Literati: And In Came a Heatwave; a Merciful Save.
Jess hears a knock at the door, but he keeps washing his grass-green cereal bowl.
"Just a sec!" he hollers over the sounds of soap and water and scrubbing.
No point in putting it in the dishwasher, one cereal bowl.
He has trained himself to be neat, now that he lives alone.
Tuesday morning. The oven clock reads 10:10.
It is his day off to do nothing.
He opens the door.
He sees Rory and he smiles. He doesn't even have a moment to think of it. His face does the work for him.
His heart beats frantically in his chest. Maybe I should sit down?
"Hey," she says. "Rory," he says.
Their words topple into and over one another, fighting for room.
"Hey," he says again.
"Come in, come in...you're in Philly? Wow," he says, standing back enough so she can step into his apartment.
"I am in Philly," she says. She's so nervous, she wonders if he can tell. Probably.
"I see that," he says.
"My invisibility cloak hasn't been working at all lately...I'm gonna have to take this up with Dumbledore, don't you think?" she says, smiling and pointing her finger at him.
He laughs lightly.
"Let me go put a shirt on. Some pants too," he says, walking backwards, in his underwear.
"Okay," she says.
"Have a seat. I'll be right back," he says, pointing to his new couch.
"Hey Jess?" she says brightly.
"Yeah?" he asks. He is standing outside his bedroom door, looking back at her, fussing with his hair. He hasn't seen his reflection at all this morning. He wonders if he even looks remotely decent.
"Your apartment is really nice," she says. She is enraptured by the intimacy of the moment. They were friends, they dated, but she's never seen him without a shirt on before.
And the apartment is both cleaner and nicer than she thought it would be. Comfy.
"Thanks. Thank you," he says. He watches her toss down her bag and plop onto his couch.
He disappears into his room, his eyes nearly welling. That's never happened before.
He finds his clothes from last night. They are smoky and wrinkled and balled up next to his bed and he pulls them on. He takes a quick peek in his bedroom mirror and runs his hands through his hair again.
Rory.
That's what he hears in his head, on a loop.
Rory. She's here.
If he wasn't trying to play it so damn cool, he'd run out there, jump and plop next to her. Instead, he takes a deep breath and one last look at himself in the mirror and steps slowly back into her vision.
"Rory Gilmore," he says softly.
"Jess Mariano," she echoes back. He smells like smoke and soap and Jess. She's missed that.
"This feels like something out of a movie," he says.
"It does, doesn't it?"
"Tell me what you're doing here. In Philly, I mean. And how did you know where I lived?" he asks.
"Do you yahoo?" she says, mimicking his voice.
You looked it up.
"You looked it up," he laughs.
You looked it up.
"But not really. Really, I just asked Luke and he told me," she admits slyly.
Then she tells him about the Obama campaign. How she's writing articles for an online magazine. How she just got into Philly last night and has a free day before leaving tomorrow. How she couldn't think of being in Philly without looking for him. How it would feel like she was lying, in some way. How she'd feel like a phony.
But she doesn't tell him that she dreamt of them last night.
Together and tangled and kissing in the dark.
"I'm glad you came," he says.
"Me too," she says.
"Congrats on graduating Yale, by the way. And landing a sweet job. Next stop, world domination, right?"
"Looks like it," she says.
"And Lorelai and Luke? Everything's good?" he asks cautiously.
"Yes. They're so happy and cute together. It's almost gross," she says and nods.
"You know...his voice was almost chipper last time he called. I thought he had the wrong number," Jess says, looking over at her.
She's even prettier than she was last time he saw her. It's disarming. Maybe even a little annoying. Except, not.
"And so it's okay if I ask?" Jess says gently. He knows she knows what he means.
"You don't have to," she says.
He isn't sitting as close to her as he wants to be. They haven't touched.
"Logan and I broke up," she volunteers.
She nods.
He nods.
"Okay," he says.
"He proposed, actually," she says, looking down.
"Okay," he says slowly.
"I said No. That's it, really," she is still nodding.
"Oh," he says. It feels like something in his heart has exploded. His skin gets warmer and his tummy hurts a little. He wants to jump off of the couch. He wants to do run laps. He wants to bounce and he wants to touch her. He wants to hug her and smell her hair.
"Last time I saw you, you said you didn't deserve it. How I was treating you," she says.
She can still see it perfectly. His hair. It was different. And his Dinosaur Jr. t-shirt. His sad eyes.
He starts shaking his head, as if it will keep her from saying anything more.
"No. You did. And you were right. I'm sorry, Jess. It was a crappy thing to do and I shouldn't have tried to use you like that," she says.
"Hey. Really. Don't apologize. It's okay. I don't mind," he says calmly. He feels so far away, on the other side of his couch. When did the couch get this big?
"I was thinking we could...I don't know...maybe get dinner tonight?" she asks.
"Oh," he says again.
Of course, Rory. Of course I'll have dinner with you. There's nothing I'd like to do more than that, actually.
But instead, he just looks over at her.
"Is that weird?" Rory asks.
He shakes his head again.
"No! It's not weird. Not at all. I think part of me is still in shock, actually," he says.
He isn't one for filling the silence with words, but he wants to make sure she feels comfortable here. In his apartment. With him.
"I'm glad you're here, though. I can't say that with enough emphasis, so I won't even try...but you have no idea how glad I am that you're here. Right now," he says.
"Me too, Jess. But I mean, maybe you're seeing someone. You're probably seeing someone," she says, hopping up from the couch and backing towards the door.
She really hopes he's not seeing anyone. Last night she even prayed about it. She prayed for the first time in a really long time.
He jumps up too and grabs her hand without thinking.
"Wait. Just hold on a sec," he says.
He's holding my hand.
I'm holding her hand.
"I mean, are you seeing someone? Because it's not like I expected you to just be sitting around here waiting for me forever. I wouldn't assume that. I'd never..."
"Rory. It's okay," he says, not letting go of her hand.
She doesn't say anything.
But he does.
"And yes. I am seeing someone," he says carefully.
He wonders if what he sees in her eyes is disappointment. He looks away quickly.
"Of course," she says. This time she's the one shaking her head.
Of course. I wonder who she is.
"But that doesn't matter. That doesn't mean that we can't go to dinner. Let's do it. I have the whole day off," he says, slowly letting her have her hand back to herself.
And then he puts his arms out and she smushes into his chest. He wraps his arms around her and they are hugging like they always did.
I should've done this the moment I saw her. This is nice. This is normal.
I should've done this the moment I saw him. This is nice. This is normal.
They are turned away from each other, just hugging.
He's missed her so so much. And being this close to her? It's starting to hurt. He lets her go and stands back.
He shoves his hands into his pockets and looks at the rug on the floor, then back up at her.
"Okay," she smiles.
Rory walks over to his coffee table and starts going through his stack of books.
He leans against the door frame and watches her.
"Hey, can I make you some coffee?" he asks.
"Yes, please!" she says, sitting back on his couch with a lap full of paperbacks.
Jess heads into the kitchen.
"Okay. You got it," he says.
There is a picture of him and Tessa on the fridge.
He snatches it off and slides it into a random drawer.
Rory. She's here.
