()()()

It had started that night they left the CDC.

No – perhaps even before that… when he had handed her that pickaxe and she sent it through the dead brain of that red-neck slime she had once called a husband.

Maybe even before then.

The way she walked, the way she moved, how she spoke to people without ever losing sight of that scumbag. She was a woman living in fear and since the moment Daryl had laid eyes on Carol Peletier he had known; she was afraid of Ed. But more than that, she was afraid of what he would do to her daughter.

Daryl recognised it; hell, he was attuned to that sort of thing.

Letting her finish him off was almost cathartic. Hearing the tear of flesh, the slop of blood and brain and thunk of the metal as it embedded in the ground made him think of her liberation… he could almost see the devil exorcised from within her.

Daryl watched her grow in the new light of freedom.

And she dazzled; he found it almost mesmerising.

So when she lost her daughter he was prepared to do anything.

Daryl Dixon would do anything so that she would be saved from losing that spark.

He prayed; he had actually prayed.

Never prayed for nothin' in my whole life before, he explained to God that night she cried herself to sleep in Dales motorhome. Figured my old man was right… figured you had more important people to listen to. Way I hear it told… we all got our own quota of miracles to be had by you…

Daryl squeezed his eyes shut, What I have give to her.

What I have, let Sophia take. Let her be safe.

The night was silent, save for Carols sobs…

Let her be safe and come home to her momma.

Nothing.

Please…

Absolutely nothing.

And Daryl couldn't take it anymore, Fine then!

But when he sat up all he could see was Carol curled in a painful little ball on the bed, soaking the pillow with sorrow as she cried for her daughter.

Looking back, he saw Andrea endlessly clicking and snapping that damned gun of hers…

In truth, he had hardly noticed the other woman

And then he figured… he figured that people get lost and survive all the time… so what was he doing lying here when Sophia was out there?

"I'm gonna walk the road," he informed Andrea, "look for the girl."

And the crying stopped…

When Daryl looked back he saw Carol wiping away her tears… and there it was; that glimmer of hope in her eye…

And he nodded to her, hoping to convey assurance, or understanding… or something, anything that would bring her peace.

So Daryl went out tracking. It was something he was used to; something he knew. Who would have thought it would end up saving his life when the world turned upside-down. Maybe it could save Sophias life as well.

And even with Andrea tagging along beside him, distracting him and asking questions, Daryl was still no closer to finding the little girl.

The look on Carols face when they returned to the camp without her daughter was almost too much to bear… so Daryl was glad when Dale and Andrea didn't follow him into the Winnebago.

He stood there a moment, listening to Carol crying again, and tried to find the words… but all he could manage was a mumbled, "Sorry…"

"What?" Carol asked, sitting up and looking at him.

The attention made him squirm… "I said, I'm sorry."

And though the sobs continued to shake through her, Carol wiped away her tears and cocked her head in confusion, "Why are you sorry?"

Why was he sorry? He was supposed to be the tracker in this rag-tag group! He was supposed to be the one that could read the forest and the woodland and guide them all to safety… this apocalypse was a chance for him to be a valued member of society instead of the miscreant he had always been told he would become… and for all of this… "I couldn't find her."

"She's my daughter," Carol corrected, "I should never have let her out of my sight." And she shifted to sit on the end of the bed, better to see him and say, "It wasn't your fault I left her alone on the road to be chased away… I'm her mother… I should have been there…"

And before he knew it she was wrapped in his arms, crying against the leather of his jacked as he held her tightly, soothing, "You couldn't help it, it all happened so fast…"

But she shook her head, "I could have done something… but I was so scared!"

What was he hearing? Of course she was scared; they were all scared! So he moved to hold her face in his hands and look in her eyes, "It was only natural… ain't nobody in this camp not afraid of them…"

"But we're together," Carol said, fighting back the tears in her eyes as Daryl wiped at them, "and she's alone…"

There was something he could do, "I'll go back out…"

And as he moved away, he felt Carols hand on his arm, "No! You need your sleep and it's too dark…"

So?

"Will you help me look in the morning?"

Daryl nodded dumbly, unable to find a counter argument; it was dark and the chances of following a trail would be better in the day. And, as much as he hated to admit it, he needed the rest.

"Do you think you'll be able to sleep," he asked her.

Carol shrugged, looking between the bed and him.

"You need to rest up so we can find your little girl…"

She nodded… "Will you stay with me?"

That went without asking; there was nowhere he intended to be… so as she climbed back into the bed, Daryl looked about the cramped RV for a place to settle close to her.

"No'" Carol said.

And when Daryl looked up he saw her shifting over in the covers…

"I mean here…"

Fear gripped his centre… if it hadn't been so cold and unwanted, he may have found the thought of facing a hundred walkers less frightening than the prospect of this woman wanting to share her bed with him an amusing notion…

But the look in her eye banished all fear; she needed him.

And Daryl needed to be needed…

So he moved to the bed, kicking off his boots and gently shifting in next to her, letting her drape his arm over her shoulders so he lay on his back as she cuddled into his side.

Mad world, he thought as he felt the warm body next to him relax and heard her breathing even out.

Mad, insane world… and he tried not to think of how comforting and enjoyable the feeling of holding her was…

We'll find Sophia in the morning, he confirmed, drowsily, we're going to find her…

And then he fell to sleep…

()()()()

Light crept in beneath his eyelids… Daryl must have slept a whole six hours straight, because when he woke he was alert and ready for the day; hadn't rested that good since he'd stayed with those respite folk out in Fulton County…

In fact… he felt so damned good that he figured he might linger a while and let his body acclimatise to consciousness.

Daryl couldn't remember the last time he luxuriated in bed, feeling the suns warmth through the windows, wallowing in the comfort of a mattress, breathing in the scent of…

"Carol?"

He opened his eyes.

()()()

Daryl needed space; he needed to think on it.

So he had taken the chance to range the forest in search of Sophia once more, leaving Carol at the highway to wait in case she should appear.

Space…

He had gotten too close to Carol over the past few days. Man! He could be a jerk sometimes! Woman just lost her daughter… and there he was… what the hell was he doing?

It started out as an odd need; he hadn't expected to ever feel…

Shit! Merles voice taunted him in his head, Don't go tellin' me you got yourself a little school-boy crush now, little brother.

"Shut up!" Daryl instructed the voice in his mind and pushed, deeper into the woodland.

You have, haven't you?! Merle chuckled a dirty, loathful sound…

Daryl tried to shrug it off… and failed.

You there messin' your pants over Mrs Priss… Merle chortled, Like she'd ever loosen up enough to suck you off, even.

"Hey!" Daryl snapped, "Don't you go talkin' on her like that!"

Dry, old dutchess ain't never gonna let you even suck a titty and you-

"Enough!"

Birds scattered from the tree above him as he whirled about, pointlessly; knowing the voice of his brother was only the worst part of himself…

Still… Merle remained silent.

And good riddance.

Daryl spotted a clearing with a house and made his way toward it…

Damn! He had to get his head straight.

But even this – even searching like this… why was he out in the middle of nowhere?

Was it any better than being back there?

He'd always been on the outskirts of everything; couldn't connect.

So what was he doing with Carol?

Why couldn't he seem to leave her alone?

He'd been so mixed up in thinking about staying the night in the Winnebago that he had almost gone on autopilot… moving through the house and spotting the signs that there had been someone there before he had arrived… a very small someone…

Could it be..?

And as he left the house with a new hope filling his heart he saw them… white roses…

God! She was alive… she had to be!

He had to get back and tell Carol!