The door was solid oak. It was painted and gold leafed with a beautiful Moroccan pattern. There were rose inlays all around it. Yet to him, at this moment, it was the ugliest barrier.

One, two, three…

Joseph took a deep breath, taking his hand off the door in frustration. There was no way he could do this.

One, two, three…

He sighed and inhaled sharply, placing his hands on his hips. He looked like he had just run 10 miles. His nerves were all on edge.

It's just a door.

But it wasn't just a door. It was the door to the Queen's bedchambers. The door to her. And after last night, all he could think about was touching her again. His fingers burned into his clenched fists.

Just knock, man!

He raised his hand again, and put his palm against the wood. He was unsure if he'd ever get the courage to knock. But he had to know what she thought. He had to know what last night meant. He had to know if she was okay.

Joseph had convinced Charlotte that he needed to go over some security briefs with the queen before they left America. As they only had a few hours, it would only make sense for Joseph to wake her instead of Charlotte. Being easily persuaded, Charlotte had agreed. Joseph was set to wake her at 8:30am. The queen was usually awake and ready at 6am, but Joseph was sure she'd sleep in today.

Joseph heard voices in the distance. It was now or never. It's possible that he would not get to speak to her for weeks if he didn't knock now. He had to speak to her. The taste of her was still on his lips.

Before he could complete his knocking, she opened the door.

"Charlotte, I need a few min…Joseph?" She closed the door and leaned against it. Her eyes widened. What was he doing here? Clarisse wasn't ready to face him after last night. She could still feel his hand on the small of her back, leading her to her room. This room.

"Your majesty, please…" Joseph whispered, pleading with her through the oak of the door. After a minute, it opened again.

"Joseph, I'm sorry…of course, come in" She softly pulled the door broad enough for him to pass. He opened his mouth to speak, but she cut him off. "Before we talk, might I ask why you are here so early?"

"Yes, your majesty…"

"Clarisse," she corrected. Anyone who had kissed her should be allowed to call her by her name.

"Yes, Clarisse. I told Charlotte I needed to speak with you about security measures for our trip home" He watched her as she sat on the couch. Her nightgown was covered with a silk coat that hung down to her ankles. Her hair was slightly off center. She was wearing no make-up. She was beautiful. Joseph bit his lip as she crossed her legs.

"And…do you?" she asked, hoping that wasn't the reason he had come back to her.

"No, ma'am. I lied." He grinned at her, remembering that the last time he had done that, his hands had roamed her body.

Clarisse chuckled softly and patted the seat next to her on the couch. Joseph dove for the spot as if she would retract her offer if he didn't move quickly enough.

"So this is about yesterday?" Her heart was in her throat.

She pulled her lips away from his cheek like pulling off a band-aid, slowly and then suddenly. His hands came up to her shoulders and stroked around her back, searching and discovering. Then their lips met fully. Their first kiss was tender and hasty.

"Yes, Clarisse." He closed his eyes, waiting for her response.

Her heavy breath made her chest rise and fall. He kissed her again, pulling her bottom lip into his mouth. She sighed softly. It had been so long since anyone kissed her.

"I'm not sure what you want to talk about" She blinked heavily and then kept her eyes closed, remembering all that had happened after the Independence Day Ball.

They kissed each other all the way through the door and out onto the balcony. Slow, long kisses that drove her crazy. The fresh air only served to make him hungrier. He was finally touching her, and he wasn't sure if he ever wanted to stop.

Clarisse kept her eyes tightly closed. She couldn't look at him. Joseph moved closer to her on the couch and began to whisper in her ear.

She pulled his shirt loose from his belted suit pants as she felt him untying the bow at the side of the dress. Joseph leaned down and kissed the trail of skin exposed by the dress coming undone. Clarisse moaned softly as she worked on the buttons down his front.

"Us, Clarisse. I want to know if there is an us" He said as he saw a tear forming at the corner of her eye. He reached for her hand, but she moved it away.

"Joseph…" she breathed. Could anything come from what had happened? Did she want something to come from it?

He grasped the tops of her arms and pushed her gently up against the wall of the consulate. He told her how gorgeous she was as he pulled her dress down to her hips. Her eyes were squeezed shut. She was all at once captivated and terrified.

"Clarisse. This is all up to you" He stood up, as if to leave.

"Please stay with me" She nearly begged, reaching her hand up to him.

Her hand stroked his neck and back, feeling the ripple of muscle and the rise and fall as he kissed her collarbone, her neck, her breasts. She leaned into his kisses as she stroked him.

