moon on the sky, thanking for the opportunity it now gave her.
Ruby was glad to be so lucid. Only in that form she really felt like herself. With her mind so clearly working on the wolf's skin, she felt like she was complete. That was what she really was – both human and wolf. Describing only one wouldn't be enough to fully comprehend who she was.
However, there were other reasons why she wanted so badly to be in more touch with her wild self. She had done something she wasn't proud of, and she just wanted to shove it aside, hiding it in some secret place of her mind.
In a moment of weakness, she had sex with Doctor Whale, no, Frankenstein. They were just talking, about the monstrous side each of them held close to the heart, and before she could realize what was really happening, his lips were on hers. Moving it to a bed was not difficult, especially inside a hospital.
Ruby had gone out of the hospital feeling ashamed of herself. Was she really that desperate? Was she feeling so lonely that she accepted the company of the first man that shared a bit of her problems and concerns? However, she knew the answers to those questions. Yes, she was that desperate. Yes, she was that lonely.
She had closed her heart completely after accidentally murdering her one true love. But a long time had passed ever since, and loneliness was finally creeping onto her heart, devouring her from the inside. No one, not even someone with her past, wanted to be alone forever.
Having sex with Doctor Whale wasn't the solution, though. Deep within her, she knew she would never have a love so strong as Snow and David's, but that was okay. She had a taste of it, and only a taste was enough to keep her going for a lifetime. What she really needed was company. Someone she could talk about anything and everything, someone who really understood her, someone that would make her scream of pleasure while sharing a bed.
Was that really too much to ask? She wasn't looking for true love, just for companionship. Doctor Whale might have been able to understand her, but their sex was just miserably bad. She admitted the situation wasn't the best, but their chemistry was pretty much non-existing – she was still trying to figure out how come they had ended up doing it anyway.
Remembering Snow's words about said man, maybe it was his fault after all. Maybe sex in his world was something of no importance. Or maybe he belonged to a place where woman were still sexually repressed. It hardly mattered.
Forcing her legs to their limits, she rushed even more through the forest, feeling the powerful wind on her face. That night wasn't about remembering. That night was about letting go.