He was a lost child, most days he spent alone in his white robes that represented the 'Teutonic Knights'. He barely knew what that meant, hell, his first memory was seeing his Vati fade off into the distance.
It was no surprise that he was constantly abused, hit, and lectured by his 'superiors', not to mention the lack of support, food and well-being he really got. He was forced to grow up at the age of eight. How was he really supposed to get by?
All he longed for, was for someone to love him, someone to make him feel wanted. He knew of his relative, Holy Roman Empire, but he'd never seen much of him. His years had been so lonely, he was nothing but a mere child-puppet that was manipulated by the 'adults'.
He covered it all up, though.
Acting like he was 'awesome' and 'superior' to everyone else seemed to be the best defence mechanism for such a small child. His attitude probably got him into more trouble, than it did good, but at least it kept him strong.
Not once had he shed a tear in his hard-given life. Despite the loneliness and forced-wars he was put into, he still kept a stern, hard face. Nobody scared him.
But yet, nobody feared him, he was viewed as a 'small' and 'weak' nation.
He slammed the backdoor to the place he was currently staying in. As per usual, his 'boss' and 'higher ups' were out drinking, so he was left alone, to do nothing.
Besides, he didn't fancy sticking around to face their abuse when they came back drunk.
He wandered through the backgarden, it was quite big, but he wasn't looking for a place to sit and rest, no. His scarlet eyes scanned the forest behind it, and he trudged towards it, taking in the peaceful atmosphere.
Really, this was the only place he could truly go to get away from everything, and just be, human, as odd as it sounded. He hated being a nation, he wanted a normal childhood like all of the other kids in the villages and towns that he's seen, but he knows he'll never get that.
He didn't have any real friends, everyone was either shaken by his appearance, or thought he was a loser, an outcast. It wasn't his fault he had white hair and red eyes.
He hated himself, he really did, he just let everyone walk over him. He was worthless, pathetic. There was no way he was going to live past his teen years at this rate.
He'd just fade, like his Vati did...
Looking up, he noticed he was finally at his 'clearing'. He took in the pure beauty around him, red flowers scattered around the area, reflecting the piercing colour of his eyes, while the contrasting, white daisies littered themselves, infecting the bloody atmosphere.
He sat down on his favorite log.
He'd sit, and just hum to himself, taking in the flower-scented air.
He wondered into thought, What would it be like to be loved?
Some people said that love was one of the most beautiful things in the world, but could a nation, like himself, really be prone and able to use this beautiful thing?
He pouted, of course not. He was weak, useless, there was no way that such a pathetic existing nation as himself could learn to like someone, nevermind love them. Maybe there was a reason everyone was so cold to him, he probably deserved it.
His first memory was, after all, his Vati fading away. Why did his Vati fade away? Was it all his fault? Is that why it's his first memory?
Maybe that's why he lived such a hardship of a life, he deserved it for murdering his own father.
He started visibly shaking, and for the first time in his life, he let a tear roll down his cheek.
He murdered his own father, the person who brought him into this world. Why else would he fade? It was his fault! This is why he would never love, this is why he would never have anyone by his side!
He let out a muffled sob, as he buried his face into his sleeve. He gripped onto his arm, but winced, remembering he had a big bruise there from being slammed into a wall.
Bringing his knees up, he closed his eyes, and continued to cry. It wasn't okay to cry, it was a sign of weakness, but he just couldn't help himself.
He was so lonely. He wanted to be loved.
"Wh-Why c-can't... a-anyone l...ove t-the awesome-me?..." Gilbert sounded out, quietly, not expecting a response from anyone.
But he did get a response.
"Anyone is able to be loved, they just need to open up to the right person."
Prussia's head shot up, and he found the owner of the voice. A boy, looked about the same age as him, had light blonde hair, and bright emerald eyes. His eyebrows stood out the most, they were quite... bushy for his age, and the boy had a strange aura about him.
"H-Huh?..." He wiped the tears away immediately, "Wh-Who are you?..." He asked, waiting for a response from the boy.
"I'm England, or, Arthur Kirkland. Who are you?"
"I-I'm the Teutonic Knights, or, also known as, Gilbert Beilschmidt..." He mumbled, just loud enough for the Brit to hear.
