YYH Goes Totally 80s!

Note: The idea for this fic came from listening to 80s music for 3 hours and watching episodes of Yu Yu Hakusho for another 3 hours. Enjoy!


It was a beautiful day in Japan. There wasn't a cloud in the sky and the sun seemed to smile on every object down below.

Mer was walking down the sidewalk, her hands in her pockets, pondering about the plot of her next fanfic. But alas, the poor girl could think of absolutely nothing to write about. She was becoming rather frustrated.

"Dammit!" she screamed as she kicked a scrunched up can on the sidewalk. "Every plot I think about either sucks or somebody else thought of it already! What am I supposed to do?!"

She continued walking when she arrived at Keiko's Ramen Shop.

"Hmm, I didn't know I was this close to the Ramen Shop," Mer said as she looked it over. "Hey! Maybe I can ask Keiko if she has any ideas for a fanfic!" And she casually entered the Ramen Shop.

As she closed the sliding door behind her, Mer noticed Yusuke sitting at one of the tables. She smiled and went over to him.

"Hey, Yusuke! How's it going?" she asked.

"Good." he said bluntly.

"Glad to hear it! Is Keiko here?"

Yusuke sighed and put his head in his hands. "She was more like a beauty queen from a movie scene." he said in a surprisingly downtrodden manner. Mer raised an eyebrow.

"Umm, does that mean she's not here?" she asked.

"What? No, she's here."

That was when Mer heard footsteps coming down the stairs. She looked over and saw Keiko coming toward her and Yusuke.

"Hi guys!" she said happily.

"Billie Jean, you're here!" Yusuke said as a smile formed on his face.

The happiness suddenly drained out of Keiko's voice.

"Yusuke, did you just call me Billie Jean?" she asked darkly.

"No, I don't believe I did." Yusuke said as he closed his eyes and leaned back on his chair.

"Yes you did, you called me Billie Jean. She's that girl that lives down your block, right?"

"Umm, no?"

"Yes she is! I guess she's your new lover." Keiko said as she crossed her arms and turned away from Yusuke. Yusuke stood up and faced Keiko.

"Billie Jean is NOT my lover!" he said forcefully.

"Hmm, Billie Jean is not your lover, yet she's the girl that claims that you are the one!"

"For the last time, that kid is not my son!" Yusuke yelled. "She SAYS I am the one, but the kid is NOT my son!"

"His eyes are exactly like yours!"

Yusuke put his head in his hand.

"Oh no," he murmured. "That's cause we danced on the floor in the round... baby."

"So it's true!!!"

"I didn't say that!"

"But that's what you implied!"

"I did not!!"

"Umm, what the hell are you two talking about?" Mer asked, a very confused look on her face. Keiko sighed and turned to Mer.

"It's nothing," she answered. "Nothing you should be concerned about. By the way, did you come here for a reason?"

"Umm, well, darn, in the midst of the fighting I forgot."

"Take your time," Keiko then turned to Yusuke. "She says you're the one!" she sang.

"THE KID IS NOT MY SON!!!!" Yusuke screamed.

Suddenly, Mer remembered what she wanted to ask Keiko, but at that time she didn't think it was good to ask questions.

"Y'know," Mer said as she stood up and pointed towards the door. "I...I think I'm gonna leave now, leave you two alone."

"Wait, what about-"

"Nevermind, it's nothing." and Mer was out the door.

***
Mer continued walking down the sidewalk.

"Geeze, I wonder what that was all about," she asked herself. "Well, no matter. I'll just ask Kurama if he has any ideas."

She got to Kurama's house and knocked on the door. His mother answered it.

"Hello, Mrs. Minamino," Mer said politely. "Is Suuichi here?"

"Oh yes, he's in the backyard. You can see him if you want." Mrs. Minamino said nicely.

"Thank you." Mer said as she followed the walkway leading into the backyard.

When she arrived, she saw Kurama, hitting pop-up cardboard demons with his rosewhip.

