To Have, To Love

Disclaimer: I do not own Twilight, obviously. Otherwise quite a few things would be different.

Warnings: This story contains Femslash otherwise known as Lesbianism so if you don't like it then don't read it. Please click the red 'X' at the top right hand corner of the page or hit the back arrow. I have zero tolerance for flamers. Also, this story does not exactly follow the movie or the book but the key points are there. It also contains; swearing, violence, character death, suicide, drug usage, sexual content, angst, dark humor, and anything else I have forgot.


Prologue: To Have, To Love - Those Green Eyes

"Just go jump off a cliff, Leah. Everyone is tired of you moping around and your attitude. Sam doesn't want you. He has Emily. Get over it." Paul growled out of frustration and annoyance.

She vaguely heard Sam snap at Paul. That's when she realized, she had nothing. Sam didn't want or need her. The pack was tired of her and most of them had someone waiting for them. Her mom and brother avoided her because of Sam and Emily's upcoming wedding which was making her even more irritated and harder to deal with than usual. What did she have?

The pack winced when Leah's past memories of her relationship with Sam up until Emily fully accepting the imprint along with her conflicting emotions hit them full force which ranged from anger, to sadness, then nothing - that's when they knew something was wrong. Leah always portrayed some kind of emotion even if it was anger or annoyance, her feelings were apparent unlike now - she was emotionless, cold.

Her once passionate chocolate brown eyes were now void of emotion as a cold smile came over her beautiful scowled face, "You know, I think I just might do that."

"What?" Paul was taken aback, stunned even. He didn't think she would take it to heart let alone go through with it.

"Leah!" Seth and Jacob shouted, stepping closer to her but she had already took off before they were even close. That's when everyone knew - she was serious, dead serious.

"I command you to stop, Leah!" For the first time in her life, Leah ignored her former lover's Alpha command which only encouraged her legs to move faster, to push harder. The wind felt magnificent against her burning skin, her breath came out in short pants before turning into small puffs of white as her eyes remained focused on her goal - the cliff. The end of all her suffering and ultimately everyone else's.

"Please! Stop! What about me!? What about mom!?" Seth's pleas were heartwenching and she almost stopped for her little brother, almost. Why couldn't he see she was doing him a favor? No worries, it will be over in a few more moments then he would see.

She should have done this months ago, Paul actually had the right idea. A wolfish smile came over her face as she busted out from the tree line, she shifted out of her wolf form ignoring her nudeness as she began to grow annoyed with her former pack's shouting just as they came out from the woods. Seth and Paul were already in human form as her feet reached the rocky, moss-covered edge.

She never once thought of backing down, she wanted this, craved it even.

"Leah!" Then she jumped, the bitter wind rapidly blowing through her hair as she grew closer to the water and rocks below. She welcomed the feel of the icy cold water encasing her heated flesh and allowed herself to be pulled and tugged closer to the beach's floor by the current. Leah couldn't help but look up at the shimmering water where the sunlight hit.

Who is that?

Something, someone broke through the water and was making their way towards her, reaching for her.

Leah couldn't help but thinking that the person had the most beautiful green eyes she had ever seen and she felt warm for the first time in a long time before she allowed her eyes to close and drifted off into nothingness.


Noah's POV

"As cold as it is, you wanted to go to the beach?" I rolled my eyes as I swiftly checked my FujiFilm FinePix before pausing to capture the beauty of the pinkish-orange light of the sun over the glittery light blue top of First Beach. Despite La Push being a small Indian Reservation, it had some of the most beautiful scenery I have ever seen, almost as if it was left untouched by time, there was something mystical, mesmerizing about this place.

"Nobody asked you to come." I muttered under my breath, annoyed with her bickering as I enjoyed the breeze running its airy fingers through my thick, neck-length, messy hair that was growing rapidly though I had only cut it off two weeks ago. She continued to rant for a few more minutes before I completely toned her out. The sand was a light brown, almost white, slightly warn as I picked up a handful and allowed it to slip through my fingers. I glanced towards the woods where I knew La Push was located, noting the different shades of green and browns the wilderness had then my eyes trailed over to the half a dozen tall, mountain-like islands not too far off from the beach. My mind conjured up possibilities of why that was. Where those islands part of La Push at one time? If so, how big was the reservation really? Could those islands be dormant volcanoes of some sort? What kind of animals called those places home? Did anyone ever go there?

"Noah! Are you even listening to me?" When did she get so close to me? I almost jumped three feet in the air before I twirled around to face her fuming form with an eyebrow raised.

"Lay off, Mara! I told you to wear something other than those damn shorts," I replied cutting my eyes to the so-called jean shorts that were only a few inches longer than Daisy Dukes if that, "I can't believe Mom didn't see those." I complained. Disgusting. Though it was a little over fifty-five degrees, twice as high as it's been since we got here. It was still pretty cold due to the wind chill and possible tornado coming from off the coast.

"What's wrong with my clothes!?" She actually had the nerve to sound offended. I ignored her as I continued along the rim of the shallow, translucent blue water. We were moving closer to a large cliff up ahead when I hear shouting coming from there, barely making out a half of dozen figures though one was dangerously close to the edge.

