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All month Reno and Elena had been waging their superficial war on each other and any other haphazard employee that managed to end up between them. It had been getting worse over the last few days. The previous day Elena had put Tabasco sauce in Reno's coffee. Today was the last straw. This morning Reno had, in return, a dump truck pile a metric ton of Chocobo manure on Elena's convertible. Rufus had enough. He had to figure something out to separate Reno and Elena... They were giving the company a bad image and he would not stand for it. So tonight, he would call a special meeting, just focusing on two youngest Turks. A meeting to decide which one would be leaving.
The meeting was held after hours, with just the executives participating. Rufus started the meeting and presented the problem. "I'm open to ideas," he stated afterward and sat down. Scarlet stood up and smiled. "I know just the thing," she started, and gave everyone her infamous "Kya-ha-ha!" Rufus cringed. "And... what per say did you have in mind," the young president asked. Scarlet walked over and whispered something in his ear, and he stood up. "That is an excellent idea Scarlet.
And if nobody else has any ideas..." Rufus trailed off waiting for any reply. "Good, then that is what I will do. Thank you and here's a gil for your time," he dropped the change in front of her feet and left to his office, to his phone.
About the same time Rufus was picking up his telephone, on the other side of town Reno was arriving home from work, struggling between a case of Turks Light beer, a bag of groceries, and his keys. Any normal person would have just set the stuff down, but not Reno. To top is off he was gripping a Midgar Burger fast food bag in his teeth and standing with one knee up under the grocery bag trying to keep it all from falling. After a few minutes of shifting and struggling, he did get the door open and as soon as he kicked it closed, the bag ripped. "Just my luck," he thought to himself and sighed. At least it was Friday. He ripped a beer from it's box and continued to the couch, pausing to take the food bag from his teeth and extract one of his fries.
Back in Rufus's office, he was setting the phone back into place. "This will be too easy," he thought. "As long as he's at home and not in some scummy bar in who-knows-where..."
"Midgar Burger I love to eat, Midgar Burger it's such a treat, Midgar Burger makes me wanna dance, Midgar Burger ain't in my pants," Reno sang loudly as he ate his dinner, dancing around the small living room and spewing beer and burger bits all over the carpet as he went. He paused for a moment, thinking of the next line and taking the last beer from it's box. He opened the beer and took a drink, suddenly coming up with the next line. "Midgar Burger gives me such luck, Midgar Burger makes me wanna F..." A sharp knocking at the door cut Reno off from his enthusiastic singing and he spun around to look out the peek hole. It was Elena.
"What does she want," he thought to himself. "Whaddaya want," he screamed through the door, hoping she'd leave. "I brought you a bottle of rum," she screamed back. "Rufus said it's your birthday!" He swung the door open and ushered her inside. "You remembered," he screamed at her face, hugging her tight. She wasn't quite sure why he was screaming, so she screamed back "Happy birthday!" "Yay," he screamed back, never the less enthusiastic. He let go and disappeared for a moment, then came back with two shot glasses and the biggest grin ever. Elena backed up towards the door. "We're gonna play strip shots then," he screamed. "And I win!" Tuning a brighter shade of red than Reno's hair, Elena quickly ran out of the building, never looking back. Reno stood at the door and screamed "Happy birthday anyway," and closed the door.
One of his neighbors shouted something at him, but he didn't care. He threw one of the shot glasses back towards the kitchen, never minding the breaking of the glass, and sat down with his newest alcohol. He smiled as he opened the bottle and laughed as he watched some spill over onto the rug. "Elena bought me booze," he giggled loudly to himself. "I like that girl... she's all right..." he fell over and just stayed there, laughing, remembering his song of earlier. "I gotta ask Elena to Midgar Burger with me tomorrow..."
A/N-
Turk Light is one of Reno's attacks on FF7, and it sounded like an awesome name for a Shinra - Company owned beer.
Midgar Burger was inspired By Mc Donalds, which I was eating as I wrote this. That is not their official slogan, that was purely Reno in all his drunken glory. Go Reno!