Warning: Although this abridgement, if tahts even a real word, beings with abridging Into the Wild it contains spoilers for teh other books in the series as well.
Disclaimer: I don't own Warriors or any of its characters.
Bluestar-blue gray she cat and ThunderClan leader
Spottedleaf-tortoiseshell medicine cat of ThunderClan
Redtail-has a red tail and the deputy of ThunderClan
Tigerclaw-massive brown tabby
Oakheart-bracken colored and the deputy of RiverClan
Warriors abridged
Tigerclaw was angry as usual. He decided to take out his anger in the healthiest way he knew. Kill RiverClan cats. He had smelled them and in ThunderClan territory and decided to attack. He charged at the first cat he saw and pinned them to the ground instantly. He realized that the cat was Oakheart, the RiverClan deputy.
"Oakheart, what the StarClan are you doing here? This is our territory." Tigerclaw growled. Oakheart grinned at Tigerclaw.
"Yeah, that's what you think Tigerclaw. RiverClan attack!" He yelled. At Oakheart's signal cats began to emerge from the water.
"You can't do that Oakheart. Only pirates from Pirates of the Caribbean can emerge from water like that." Tigerclaw objected.
"Well what are you going to do Tigerclaw, sick copyright laws on me?" Oakheart demanded. That made Tigerclaw angry. He raised his claw and was about to kill Oakheart, but a voice stopped him.
"No Tigerclaw! You can't kill Oakheart." A voice objected. Tigerclaw turned around to see Redtail, the ThunderClan deputy.
"You know the Warrior Code Tigerclaw. You can't kill another cat unless they've had up to 5 minutes of screen time." Redtail stated. Tigerclaw snarled at Redtail. He really didn't care for the code, but if someone shoved it in his face he obeyed it.
"Fine, I'll let him go." Tigerclaw said and he left Oakheart.
"Haha coward RiverClan wins!" Oakheart yelled triumphantly. Tigerclaw was really mad now. He was going to pounce on Oakheart, but he saw Redtail glaring at him and he decided it wasn't the best idea.
"Enjoy your precious screen time Oakheart, because one day Redtail won't be able to protect you, and it'll because I killed him. And then all your screen time will be mine!" Tigerclaw cackled.
"Um Tigerclaw, I can hear you." Redtail said.
"Oh crap, I mean uh Ravenpaw said it." Tigerclaw lied. Redtail flicked his tail in annoyance.
"That bastard. I knew he couldn't be trusted, unlike you Tigerclaw. I'd trust you with my life." Redtail stated. Tigerclaw grinned.
"I know."
***
Bluestar approached Spottedleaf.
"Spottedleaf do you know what happened." Spottedleaf nodded.
"Your boyfriend Oakheart beat them." She answered. Bluestar grimaced.
"He's so lucky we're separated, because if we weren't I'd give him a nagging that he'd remember for years." Bluestar then sighed. "I should have filed for joint custody." Spottedleaf nodded. Just then a comet zoomed over head.
"Make a wish Spottedleaf." Bluestar said wistfully. Spottedleaf closed her eyes.
"Fire alone will save our clan." She said. Bluestar stared at her.
"What kind of wish is that?" She asked. Spottedleaf sighed and looked at her clan leader.
"It wasn't a wish Bluestar; it was a sign from StarClan." The medicine cat replied. Bluestar nodded.
"Okay then, but you just wasted a wish." She stated.
"Well then o great leader what did you wish for?" Spottedleaf demanded. Bluestar stared at Silverpelt.
"I wished for socks."
