Timeline note: Set sometime before the move to San Francisco.
With a sigh, Sadness got up from her chair and dejectedly looked up at the dark screen. Dream Productions had camera problems again tonight, and it resulted in only bits and pieces of the movies getting through. This happened on a frequent basis, and no matter who was up that night, it always made Dream Duty even duller than usual. In fact, had Anger been the one awake right now, it would have sent him into a fit of rage; this kind of thing always set him off, and he had actually woken the rest of them a few times over it.
Sadness felt her features crease into a small frown as she massaged one tired shoulder. There really was no sense in making Riley feel anything in this kind of situation, so until the studio had gotten their technical problems sorted out, Sadness's presence at the console was not required.
Her steps echoed in the silence as she scuffed her feet on the way over to the lockers. The door of her small one creaked as she opened it, and she halted, listening for any indication that it might have woken someone. But everything seemed peaceful, except for the slight static from the still black screen. If she concentrated, she could make out a faint mumbling from the Sleeping Quarters on the upper level, but that was okay; both Joy and Anger were sleep-talkers.
Sighing again, she turned back to her open locker and rummaged in the small box of green tea bags that Fear had given her a while back, but then found that there was only one left. She pulled it out and quietly held it in her hand for a moment.
She could sure use a cup of tea right now; it would keep her awake and enable her to properly enjoy the boredom and monotony. But she vividly recalled him saying that he'd run out on his last night shift, worrying about when he'd be able to get a new supply, so with a small smile, she closed both hands around it and made her way up the ramp and over to the Sleeping Quarters instead.
When she entered the small space from which their five doors branched off, she paused for a moment and listened for unusual disturbances again, then crossed the short distance to Fear's room. There was shuffling on the other side of his door, and a few small thumps, but it was okay; it was nothing out of the ordinary.
She knew that. After all, this wasn't the first time she had entered the others' rooms at night to check on them. She liked watching them sleep. Nighttime was when they were the most honest with themselves.
She gently pushed the door open with both hands, still clutching the tea bag, and sure enough, she found Fear wheezing to himself, jerking his head this way and that, hands curled into fists so tightly that it seemed only a matter of time until he would rip the blanket clutched in his stiff fingers.
She took the few steps over to his bed and gently placed the tea bag down on his nightstand, then turned to just look at him for a moment.
Fear was always tossing and turning. His sleep was ever fitful, and it was rare for him to get a full night of rest. Even when Sadness sat at the console doing her job, she'd occasionally be startled out of her misery by one of his screams, because every now and then, something would cause him to jerk awake and pant as if he'd been running.
On the rare occasion that Sadness was actually in the room when it happened, her presence always managed to reassure him enough that he would settle down again, snuggling back into his blanket in a remarkably peaceful slumber, and one of her most treasured memories - her own, not Riley's - was that one time when she had found him crying, sitting curled up on the floor, rocking back and forth. She had sat down next to him, then, and had put her arm around his shoulders, and whatever he had dreamed about that had upset him - he'd never told her - had been driven from his mind as her silent support and comfort had managed to help him get through it, to help him calm down enough to dare try getting back to sleep.
It had been one of the few times in her life that had made her feel powerful.
Smiling to herself again as she mentally returned to the present, she quietly laid one hand onto his cheek, and almost immediately, his features relaxed a little and his breathing slowed down into something that sounded slightly more healthy. She carefully pried the blanket from his hands as the nervous energy left his fingers, and then drew it all the way up to his shoulders.
There, that was better. He'd get through the night like this.
On her way out of the room, she almost bumped into Anger.
"Camera problems?" he guessed, slightly rubbing one tired eye as they left the Sleeping Quarters together, and she nodded in reply.
"Can't they hire professionals already?" he growled as they descended the ramp, but then frowned at her a little. "What are you doing up here?"
"Just checking on Fear," she mumbled, wringing her hands as she tried to match her small, tentative steps to his large strides.
"Having another conniption fit again, huh?" Anger grumbled, but his gruffness didn't fool her in the slightest, and indeed she caught him smiling as he disappeared into one of the branching corridors.