"What are they yelling about?" I frowned, pulling out my binoculars and peering into them to see a girl dive into the freezing waters. She's committing suicide! I gasped before throwing the binoculars down and thrusting my camera into the confused hands of my little sister. I threw my oversized jacket on the ground while taking off my shoes.

"Noah? What- Hey! Are you crazy!" She shouted as I drove into the icy ocean and frantically swum in the direction I last saw her body. I barely heard Mara's pleas for me to come back or for the people at the cliff's edge to help or get someone. I ignored the water burning my eyes and peered into the darkening water, I panicked when I couldn't see her anymore but I caught a glance of her ebony hair floating around her like a halo. The current was pulling her down rapidly and I was worried, terrified I wouldn't reach her in time. Come on, come on. Just a little closer.

Reach for her, Noah! You have to get her!

I was stunned when I caught sight of her beautiful chocolate brown eyes but snapped back to reality as they closed almost peacefully. I grabbed her wrist and pulled her closer to me, flinching at how hot her body was, before propelling myself upward until our heads broke the water. I caught sight of a group of Native American boys still standing on the edge, looking shell-shocked.

"Hey!" Now I had their full attention, "What are you doing!? Help me!" Not even moments later two of them dived into the water and was swimming around towards us as I tried unsuccessfully to swim closer to the sandy beach. I felt shivers down my spine, knowing a storm was coming closer to the area which means powerful waves were coming. We had to get her out of the water - now!

"You have to get her to shore," I said, looking at both of them with my teeth chattering but they didn't look effected by the cold water temperature just like the girl, must be a Quileute thing, "Mara, get the blankets ready!" I shouted towards the shore while peeling off the long extra shirt I was wearing, attempting to cover her nude body but the boys seemed to concern to notice thankfully.

Between the three of us, well namely them, we managed to get the girl on the sandy shore while I draped the warm blanket over her before I started pumping her chest to encourage the water to escape her lungs before breathing into her mouth, in two sets. Then three, four, five. Minutes passed and I began to grow frantic but she started coughing and I knew she was alright as I propped her head up with towel Mara handed me. Three of the boys were always near her but I noticed their faces held a mixture of guiltiness, disbelief, and reassurance as they gazed down at her, perhaps shocked of the circumstances but I'm sure there was something more to it. Another held her close to him, tightly as if he was afraid that she would disappear while keeping her warm against the icy breeze that passed through. I felt a stab at my heart but brushed it aside, I didn't know this girl.

"Noah? Are you okay? You're freezing." Mara questioned, kneeling down besides me while wrapping a blanket around my shivering shoulders. I noticed several adults running towards us and figured someone told them what happened. One woman in particular had tears streaming down her face as she held the youngest boy closer to her before looked down at the girl, a family. Mara brushed a long piece of my curling hair away from my face so she could see me better.

"I'm fine," My voice was barely above a whisper, than I smiled, "I could sure use some hot chocolate though." My little sister shook her head in disbelief and annoyance, "Seriously? You dive into the freezing water and all you can think about is hot chocolate?!" How cute, my little sister actual loves me.

"You're too young to have high blood pressure, Mars." I teased, patting her knee only for her to lightly punch my shoulder in exasperation. She glared at me, "Shut up."

"Is that really how you're going to speak to your older sister who risked her life in the freezing cold?" I teased, shaking my head, "Wait till mom hears about your lack of appreciation and concern." She opened her mouth to retort when she was cut off.

"That was noble of you," We both looked up to see one of the boys sitting in front of us with a solemn smile on his face, "Thank you." I shook my head, refusing to accept it.

"I acted. There's nothing to thank me for," he opened his mouth to continue but I titled my head to the side, watching as a pair of older men rushing the girl's unconscious body to a house not to far away with the woman not too far behind, "You should go check on her, we'll be okay." I concluded, standing up with little help from Mara. The boy looked ready to argue but someone else beat him to it.

"We can't let you leave like that," a man around my age probably a few years older than me said, looking down at me with sad eyes, "It's freezing out here. You don't need to catch a cold. At least stay in my house for a while to get warm."

"You'll catch hypothermia." A woman a few years older than me added, I vaguely noticed the scars running down the left side of her face, she was still a beautiful woman. That made sense.

Reluctantly I sighed in resignation, "Alright, but only if you give me hot chocolate." I replied, seriously. I barley heard Mara mutter "idiot" before darkness dotted my vision and I passed out with a smile on my face.


Author's Note: I created this story because I have read all the Leah/FOC stories I could find on this site and very few on other sites. I was disappointed that many were starting to get interesting but were never completed. So, I decided to give it a shot. This is my first Twilight story and I tried a differentish form of writing than I am use to. But I hope some people like this story. I need a change from zombie-related stories. Please review, favorite, or follow!

"Noah" is portrayed by Rihanna (when she has the Audrey Hepburn style and her newest shoulder-length black hair).

"Mara" is portrayed by Amandla Stenberg.

All the Twilight Saga characters are played by the respective actresses (or simply picture them how you see them).