Warning: The author is not responsible for any murders/injuries/maimings as a result of following these examples.
Zeus:
1) Sign him up for parental care classes
2) Tell Hera about all his current love interests
3) Tell him Nico got Thalia pregnant
4) Tell him turning his children into pine trees is bad parenting
5) Send him a letter signed by Hera, calling him 'the best brother in the world'
6) Call him a mama's boy.
7) Steal his lightning bolt, then tell him Thalia did it.
8) Constantly remind him that a 16 year old boy won a war that he (an all-powerful god) could not.
9) Say that both sea travel and shadow traveling are better modes of transport than air travel
10) Tell him Poseidon and Hades are better fathers than him
11) Give him parenting books (such as Fatherhood for Dummies, and The Joys of Parenthood)