Roaming Headquarters at night would make him even grumpier in the morning, she mused as she sat back down on her chair to stare up at the still dark screen. But she knew he tended to wake up at night to get himself a glass of water. He would always grumble and growl in his sleep, low enough that it wasn't quite discernible, but loud enough that he sometimes woke himself up with the noise.
Those were the times when he would go and get that glass of water. He had once mentioned to her that the temperature in Headquarters seemed perpetually too warm to him, and even though Sadness realized that it was probably his own excessive body heat making him feel that way, the water seemed to help him cool down, and over time, his nightly wanderings had eventually become a habit.
When she heard his footsteps again, she turned her head to smile at him a bit.
"Has anything gotten through tonight?" he asked as he came to stand next to her to also look up at the screen, and indeed, he was sipping at a glass of water.
"I've seen Riley fly through a starry night sky on a hockey racket," Sadness provided, her smile dimming a little when she remembered how quickly the console's yellow glow had faded tonight. "She would've loved that one."
Anger didn't look at her as he kept sipping his water, but there was some sort of affirmative growl in the back of his throat. "Well, try not to get too bored," he finally answered, and with a nod, he turned and retreated up the ramp.
Sadness focused most of her attention back on the blank screen, but she kept listening until his footsteps had faded and his door had softly clicked shut.
So it was just her and the void again. With a sigh, she slumped back against the chair's backrest. If she closed her eyes, she could see herself sitting… well, right where she was, staring into mid-air all night, desperately trying not to fall asleep. If something did get through, someone needed to watch it so that they would know if there was anything that would bother Riley in the morning.
Not that anything bad was likely to happen tonight. Her day had been mostly pleasant, overall, and Joy had been firmly in charge. …well, Joy was in charge almost every day, but they all wanted Riley to be happy, so that was probably good, kinda, even if it did cut down on the time the rest of them could spend with their girl. As long as Riley didn't need her input, Sadness didn't mind staying on the sidelines.
But there had also been many green memories today. Riley's parents had invited an old friend of Dad's over for dinner, and he and his wife had brought their dog, and while it had been a really cute dog and very well-behaved, it had been raining all day, so the dog had been all muddy and wet and had kept shaking the water out of its fur. Sadness hadn't been sure whom to pity more, the dog for the horrible situation it was in, or Disgust because she had barely been able to do her job.
The soft sound of pearling laughter pulled Sadness out of her reverie, and when she looked up at the screen, she saw Riley dancing through a wide field full of flowers, laughing as the dog ran after her, and she shrieked in delight when it managed to throw her to the ground and then proceeded to lick her face.
Sadness found herself smiling at the pure bliss in Riley's eyes, and sure enough, the console had returned to its bright, yellow glow. But it lasted only for a moment until the connection was broken again, and with a horrible screeching noise that had her flinch, the yellow light winked out and the display on the screen went back to static.
Sadness raised her head and stayed completely still, trying to pick up on any sounds reaching her from the Sleeping Quarters. But if anyone had been startled awake, it didn't seem as if they were moving around.
Well, she supposed it didn't matter. Judging by how long she had been sitting here already, Riley would probably wake up soon, and that would give Dream Productions all of today to fix the damage and hopefully let Riley see the dreams they would create the next time she fell asleep.
Still, good thing Disgust hadn't woken up from that noise. She was such a light sleeper that she would frequently get up in the middle of the night and come to stand at the balustrade to comment on whatever dream was currently playing. And Sadness knew she didn't like that because, in her own words, it shaved a considerable amount of time off her "beauty sleep." Not that that kept her from stating her opinion.
Accidentally waking her was especially easy in these summer months, because she had trouble sleeping when she was feeling sweaty. She would take great pains to regularly change her nightgown and bed sheets, and Sadness was sure it was because she always relished the sensation of fresh linen against her skin. She'd seen Disgust give a blissful sigh at curling up in a new blanket, and she remembered a few occasions when her friend had caught symptoms of a sickness of Riley's. Those were the times in which she really needed support, and Sadness never hesitated to grant it.
