I do not own Yu Yu Hakusho.

This was written so I wouldn't have to do my summer reading

First fanfiction I have written since I was 11.

Yukina, the ice maiden, the frozen child.

She was young, too young to have put up such walls between herself and the world. The circumstances of her birth were miserable. Losing a brother is traumatizing, but it is not uncommon. Not nearly bad enough to cause such a reaction. She wondered, she pondered, she supposed on why she was like this. Why her heart was made of the coldest stone. Why she didn't feel happiness when she supposed she should. Why she didn't know what happiness was.

Yukina imagined she should have been happy because her life was spared, that she was safe on the island- away from the evils of men. But still, she felt nothing. It disturbed even the emotionless Koorime tribe. Why the young girl would not laugh nor cry. They would taunt her, beat her, do the most horrible things to her.

"she shared a womb with the imiko," They would whisper "she is tainted, that is why she is broken. Why she is not like us."

Yukina learned early on that she must act. Put on a mask or joy or sadness, to hide her heart that was broken not from sadness, but from nothingness. She learned when to laugh, to smile, to cry, or to shout in anger or fear. Eventually that mask she had adorned when she was just a young child had become her own face. Even when alone, she would pretend she cared for the birds- what she supposed she should call her only friends. Yukina knew she should feel something, anything for the gentle animals that would come to comfort her. Sometimes she would pretend to be infuriated with herself, that she was frustrated with her lack of progress.

When she was older, she supposed that maybe her twin had stolen that other half of her, the half that cared for people who were not herself. Maybe if she found him, she would feel something. Maybe if he was there, she would love him and he would love her. Maybe he could tell her what love is supposed to feel like, and if she was doing it right.

Her search proved futile when she was captured almost immediately. Put in a cell to cry. Even then, she would pretend. She would react how the man wanted out of fear- the only thing she had ever felt. She would cry when he made a good enough effort. Occasionally, her mask would slip, and she would forget to cry, forget to scream, and he would do something worse to make her remember.

Then came those boys, the ones who would "save" her. She paid little attention when she was taken to watch the first two die for her. She did not care if they died. They came in vain. They were not important. But Yukina's mask hid all this. She screamed for them. Against all odds they did not die.

Then he came. Her savior, her love, her only. The small boy, dressed in black. She knew exactly who he was. Something strange had happened in her chest- it felt like a tightness around her heart, a desperation to hold him close- shield him from the world and it would be them and them alone. But her mask could not fall yet- Yukina pleaded for her captor, so her brother, dearest brother, would not think her cruel. He said he knew the two who had come to save her, and he was gone.

Months passed, one of the two boys –the ugly one- would visit. At his presence, she felt another emotion, irritation. He was not the right man! He was not her Hiei, her perfect, beautiful brother. She knew why he did not speak to her, why he would protect her from himself. Yukina loved him for it, she knew that's what the burning in her stomach must be, what the heaviness in her heart must be. She loved him. She loved him. She loved him.

The dark tournament came, and Yukina jumped at the chance to see him, fight. To see him at all actually. Kuwabara would try to keep her away from him. Say he was mean or evil. Again of her limited emotional range, she felt the irritation.

Then there was the fox. And another emotion. Hate. She hated how he would talk to easily to him. How her brother would confide in the fox rather than her. But most of all she hated how, when they thought no one was looking, they would steal kisses. How when they though she was asleep, the two demons would sneak away in the middle of the night to do god knows what. Yukina hated Kurama with all her heart for stealing him away from her. She would secretly cheer when Kurama would almost die in battle and she would feel that same anger when he was fine.

After the tournament, he would come to check on her. And Yukina's life had become a blur. When he was gone she felt, for the first time in her life, sad. When he was there her heart would jump and she would feel that desperate pressure to steal him away. She would hint to him about how she "missed her brother" hoping he would put it all together. He didn't.

Years passed, another tournament, and one more person to hate- Mukuro. But she did not last.

Yukina could stand it no longer. These games, the hinting, and half-truths. The jealousy as her brother spent more and more time with the cursed fox- even meeting his human mother- grew and grew. She needed Him, her Hiei, to leave them. Become hers alone. By any means, even if that meant stealing him away.

Curling her fingers around Hiei's, Yukina smiled. He stared blankly ahead. They were far away from the humans that had tainted her brother's heart. The humans that had taken some of the love that only Yukina should have. They were in a frozen corner of the Makai, far from even the Koorime, in the tundra that Yukina loved. They had come to visit Kurama, who was long been frozen in a huge block of enchanted ice- unmoving for hundreds of years- red hair suspended and eyes shut in what appeared to be slumber. Yukina could not have killed this one without losing her brother in the process, so Kurama is frozen… with her dear brother's heart.