She wouldn't let go of him now. She was holding fast to the hand that had touched her so intimately just 12 hours before.

Her legs were shaking as she pulled him closer and kissed him full on the mouth. The gentle breeze caressed their bare skin. She had never felt this way before this moment.

He remembered how they had kissed so passionately the night before, how she tasted like champagne and how her warm breath moved over his bare chest.

Her hands raked across his front and down to his belt. She trembled as she started to undo the buckle. His eyes met hers, seeking and questioning. She nodded. He smiled at her and kissed her forehead.

Clarisse ran her other hand over her leg, staring out the window, looking for answers. Joseph joined her once again on the couch and squeezed her hand.

"Clarisse" he said softly, trying to pull her out of her thoughts, "what are you thinking?"

She ached to be with him as intimately as possible. All of the feelings that she had for him were flooding out of her at once. She stepped out of her gown to reveal what she was wearing underneath. Joseph sank to his knees and kissed her stomach softly. He wanted to ravish her and show her how much he loved her.

Clarisse let the tear fall from her eye. "It's too complicated, Joseph."

"I'm willing to wait for an answer, Clarisse" He said bringing her hand to his mouth and planting a kiss on her palm.

"Don't…" she sighed half-heartedly. She knew she should stop him, but she hadn't when it had really mattered.

His hands stroked her thighs, and she gasped as his fingertips ran over her. He could feel the silk of her lingerie, warm under his hands. Neither cared about their less than private location. Clarisse just wanted him to take her away from all of her duties and problems. Joseph had loved her for so long that he couldn't spend long enough worshipping her.

"Okay," he said, "do you want me to go?"

"No!" she nearly shouted at him. "I don't know what I want." That had been abundantly clear to Joseph from the first day they met. The queen was never sure about her own feelings.

She hadn't protested a single thing that evening. She pressed against him and they moved together as they made love. They were quiet, but fervent. Everything was happening all at once.

"I do," he said.

"You do what?"

She couldn't keep hold of her wits as he loved her. Joseph lived for the tiny sounds escaping her lips. He knew she was embarrassed, and he wanted to tell her that she was allowed to enjoy this, she deserved pleasure.

"I know what I want," he said, stroking the back of her hand.

Joseph collapsed against her as she began to cry. He pulled her in and they sank to the ground, the concrete cold beneath them. He whispered sweetly to her as her sniffles turned to sobs. Joseph felt tears in his own eyes. They had been lonely so long. He stroked her hair until they both fell asleep.

"I know you do. I know," Clarisse fell into his arms and he held her close, "I know."

Joseph placed a hand beneath her chin and met her eyes.

"You know it's always been you, Clarisse," he whispered as he kissed her sweetly on the lips.

"What?" She looked at him, doe-eyed.

"I'll wait forever. I've loved you for 30 years"

"Joseph…" she breathed, "you love me?"

"Forgive me, your majesty, but you're blind if you never saw how much I adore and love you."

"Oh Joseph…I…"

"Clarisse Renaldi. I. Love. You. Forever," he punctuated his words with kisses.

"I can't…" she started to cry, "no…I mean…I love you, too." The words stung her throat as they came out though she'd never meant them more than right now. "It's just…"

"Clarisse…" he cautioned. He wanted to savor this moment without the speech about duty and responsibility. He never wanted 'Her Majesty,' he wanted Clarisse. "Clarisse, I know you have your duties as queen, and that those are the most important things to you, and I do not intend to stand in your way." She stopped him with a kiss. He ran his hands through her hair.

"It's not that. It's not the monarchy" she looked away. "No one has ever loved me before. I'm terrified. Oh, this emotional mess isn't me, Joseph, I'm sorry."

"Clarisse, plenty of people have loved you, my dear," he turned her face to him again, "I have always loved you."

"All right. But no one has ever been IN love with me. Not like you…They way that you treated me last night…I'm still trembling," she blushed.

"Ah, is this what you want to talk about?" Joseph leaned forward and captured her lips in a kiss, traveling down to her neck. She chuckled and pushed him away.

"Mmmm…yes, but no, Joseph" she stood up and walked across the room, "perhaps we could, start over…take this more slowly." He nodded.

"Clarrise? Do you regret it?" He asked, trying desperately to push the hurt out of his voice.

"Regret is a strong word, Joseph." She said, moving her hands to smooth her nightgown.

"I see…" Joseph stood up. "I'll be going now, Clarisse. You need to get ready to leave."

"Joseph?" She called after him frantically. "I don't regret it. You have to know that. I love you."