England smiled and crouched down to the white haired boy. "Tell me what's got you all upset, Gilbert."
"Why should I?!" The Prussian flipped out a bit, outraged by the sudden... kindness.
"Because, to be honest, I don't usually find boys crying in the middle of forests." He swiftly replied, touching the boy's arm, which made him wince slightly, because it was where he had a bruise.
"Oh, okay..." The Prussian hesitated before blurting out, "Nobody loves me."
Arthur looked confused at first, but then somewhat understood what he meant, "Oh..."
"Y-Yeah... I've never had a true childhood, I was forced to mature too early, and I'm always abused. Nobody truly cares or loves me, they just use me to get what they want..."
This time, the Brit hesitated, but soon made up his mind and hugged the Prussian. Gilbert looked up, teary eyed... He'd never truly felt 'affection' before.
"Wh-what are you doing?!" He asked, slightly panicked, expecting Arthur to backstab him or turn evil, but instead, he just stayed there.
"Me and you are quite similar, y'know, mate. I've never really been loved. The closest to a friend I've had is the Frog that lives across the English channel, not to mention my brothers don't really care for me, and are always getting into wars with me. I-I've also been prone to 'abuse' from the higher ups, I'm just a puppet to them."
He finished his small speech and pulled back, looking the puffy eyed albino in the eye, "If you want, I can be your friend..."
The small white-haired boy smiled a bit and hugged Arthur, "Really?! That's so awesome! I-I've never had a friend before, Artie!"
The Brit cringed a bit at the nickname, but decided to let it slip, besides, that's what 'friends' did, right?
Arthur stood up properly, "Come on, let's go play!"
Gilbert laughed, "Kesesesese~! Okay! Tag, you're it!" He reached forward and tapped the Brit on the arm, who immediately became flustered.
"Hey! You bloody git, you didn't even give me time to-" But before he knew it, the albino was running, so he chased after him.
Both boys continued to chase eachother, this was the first time they met, and the start of a very strong friendship.
24th January, 1992.
Arthur Kirkland sighed as he got off the plane in Berlin. Really, when he thought about it, he was just the same as he was in his childhood. Abandoned, and lonely. His strong empire was no more, and he could seriously feel the effects of being weakened.
He dragged his small suitcase along with him, and went to customs. He thought long and hard, about the reason of him coming back to Germany...
FLASHBACK
February 25, 1947
Alfred F. Jones stood at the front of the disorganized conference room, next to him stood Gilbert Beilschmidt, or, also known as, Prussia.
The Brit fidgeted in his seat, very unsure about the idea to be discussed, and possibly made official on this day. He looked over, noticing Francis feeling the same tension that he was, and he whispered over to him, "Do you think he'll really dissolve Prussia?"
Francis struggled to answer that question, "I really don't know, but I hope he's not too harsh on notre belle Prussia..."
Arthur sighed, and looked back to Alfred, who stood with much seriousness in his eyes. It frightened the Brit to no bounds, he'd never seen him like this.
Yao sat across with Ivan, they both too, were whispering things into eachother's ears, but they looked like they were having a laugh. Ludwig was also in the room, sat with his head in his hands, looking very stressed.
"Alright, be quiet." The American ordered, silencing the room, "I've come to a decision, and even though this may..." He thought about his words, "Hurt a few people, it's very necessary."
Ludwig's head snapped up, and he looked almost pleadingly at the American, but he continued.
"I'm sorry to say, but, the Kingdom of Prussia is no more, and neither is the state. Prussia will now be named 'East Germany', no exceptions. Prussia is meaningless and worthless, it's only a matter of time before he, himself dies out." His harsh words bit through the atmosphere, clawing at the Prussian's emotions, and making Ludwig flinch.
Gilbert finally looked up, "If that's how it is, then so be it. You're all fucking useless anyway, a bunch of snobby countries who think you know everything just because you won the war. You killed just as many as we did."
Alfred laughed, "Yeah, but at least we didn't kill our own kind. You've got your 'wonderful BRUDER' to thank for that." The venom slipped off his tongue, cutting deep into Gilbert.