"Hey, Kurama." she said as she stared at the pop-up demons splitting in half and repeatedly falling over. Kurama turned around.

"Oh, greetings, Mer," he said. "May I suggest that you step off that crack?"

Mer was taken aback by the statement.

"What?" she asked.

"You're stepping on that crack on the concrete," Kurama indicated where Mer was standing. "If you step on a crack, you break your momma's back."

Mer raised her eyebrow again and jumped off the walkway.

"I didn't know you believed in superstitions." Mer said.

"I only believe in certain ones," Kurama then hit two demons. "Is there something you want to tell me?"

"Well yes. You see, I have a problem-"

"When a problem comes along, you must whip it." As Kurama said "whip it" he hit another two demons. Mer was very confused.

"Whip it?" she asked.

"Whip it good!" Kurama replied, hitting yet another demon.

Mer was now completely baffled. Kurama was not acting like himself at all.

"Kurama, is something wrong?" she asked.

"When something's going wrong, you must whip it." he answered.

"Okay, I'm getting a little freaked out," Mer began to walk out of the backyard. "I'll talk to somebody else about my problem."

Kurama rolled his whip up and stretched it.

"All right, just remember to whip it good!" he said.

"Yeah, sure, fine." Mer said nervously. She ran away from the house as fast as she could.

***
"Man, Yusuke, Keiko, and Kurama are really acting weird today," Mer said as she started to walk toward the park. She saw Botan and Koenma (in his adult form) standing by a tree. "Hmm, maybe they can help me with my fanfic."

As Mer went over to them, she began to hear pieces of their conversation.

"Oh Koenma, I'm so excited," Botan said cheerfully as she began to jump up and down. "And I just can't hide it! I... I'm about to lose control and I think I like it!"

"Oh, darling, I feel exactly the same way," Koenma said as he pulled Botan close to him. "I know, I know, I know, I know, I know I want you. I want you."

"Umm, Koenma? Why did you just say 'I know' five times and 'I want you' twice?" Mer asked as she reached them.

"BECAUSE I LOVE BOTAN!!!!" Koenma screamed as he put his lips on Botan's. Then they fell on the ground and began to make out. Mer stared at them for two seconds then left them alone.

"All right, y'know what, screw the fanfic," Mer said to herself as she walked to a different part of the park. "I have to find out why everybody is talking and acting so strangely first."

That was when she arrived at a quiet, serene place in the park. It had a little pond and was covered in ducks and pigeons. Mer decided to walk around when she found a bench. On that bench was Yukina, feeding all the birds around her.

'Maybe Yukina knows what's wrong with everyone.' Mer thought. She sat down next to Yukina and started a conversation.

"Hi, Yukina." she said.

After Yukina threw a handful of birdseed towards the pigeons, she turned around and smiled at Mer.

"Oh, hello Mer," she replied. "How do you do?"

"Well, right now, I'm a bit confused," Mer answered. "Yusuke, Keiko, Kurama, Botan and Koenma are acting really weird today. Do you know why?"

"Hmm, I haven't really noticed anything. Can you give me an example?"

"Well, to start it off-" suddenly, a bunch of pigeons flew right into Mer's face. After about five minutes, Mer was left on the bench, coughing and sputtering out a bunch of bird feathers.

"Damn, those birds can really fly." Mer said as she tried to brush the feathers off her body. Yukina slowly stood up and walked toward the pond. She stopped at its edge and closed her eyes.

"Birds fly in the eye of the faithless daughter." she said quietly.

"Pardon me?" Mer asked as she looked up from the feathers still on her body.

"Broken, at the bitter end, wasted, sacrifice for a new nirvana, night time, sends us on our way."

"Oh no, not you too!"

At that moment, Yukina spread her arms wide apart.

"We are, we are, we are but your children," she said in a dramatic voice. "Finding our way around indecision. We are, we are, we are ever helpless," She stopped and spoke in a louder voice. She was practically shouting. "TAKE US FOREVER!!"

