A/N: New TV-show, new pairing, new challenge. Eheh probably the sweetest, most bittersweet couple I have ever tried. I POSITIVELY ADORE Mark, and Lexie is the perfect, sweet, caring girl he needs. I was SO mad when they broke up, but then I realized it "spikes up the punch", if you know what I mean?
I wrote this after listening to Ronan Keating's "If tomorrow never comes", a song I deeply recommend!
Lexie was crying. She actually had tears strolling down her cheeks, watery eyes and a trembling lip. He remembered the first sob. And he remembered hating himself for having caused it. But most of all, he remembered regretting having done nothing to comfort her. He let her run away, and the reason why… well, that he failed to understand. It hurt, and it would take time to heal, but that was not the reason. He did not wipe her tears, and he did not tell her everything would be alright. And even if he preferred to let the outside world to think otherwise, he knew he did not hold her in her place due to a very frightening emotion he had lacked during most of his life and had paralyzed his muscles, nerves and heart.
The fact it hurt so much, the fact it had silently warned him it would take him a long time, if not forever, to heal, and the fact he simply failed to grasp the concept of letting go scared him. Terrified him to a point where his defense skills took over his mind and controlled his actions. Mark Sloan feared Little Grey. And he knew the reason why. That much pain, that much hatred towards those who she replaced him with, that much bitterness could only mean one thing. He was in love. Deeply, madly, girlishly in love with Lexie. And if such verdict was indeed true… that story would suffer from the lack of a happy ending. That was just how things worked with him. Nothing went according to plan, there was always a way for it to backfire on him. And a love story, like those he saw in the movies, was more likely to end tragically. Just like Addison's did. And just like Lexie's did.
Why did it hurt so much more when Lexie was in the picture? It had never been that much with the other girls.
Maybe it was because he had told her he loved her, and then they went their separate ways. Or maybe it had something to do with the fact they had lived together, sharing everything only to have that everything cruelly taken away from them.
Mark did not know. He only knew two things: he loved that girl, and the strength of such an already powerful emotion was as great as he had never encountered before, and did not believe he would ever again; and he was standing in front of Derek's house, having rang twice, dangerously close to withdrawing cowardly.
He heard footsteps. The somewhat translucent door announced his friend's arrival, a surprised, yet concerned, look on his face.
"Mark?" He let him in. "What are you doing here?" He motioned for the couch and waved to the coat-hanger. Mark threw his leather jacket onto the ground. "Or you could leave it there." Derek spoke, condescending. Still bewildered, he had the faint notion Mark had heard none of his words.
He put a hand on his shoulder, forcing him to stare at him in the eyes. They were unfocused, and he wore a confused expression.
"I'm thinking." He said. "Okay? I'm thinking."
"Oh, okay, then, if you're thinking." A weak trace of sarcasm in his voice was enough to wake Mark.
"I am, I am. Do you have a problem with that?" He furrowed his eyebrows in abrupt anger.
"No, no. God, Mark. Calm down." Derek snapped, shaking him slightly.
"Well, but I do. I have a problem with that." He confessed, eyes fixed on the floor. "I am thinking, and I know the answer, but someone took the question away from me. Does that make any sense?" He asked, a fierce sparkle in his eyes. "At all?"
Uncertain of what to say, he opted for a non committal grunt.
"Because now that I know the answer, I know I ruined it, too. And I don't have the question. And without the question, I can't possibly make it up to her." He sighed and sat on the floor, glaring at Derek when he did not immediately follow him.
"Oh." Realization hit him. He fought the urge to smile. Or giggle, even, as embarrassing as it would have sounded. Mark Sloan had grown up. "Lexie, come down here a second." He called, his head turned to the side.
Mark's eyes jerked up. Panicking, he covered Derek's mouth with his hand, before the latter raised his eyebrows to show him how pathetic his attitude was. He surrendered.
"Lexie!" He called again.
Mark prepared himself. What was he going to say? Did she still have his second chance stored somewhere in her heart? Did he deserve one after rejecting her sincere apologies? Talk about hypocritical…
"Coming, comin-" Light footsteps, unlike Derek's, were her give-away. Lazily, with a tissue in one hand, Lexie strolled down the stairs, stopping at the sight of the two men sitting on the wooden floor, one of them fidgeting nervously, the other smiling. "M- Mark?"
He looked up, fearfully. He did not want his not so bright future to arrive so quickly, he wanted to keep on thinking he still had a chance. He could not look straight into her eyes, fearing what might have been mirrored in them. He, then, chose to focus on her freckles. "Hi."
"What're… have y-" She mumbled incoherently.
"My cue to leave." Derek said, suddenly, pleasantly. "Work this out, kids." He got up with great effort, massaging his back. "You know, that's why we've got couches." Both of them ignored him, and he proceeded into the kitchen. "Meredith, what's for dinner?" His words were smothered by the closing of the door, leaving only silence behind.
Awkward silence. Inquiring, self explaining, awkward silence. A very difficult one to break.
"I guess I should… probably… be go-" Lexie stuttered, unsure of what to say without letting out the imminent tears.
"What do you do when you found a questionless answer?" Mark asked in a sudden, an inquiring frown on his face, stopping her mid rant.
"Huh… does that even exist?" A sob and a chuckle reached his ears at the same time.
Mark allowed himself to face her, and let her grey eyes find their way into his. "Probably not." He smiled. "But even then, what do you do?"
"Hum…" Lexie walked down the stairs, hesitant, and sat in front of him. "I would find the question?" A puzzled grin enriched her delicate features.
"Check." He played with his fingers, failing to recall the last time he had been that nervous. "And what then?"
"I don't know, Mark… I…" She sighed profoundly, tiredly. He could tell just him being there hurt her as much as it hurt him. "I just…"
"Would you tell her the answer?"
"I guess, if we are not being literal here." An attempt of a true smile flourished on her lips.
"We're not. Lexie…" She flinched at the sound of her name. "Okay, here it goes." He inhaled heavily. "Because I was an egotistical, hypocritical, ungrateful bastard."
"That's the answer?" She smiled shyly.
"One of them. They are three, you know." He murmured, as if it were a secret.
"What's this one's question?"
"How could I ever leave you?" A furious sigh left his mouth without previous warning and he passed a hand through his hair.
A tear rolled down her cheek.
"Yes."
"And that one?"
"The question I only dared to ask myself once, because I knew there was no truer answer than that one." She crawled closer to him, and he laid his arm on her tiny shoulders protectively. "Are you the one for me? That one I knew the moment I saw you climbing down those stairs, you know, Little Grey?" She snuggled deeper, her head resting on his chest.
"And the third one?"
"That one…" She felt him smiling. "I have the question, but I don't have the answer."
"Who does?" Her hand caressed his shirt gently.
"You." He pulled her chin upwards and gazed at the beautiful girl his arms were wrapped around. "Will you… will you consider marrying me, Lexie?"
A/N: So, what did you guys think? I know, fluffy, but the thing is, the fact they are broken up, while I understand the series' POV, makes me utterly mad, and I just had to write their happy ending, you know? Or not… That's the beauty of this fic. It can either be a ONE-SHOT, or a TWO-SHOT. If you want me to turn this into a two-shot, let me know. If you don't, well, you can always think she said yes… ahah
Review, pretty please?