Title: Taking over the world
Author: Native
Genre: Humor
Rating: K
Pairing: F!Shepard+Legion (friendship), others if you squint enough
Warning: Possible spoilers for ME1+ME2.


TAKING OVER THE WORLD
01. PATCH NOTES


Normandy, AI Core, Day 1 after the Omega 4 Relay, 10:00
- Alright, Legion. Let's do this. You have the patch notes we talked about? Because I've two years of new content to grind, and I will not do it without being prepared.

Normandy, AI Core, Day 1 after the Omega 4 Relay, 10:30
- What do you mean they nerfed the Battlemaster doomsday skill? What the fuck?

Normandy, AI Core, Day 1 after the Omega 4 Relay, 10:45
- Okay, maybe , maybe it was a bit overpowered, but damn. Hmpf. So... this new raid we were talking about? I heard the Nightmare mode is really something. Can't wait to kick some ass and climb up the rankings again. Eh.

Normandy, AI Core, Day 1 after the Omega 4 Relay, 11:15
- Hmm, hmm. So when the dragon spits his blue flame, we all gather together to share the damage? That's new. And nice, the old mechanics were starting to be repetitive.

Normandy, AI Core, Day 1 after the Omega 4 Relay, 12:00
- Eating is for the weak. Oooh, is that the new PvP zone?

Normandy, AI Core, Day 2 after the Omega 4 Relay, 00:00
- Sleeping is overrated. I really want to play the revamped RvR right now. What alliance is sleeping at this hour again?

Normandy, AI Core, Day 2 after the Omega 4 Relay, 06:00
- Damn, but this quest is well written. Thanks for the tissue. Wait, what are you doing with tissues anyway? No, don't

Normandy, AI Core, Day 2 after the Omega 4 Relay, 06:01
- ... answer that. You know what? I am going to kill some more boars now.

Normandy, AI Core, Day 2 after the Omega 4 Relay, 10:00
- "Shepard. Anderson on the vidcomm."
- Tell him to wait a sec, I'm in the middle of wiping those bastards from Twin Suns out of our guild fortress.

Normandy, AI Core, Day 2 after the Omega 4 Relay, 10:15
"Shepard."
- Come on! Legion, do you mind keeping an eye on Arashu for a while? If I log off at this hour, I'm sure to find a queue when I come back.

Normandy, Comm Room, Day 2 after the Omega 4 Relay, 10:50
- Now that you mention it, EDI, I'm famished . And this smell... is that spaghettis? Seriously? Hot damn, I hope the Guild Hall doesn't start to burn while I eat.

Normandy, Mess Hall, Day 2 after the Omega 4 Relay, 11h00
- What, Legion and me? Nah, we're totally fine. Had a bit of a scuffle with Twin Suns, but we totally smashed them, thanks to Caius' guild.

Normandy, Mess Hall, Day 2 after the Omega 4 Relay, 11h02
- ... and then Caius shielded me at just the right time - one second later, I'd have been dead, Garrus - and, the three of us, we finished Khamul. With the others 21 already down! It was epic, I tell you, epic. I really missed the guy.

Normandy, Mess Hall, Day 2 after the Omega 4 Relay, 11h04
- Nah, fun thing is? He's C-Sec. Told me he quit the military two years before you did, so probably a bit older than you.

Normandy, Mess Hall, Day 2 after the Omega 4 Relay, 11h06
- He's one of the first turian I ever knew. Well, I mean. Games are a formidable tool when it comes to gather people together, aren't they?

Normandy, Mess Hall, Day 2 after the Omega 4 Relay, 11h08
- Alright, I'm going to take a shower, work a bit. Later, crew.

Normandy, Med Bay, Day 2 after the Omega 4 Relay, 11h20
- Yes, EDI, I'm going to the AI Core. I am able to answer a few mails while crafting, you know.

Normandy, Med Bay, Day 2 after the Omega 4 Relay, 11h25
- Legion, you... went to get me a pillow and some covers?

- Perfect.