At that moment, clouds came out of nowhere and covered up the sun. A loud clap of thunder was heard too. Then, a bolt of lightning zapped down right next to Mer.

"AHHHHHHH!!!!!" Mer screamed as she jumped away from it. She ran out of the park without saying anything to Yukina.

***
When Mer was back on the sidewalk, she dropped to her knees and took a few deep breaths.

"Okay, that was the freakiest thing that happened yet," she said. "I thought I was gonna die!" she took a few more deep breaths then stood up. "I think I'm okay now." she started to walk again when she felt something fuzzy rub against her leg. She looked down and saw a partially orange fuzzball.

"AHHHHHHHH!!!!" she screamed as she looked at it. The thing looked up at Mer curiously.

"Meow?" it asked. Mer stared at its face and let out a sigh of relief.

"Oh, it's only you, Eikichi," she said as she picked her up. "Sorry if I startled you. I've had a pretty long day."

"Meow!" Eikichi said as she nestled her head against Mer's cheek. Mer smiled and hugged her.

"I'm glad you understand," she told the cat. "By the way, what are you doing so far from home? Kuwabara must be worried about you."

"Meow!"

"I guess I should bring you home."

"Meow!" and they went on their way to the Kuwabara household.

***
When Mer was about five blocks down from where she started, she heard a familiar voice.

"Eikichi! Eikichi, where are you?"

"Hey, that sounds like Kuwabara!" Mer said as she looked at Eikichi.

"Meow!" Eikichi said happily.

Mer followed the voice and found Kuwabara at the end of the block.

"Hey, Kuwabara!" she called. "I found your cat!"

Kuwabara turned around and looked at Mer and Eikichi. He quickly ran over to them.

"Eikichi!" he said happily.

"Meow!" Eikichi said as she jumped in her owner's arms.

"Hey, thanks for finding Eikichi, Mer," Kuwabara said as Eikichi began to lick his face. "Heh heh. Mer, do you know that in Egypt, cats were treated like royalty?"

Mer's eyes grew a couple of inches wider at the last statement.

'What made him say that?' she thought.

"Um, I did not know that, Kuwabara." she said in an intimidated tone.

"Yeah, and in Egypt there are a bunch of pyramids and dead guys and tombs and stuff," he continued. "All the old paintings on the tombs do the sand dance, doncha know?"

"Umm..."

"And if they move too quick-"

"Oh Way Oh!" Eikichi said in a little kitty fashion.

Mer looked down at the cat with a look of complete shock on her face.

"They fall down like dominoes!" Kuwabara continued.

"AHHHHHHHHHH!!!!" Mer screamed as she ran away from Kuwabara.

Kuwabara looked down at his kitten.

"Gee, what's her problem?" he asked.

"Me yow yow." Eikichi said as she shrugged her shoulders.

***
After three minutes, Mer stopped running to catch her breath.

"Oh god, I HAVE to get out of this town!" she said shakily. "Everybody has gone completely MAD!!"

Suddenly, she felt a hand on her shoulder.

"Mer?" a voice said.

"AHHHHHHHH!!!" Mer said as she twisted around to see who it was.

"WHAT?!?"

"Mer?"

"WHAT?!?"

"MER!"

"WHAT?!?!?!?"

"Whoa, whoa, calm down!"

Mer took a few deep breaths and looked at who was talking to her. It was Shizuru. She didn't notice that she stopped running in front of the Kuwabara household.

"Why are you so jumpy?" Shizuru asked Mer. "You look and sound like you're high on caffeine."

"Shizuru," Mer said as she grabbed her by her shirt and dragged her to her level. "Oh Shizuru, you have to help me! Everybody, Yusuke, Keiko, Kurama, Botan, Koenma, Yukina, Kuwabara, even the freakin' cat have gone totally insane!!!"

"What do you want me to do about it?"

"I don't know, anything!!!!!"

"Do you know why they're acting the way they are?"