She focused back on the here and now when she noticed a tiny line of light on the screen. And this, she knew, wasn't a dream; this was Riley waking up. And all by herself, too. Mom had promised to wake her in the morning, but when Riley blinked a second time, Sadness took the light level in her room to mean that it was still too early for that.
But Headquarters was brightening now, so she got up from her chair. She knew she had about a minute to wake the others before Riley became aware of the current imbalance in her Emotions, but the fact that they had missed those wonderful dreams seemed enough justification for Sadness to make her wistful about not knowing more about them. So she quickly pressed a button and then hurried up the ramp to get the others, and the first room she entered was, of course, Joy's.
Joy liked being woken first. It would always lift her spirits to start the day on a high note, and Sadness knew Riley was always happier for it. So whenever Sadness was on Dream Duty, she tried to remember to do them both that favor.
Sadness had to smile at Joy as she pushed the door open. Like almost every night, Joy had kicked her legs so much that the blanket had slipped off the bed completely to lie on the floor. She was shouting something about hockey pucks made of marshmallows, and about rainbow-colored teddy bears. Apparently, she had been allowed to enjoy that exact type of dream tonight that Riley had been denied.
Sadness halted in the door frame to fight off the sudden wave of sorrow that overcame her at the sight. She wished she could sleep like that. Relaxed, carefree, contented. Of course she wasn't sure what her own sleeping habits were - it wasn't as if she could watch herself do it. But still, there was no mistaking the fact that her bed sheets were almost never tousled when she woke up, and on some mornings, her pillow was wet with fresh tears. She probably tended to lie on her bed like a stone all night, contemplating the burden of life even in her dreams.
Not that that was a bad thing, of course. But sometimes, just sometimes, she wished she could dream like they did. She knew from watching Riley's dreams that they tended to reference recent events in her life, things she had thought about, situations she had found herself in. And she knew her own dreams were like that, too, so it was probably the same for the rest of her Emotions, as well.
And that told Sadness that it was no coincidence that the others' sleeping habits matched their daytime personalities. They all knew who they were, what they were, and their instincts helped them get through each day and night.
Why couldn't that be true for her, too? She didn't know who she was. Sure, she had instincts, but they didn't make any sense to her. No one in Headquarters understood why she was even there. What if she really didn't have a purpose? She was just this weirdo messing things up for the others, and her days and nights were depressive because of it. Her life wasn't going anywhere.
And the worst part of it was that no one seemed to want it to go anywhere. Sure, they were all nice enough. They kept talking to her, being friendly to her, trying to cheer her up… but no one had ever expressed any desire for her to have a bigger role in Riley's life, and whenever she so much as touched the console, someone, usually Joy, would be right there to drag her away from it.
The only upside to it was that Riley had never refused her guidance. No, the girl didn't like being sad, but when she was, she was, and then she cried, and kicked and shrieked and made sure the people around her knew she was miserable. And whenever that happened, Sadness knew that she had done something right. She couldn't make sense of it, but she felt it.
With a sigh, she shook her head and reached out to shake Joy's shoulder. Those were thoughts for another night. She'd have to put this topic on hold so that she could be there for Riley today.
She didn't know how. But she knew, on some level, that Riley appreciated her presence. And for the moment, that would have to do.
Note: Can we please all agree that Sadness is the sweetest thing to ever happen?
Yes, I researched the subject matter here. Apparently, it's scientifically proven that everyone dreams every night (excluding really young children and some people with sleep disorders). So the "camera problems" don't mean that Riley doesn't dream, it means she won't remember it in the morning. Note that Dream Productions did create dreams; they just didn't reach her.
Also, I've taken a slight liberty with the layout of Headquarters when Anger wanders off, but there has to be more than one room they can access; they're gonna get freaking cabin fever!
And thanks for all the interest you guys have shown in my upcoming stories! Please don't expect too many updates this month, though - Camp NaNoWriMo will be keeping me busy - but when I do update, the next story should be the humorous one. And if you want more info on the "massive multi-chapter thingy," head on over to my profile to find a link to its Camp page at the top.