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Ellie had been typing on her laptop for the last ten minutes, but she had no idea what she had written.
Set during ep 13x09 – Day in Court. I'm not sure if it fits in the narrative of the episode, but I couldn't stop thinking about this scene after it popped in my head. I know it's ansgty and short - I really wanted someone to give Ellie a hug. Hope you enjoy it.
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Ellie had been typing on her laptop for the last ten minutes, but she had no idea what she had written. She realized the screen was just a dimly lit, blurred spot, but even changing the light settings didn't make any difference. The problem was that she couldn't concentrate: as soon as a repetitive task was at hand, her mind was free to wander back to Jake and those awful moments in their living room. On top of that, she was trying really hard not to cry, dammit - the glances thrown in her direction by the whole team were enough as they were, she didn't really need to have a breakdown in front of them. She didn't want to be pitied.
She couldn't just sit at her desk pretending to work while torturing herself, though. She stood up abruptly, causing the other three people around her to turn their heads towards her, brows furrowed at various degrees. Ellie ignored their worried looks, and walked out of her cubicle - she didn't set a direction, to be honest, but her feet seemed to know where to go.
Ellie found herself in front of the morgue's glass doors - she had no recollection of ever deciding to go down there, but maybe that was the place where her subconscious thought she needed to be. Almost every light was turned off; the doors opened with the usual sound, and Ellie stepped inside. Doctor Mallard was nowhere to be seen (not that Ellie made a real effort to find him), but a halo of light caught her eye at the opposite side of the lab, near the floor. She approached it and saw Jimmy sleeping on the floor, his back to the wall and a desk lamp near his feet.
Ellie sat near Jimmy's head, careful not to wake him up. She hugged her knees and let her eyes get used to the scarce light in the room. Her mind kept wandering wildly, though. She went back to the horrible hours when her gut was being chewed by worry. She pictured again the view from the restaurant's window that very day. She thought about her frustration at not knowing where her husb- Jake was. She played their last conversation in her head again and again and again. She lost track of time: she couldn't tell if she'd spent hours on the cold floor, or mere minutes. The pain was making her shiver; she started breathing sharply and noisily.
Jimmy stirred and opened his eyes; as he noticed Ellie sitting beside him, he quickly got up to mimic her position. He was unsure about what to do and oblivious to the reason of her presence there, and he felt like he needed at least to justify the state in which Ellie had found him.
"Umm... I'm sorry I was sleeping... I hope you didn't need anything urgently- fact is, these last two nights I've been up because Victoria won't sleep and Breena is exhausted and I've told her to rest so I'm totally responsible for the 'screaming-infant-thing' an-"
Ellie had tried to keep the tears at bay, forcing herself not to cry, not there in the office, but she felt them falling down her cheeks nonetheless. She hated herself for not being able to stay collected, but hell, she just couldn't. Poor Jimmy was tired and surely not prepared for this - sitting beside her and stroking her hair, his touch uneasy but comforting. Ellie was grateful he didn't run away.