"No, I don't know why they're speaking the lyrics of 80s songs in a casual, calm manner as if everything was normal!!"

"No is not an answer. One that I might try to understand you see."

"Eh?"

"You should find out why they're acting like this. What you don't know might hurt you."

"AHHHHHHHHH!!!!" and Mer was running once again.

She ran past Yusuke's apartment and saw Atsuko leaning out the window, a sake bottle in hand. She appeared to be suffering from a hangover.

"EV'RYBODY WANG CHUNG TONIGHT!!" she said in a drunk fashion. She then passed out over the window sill.

"AHHHHHHHHH!!!!" and Mer ran for the next couple of hours.

***
It was about 11:55 PM when Mer stopped running. At the time, the sky was dark blue and a full moon was out. Mer sat down on a step outside somebody's house and gazed at the moon.

"Yusuke... Keiko... Kurama," she said slowly and calmer then before. "Botan... Koenma... Yukina... Kuwabara and Eikichi... Shizuru... Atsuko... Hiei... they've all gone insane," suddenly, she realized something. "Wait a second, I haven't seen Hiei today. I wonder where he is..."

Mer heard a wolf howl in the distance once she said her last sentence.

"I didn't know wolves lived around here." she said. Then she saw something coming down the street, something amazing, something unbelievable.

It was a very, very short person. This person was being followed by about one hundred more people. Mer stood up, looked down the street, and squinted as an attempt to improve her vision in the darkness.

"What the hell?"

The short person finally stepped into the moonlight and music burst out of nowhere. It was Hiei! He was in his demon form and was wearing that red outfit that Michael Jackson wore in the "Thriller" video. The people who were following him were mindless humans he obviously took control of using his Jagan.

Mer's mouth hung wide open as she watched Hiei doing a bunch of Michael Jackson moves and the humans following him. He finally broke into song:

"It's close to midnight and something evil's lurkin' in the dark
Under the moonlight you see a sight that almost stops your heart
You try to scream
But terror takes the sound before you make it
You start to freeze
As horror looks you right between the eyes
You're paralyzed
'Cause this is thriller
Thriller night
And no one's gonna save you from the beast about to strike
You know it's thriller
Thriller night
You're fighting for your life inside a
Killer, thriller tonight..."

About 14 minutes later...

" 'Cause this is Thriller
Thriller night
Girl, I can thrill you more
Than any ghost would ever dare try
Thriller
Thriller night
So let me hold you tight
And share a
Killer, Thriller.. OH!!"

Hiei continued dancing strong as Vincent Price's voice came out of nowhere.

"Darkness falls across the land
The midnight hour is close at hand
Creatures crawl in search of blood
To terrorize y'awls neighborhood."

"Oh come on, this is getting ridiculous now," Mer spoke up. "And... and I thought Vincent Price was dead!"

"Shut up, girl, you're ruining the mood," the Vincent Price voice said. "Now where was I? Oh yeah:

And whosoever shall be found
Without the soul for getting down
Must stand and face the hounds of hell
And rot inside a corpse's shell."

Mer dropped to her knees and grabbed her head in between her hands.

"It's official," she said. "The cast of Yu Yu Hakusho is mentally ill. They've gone totally 80's," suddenly, Mer let go of her head and looked up.

"Totally 80s... THAT'S IT!! The whole cast of Yu Yu Hakusho, reciting lyrics from random 80's songs. It's the perfect plot for a fanfic! I shall call it, 'YYH Goes Totally 80s!' I have no idea why they're doing it, but I'll make that part up! Oh yeah, this is gonna be great!" then Mer got up and began to run down the block, back to America to write her story.

"Psst Hiei, is she gone yet?"

"Yeah, she just took off."

"All right, it's safe to come out everyone!"

Yusuke, Keiko, Kurama, Botan, Koenma, Yukina, Kuwabara (with Eikichi), Shizuru, and Atsuko came out of a nearby bush.