The Prussian almost swung for him, but he was stopped by Arthur getting up and holding him back. Gilbert looked up at the Brit, with slight betrayal and tears forming in his eyes.
Arthur really wanted to comfort him, he really did. He wanted to let him know that he was sorry, for everything... But he couldn't. Not here. He was the United Kingdom, there was no way in hell he could let his guard down in front of the powerful nations around him. He was insecure himself, it wouldn't do him any good if he broke down here for the Prussian.
And that was that. Arthur let go of him when he calmed down, and he stormed out with Ludwig following close behind. Eventually, Francis walked out, and so did he, leaving Yao, Ivan and Alfred behind to most likely, mock Prussia's existance.
FLASHBACK END
Arthur sighed as he got out of his car, which was parked outside of Ludwig and Gilbert's house. That was why he was here, wasn't it?
He wanted to apologize.
Slamming the car door shut, he walked up to the house and rung the doorbell shakily.
"Was?" Ludwig Beilschmidt stood in front of him. He'd not seen him for a few years, really, but that was besides the point, he wasn't here for the German.
"Ah, good day Ludwig. I need to speak with your brother, is he home?" The Brit said in one of the most polite tones he could use.
Ludwig scowled slightly, remembering the hell that the Allies put him through. Not only did they turn Prussia into 'East Germany', they gave him to Russia, one of the most cruel nations on the planet. "Why do you want to speak to him?"
The Brit fidgeted with his fingers and looked down shamefully, "I-I... I want to apologize to him..." He mumbled quietly.
The German was surprised, to say the least, but he nodded, and let Arthur into the house.
Arthur sat down on the couch in the lounge, and waited patiently. He could faintly smell wurst and beer, which was typical, to say the least.
His eyes cast downwards, but he heard the door open, and looked up, green eyes meeting red.
Gilbert was wary, but he moved over to the couch and sat down next to England, "So, what do you want from the awesome-me?~" He piped up in his usual better-than-you tone.
Arthur stared at him for a few seconds, but then spoke up.
"I'm sorry."
Gilbert looked confused, and was about to say something, but he was quickly interupted.
"I'm sorry for not keeping our friendship, I'm sorry for leaving you, I'm sorry for abandoning you... I should of stayed by your side, and ignored the status of my own country, but... everything was so messed up, Gil. My own empire has fallen, and I'm alone. No one ever visits me anymore, and I can't even hold onto my newer friends, nevermind older ones. I've become such a selfish person, caring for nothing but my own needs, and that's why I didn't help you, and I'm so fucking sorry for that."
By now, Arthur was almost in tears, and Gilbert looked over at him, taking in everything he said, before speaking himself.
"Listen, Artie... I forgive you, for everything. W-we're in the same boat again, really. I don't have an empire anymore, and I always find myself arguing with West nowadays. Most of my friends don't care to stop by, and you're the first person truly willing to speak to me since the wall came down." His voice lowered completely, and he mumbled, "Th-thanks for coming by..."
Arthur smiled a bit, and moved forward, embracing the Prussian in front of him, "You git, I've been so worried about you..."
Gilbert let out a small laugh, "Kesese~! Well, of course you have been, it's the awesome-me we're talking about."
Arthur punched him softly on the arm, and found himself on his lap, "You bigheaded oath!"
Gilbert smirked and moved forward, pressing his lips to Arthur's softly. The Brit became a bit flustered and froze, but closed his eyes and deepened the kiss.
Then, Gilbert pulled away, "Arthur Kirkland, ich liebe dich."
Arthur blushed and replied back in a low voice, "Gilbert Beilschmidt, I love you too..."
Arthur wrapped his arms around Gilbert's neck, and rested his head on his chest for a few moments, and they stayed there. Thinking about their lives, but most of all, thinking about eachother.
Alright! That's that done. This was just, out of the blue, really. I felt like I needed to write SOMETHING, since I'm on slight writer's block with The German Exchange. Do not fear though, I am working on it, and trying my best. Ideas and suggestions would be nice for the next chapter.
I hope you enjoyed this as much as I enjoyed writing it. I effing love PrUK, and... I just thought they'd of grown up together. Please review~