Up and Down
Summary: Jessalynn is the youngest daughter of WWE legend Stone Cold Steve Austin. She grew up in the business, but unlike her four older sisters, she has decided not to work for the WWE. Katelynn is an up and coming future Diva's champion. Miranda is the first woman ever on the commentary team. Amanda is a veteran Diva. Abby is Stephanie McMahon's right hand.
Jessalynn is a mess of emotion, a whirlwind that creates drama wherever she goes. It's not her fault, however. She's been battling Bipolar Disorder since her teenage years. Her moods change quickly and without notice. The mood disorder takes a toll on her professional and personal life. She runs through boyfriends like there is no tomorrow. She works intermittently. She's turned down numerous offers from her father to help her get a steady job at the company. He knows that her background in sales and marketing could help ground her at the WWE. He's confident that if she would just come home and work out of the Houston satellite office in the sales department, she would settle down. He could also keep a closer eye on her.
While the rest of the family has their homebase in various cities in their home state of Texas, Jessalynn left for the frozen tundra of Chicago after graduating from A & M. She lives alone in a studio apartment and works part time for a nonprofit soliciting donations. Because of her disorder, she finds it hard to work a full forty hours a week. Her on and off boyfriend, Scott, lives in the same building and is a semi-professional wrestler under the ring name Colt Cabana. Scott tries his hardest to live with her and love her despite her moods. It's the hardest thing he's ever had to deal with.
Follow Jessalynn and her ups and downs as she tries to navigate through life.
Characters: Jessalynn Austin (oc), Stone Cold Steve Austin, Colt Cabana, CM Punk and others.
Story begins in early 2011.
Chapter 1: Down
"Babe, you have to get out of bed," Scott said softly as he stroked my hair. "You can't stay here all day, you have to go to work….."
I shook my head "no" and wiped the never ending tears from my face. "I can't go back there. Please don't…..make me go, Scotty….." I sobbed as I leaned into his broad chest where the tears kept flowing.
"Jessa, you're overreacting. You're fine. You have to go to work. They're gonna fire you if you don't go."
"Let them fire me then. I don't care….I don't care about anything," I wailed as I moved away from my boyfriend and threw myself down on the bed again. I pulled the quilt over my head and broke down again.
Scott sighed. He rubbed my back through the blanket. "Babe…...have you been taking your meds?" he asked softly.
I whipped the blanket off of me and sat up. Glaring at him, "Why is it," I snarled, "that any time I'm feeling down, or sad, or pissed off, you automatically assume that I'm not taking my medication?" I was pissed. My mood had changed from 'woe is me', the world is horrible, to bitch in a matter of seconds.
Scott had been with me long enough to know better than to assume I was off my meds anytime that I wasn't feeling like myself. Though most of the time, I was feeling down because I had stopped taking them. It was a never ending cycle with me. I needed those medications to help keep myself stable, but I always stopped taking them when I started to feel better. Then things like this would happen-and I would cry and stay in bed for days at a time. And whenever he tries to help me, I would lash out at him. Dating me is like the weather-always changing and highly unpredictable. All he could do was apologize and hope I didn't freak out and break up with him. Again. "I'm sorry, hon…...I'm just…..I'm sorry, okay?" he said softly as he reached for me. I slapped his hand away.
"Just don't. Just….leave me alone," I snarled at him.
I sat crossed legged on the bed, pulled the quilt over my shoulders and glared at the wall. If I sat here long enough, not speaking to him, he would leave. And that's all I wanted him to do right now. Leave. I don't know why he puts up with me. He's the sweetest guy I've ever dated. And I've been through plenty of men.
He broke his usual record of waiting for me to talk to him. He will usually only wait five minutes of the cold shoulder. He must have been really worried about me. Today he waited thirteen minutes.
Finally he let out a big sigh and attempted to kiss me on the cheek. I moved my head so his lips wouldn't touch me. "You better call into work then. You know you'll feel horrible if they fire you….I'll call you later?"
Silence.
"I love you?" he whispered as he patted my knee and got off the bed. "Babe?"
I just sat there in silence. Not only was I moody and sad today, I was being stubborn. I knew he loved me. And I loved him too. Somedays. Other days I wanted to break up with him. He was too patient, too loving, too perfect. I didn't deserve him. But he was always there for me, even when I was acting like this.
He wasn't leaving until I told him I loved him. I just wanted him to go. To leave me here to wallow in my own self pity. He knelt in front of me, and reached up to take my chin in his big hands. "Please look at me….." he murmured.
I felt the tears start to well up in my eyes again. I just wanted him to go away so I could cry and feel sorry for myself in peace. "Please?" he whispered. I shook my head no. Why wouldn't he understand that I just wanted him to go away?
"Scott. Please just leave….I…..I want to be alone. I want you to leave."
"I don't want to leave you like this."
"I'll be fine."
He chuckled. "You are far from fine. You-"
"Get out! I want you to leave!" I finally screamed at him. "Why don't you understand that I just want to lay here and feel sorry for myself? Are you stupid? Do you not see that I don't want you here?" I was breathing hard. My heart was pounding. I could feel my anxiety rising. Harsh words were just tumbling out of my mouth, and I couldn't stop them.
He just stared at me with those big brown eyes. He let out a big sigh. "You know something? One of these days you're going to tell me to leave and I won't come back. I'm getting tired of this." He stood up and started walking towards the door. "I love you, Jessalynn. I really do love you, but you need help."
"Get out!" I screeched at him, pointing towards the door, tears were freely streaming down my cheeks.
He shook his head. "You're acting like a crazy woman. Take your damn meds,"
I picked up the vase of flowers that were on my nightstand and got ready to throw it at him. He closed the door behind him and the vase crashed against the wall without inflicting any pain.
I let out a wail and threw myself down on my bed. I sobbed for the broken vase of beautiful flowers that he had just bought me. I sobbed because I couldn't control my emotions. I cried because I hated my life. I cried because I was such a bitch and didn't deserve a good man like him. He was right; if I kept pushing him away, there was always the chance that he wouldn't come back to me.