"Oh, that was so sweet!" Yusuke said, a large grin on his face. "I LOVE pulling pranks on our fans! It's so much fun to freak them out."

"Yeah, this was one of our best ones ever!" Kuwabara agreed. "We got the shrimp to dress up like Wacko Jacko!"

Botan looked over at Hiei and began to laugh uncontrollably.

"Oh boy, this is priceless!" she said, still laughing. "How did you get him to agree to this, Kurama?"

Kurama began to laugh lightly.

"I promised him a bathtub full of chocolate ice cream." he said. Just then, he noticed Hiei coming toward him. He was now in his regular form, but still wearing the outfit.

"Yes you did, and because I sang and danced like a buffoon in the middle of the street for fourteen minutes, I think I deserve it." he said in a harsh tone.

"I'll get it to you tomorrow, I promise."

"Hn. You better."

Then out of nowhere, Keiko took out a camera and snapped a picture of Hiei.

"HEY! WHAT THE HELL DO YOU THINK YOU'RE DOING?!" he screamed.

"Heh heh, sorry Hiei," Keiko said as she tried to stifle her laughter. "But when's the next time we're ever gonna see you dressed up like Michael Jackson?"

"I should have turned you into a demon when I had the chance," he murmured. "I just realized something. There's no reason for us to be celebrating. In the end, the girl was happy that this happened. She has a new plot for her fanfic. In a way, we really failed."

"Who cares, it was still funny," Yusuke said. "Hey Keiko, remember Mer's face when we started talking about Billie Jean?"

"Heh, that's nothing," Kurama cut in as he started laughing. "You should have seen what she looked like when I told her to step off that crack!"

"And I have to admit, it was quite amusing when she ran screaming from the park when the lightning crashed down," Yukina brought up. "I was actually trying to make a blizzard, the thunder and lightning was just luck!"

"Yeah and her eyes bugged right out of her sockets when my Eikichi started talking!" Kuwabara said.

"Yeah!" said Eikichi. Everybody started to laugh hysterically.

"I hope another fan comes real soon!" Yusuke said. "Well, good night everybody!"

"Good night!" and everybody went their separate ways.

Kuwabara went over to Yukina and smiled.

"Hey, Yukina, do you think I can, uhh, walk you home?" he asked kind of shyly.

Yukina blushed and smiled at him. "I would really like that, Kazuma." she replied. Hiei quickly went over to them before they took even one step.

"I don't trust you alone with her," he said roughly. "So I suppose I'll join you on your walk."

"Normally I'd tell you to get lost, but its not every day you get to walk with Wacko Jacko!" Kuwabara said as he began to laugh all over again.

"Quit calling me that, it's really annoying!"

They began to walk down the block, Kuwabara on Yukina's left side and Hiei on her right.

"Wacko Jacko!"

"Shut up!"

"Wacko Jacko!"

"Shut up!"

"Wacko Jacko!"

"Oh forget it."

Then Hiei turned around and the camera froze on his three glowing yellow eyes. Vincent Price was then heard as the camera zoomed up on Hiei.

"AHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA, AHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA, HAHAHAHAHAHA!!"

THE END


Disclaimer: I do not own Yu Yu Hakusho. Nor do I own any of the songs used in this story.

I want to give credit to the people that originally performed these songs. Had it not been for them, there would have been no story. Here we go:

Yusuke Urameshi and Keiko Yukimura- "Billie Jean" by Michael Jackson
Kurama- "Whip It" by Devo
Koenma and Botan- "I'm So Excited" by The Pointer Sisters
Yukina- "Birds Fly (Whisper to a Scream)" by Icicle Works
Kazuma Kuwabara and Eikichi- "Walk Like an Egyptian" by The Bangles
Shizuru Kuwabara- "What You Don't Know" by Expose
Atsuko Urameshi- "Everybody Have Fun Tonight" by Wang Chung
Hiei- "Thriller" by Michael Jackson and rap by Vincent Price