WTF IS FAIRYTAIL ON?
By simsgal
This fanfiction is rated T for teen because of some language and innuendos. If you get offended lol this is fanfic get over it
This is also a semi-parody meaning things will not make sense and I'll purposely write awful and spell names wrong for comedic effect (though I fail at it so I'll just look like an illiterate sh*t)
It's mosty a bunch of random shit. It takes place at random times—like it could be before the timeskip sometimes or after it sometimes. I'll usally state the arc or whatever.
Hell knows I don't own Fairytail. Belongs to Mr. Hiro Mashima.
CHAPTER ONE idk MARY SUE CHAPTER sure yeah
It was a quiet day in Fairytail. Knotsu and Grae were at eachothers throats again and Gooviya (pronounced Joo-via) was admiring from afar. Loosy was at the bar and Levee was reading a good book titled Fifty Shades of Mage. Gosheel was eating iron while doing pushups and lifting his cat, PantryDaisy on his back. Mirrorjane was wiping down the bar, silently humming a death chant. A door slam was heard and a beautiful girl stepped out of Master Moporoff's office. Grae and Knotsu and just about every guy in the guild turned to gawk at her.
She had long, dark brown wavy hair down to her knees, and porcelain skin her body was slim yet she had ample breasts and a nice butt her left eye was blue and strangely the right was green she wore a white short sleeve crop top with a leather pocket black high wasted leather shorts leather fingerless gloves and black leather combat boots her lips were in a frown, because of reasons no one knew yet. Suddenly Grae tried to walk over to her but Knotsu used his magic so he could go over instead.
Knot Dragon Slayer Magic: BOWTIE!
Grae was tied up quickly and dropped to the ground as Knotsu dashed over checked out the girl.
"Hey bitch I'm Natsu what your name?" he asked as she smiled.
" Jamie Hikari Sentia Katsumi Mayama Katyaka Hina Madusiko Satoshi. I really like guild it nice." She said loking around. "I glad I can join."
"Ur really pretty Jame Hikari Sentia Katsumi HOLY HELL YOU HAVE A LONG NAME" Knotsu said while gasping for air.
"Not as pritty as all the girls in the intire gild." She said lucking at Conna, Loosy, Gooviya, Mirrorjane, and erry1 else. Loosy smiled.
"Wow, ur really nice Jamie Hikari Sentia Katsumi okay f*ck this shit I'm calling you Mary Sue." She said while walking over from the bar. No one could believe how nice she was.
"I'm glad we're all best frins- thanks for lettin me join teem knotsu." She said jumping for joy.
"OKAY GUISE LETS GO ON A JOB—GRAE, KNOTSU, LOOSY, CHEERY, AND JAMIE HIKARI SENTIA KATSUME MAYAMA KATYAKA HINA MADUSIKO SATOSHI!" Airzah screamed as they all ran out to do a job.
They had to ride in carrije to get to evil gild to fite. Knotsu had got over moshun sick so Jamie sat in his lap giggle. Loosy wus so jelly steam was coming out of her ears. Airzuh was enjoy sum strawberry cake when she luk over to Jamie.
"Jamie—do u want my strawberry cake? You can have it I don wunt it." She said and Jamie gasped. She tuk cek and ate it really fast and she gain no weight at all.
When they got to the place Jamie gasped.
"I kno this place guise." She said beginning to sob.
I must git revenj on him she thought angrily as her eyes turned dark red.
Every1 was KO'd except fot Jamie Hikaria Sentia Katsumi Mayama Katyaka Mayama Madusiko Satashi. She was laying in the ground, her har cuver eyes as she stood up.
"wut majick u even do ur a weakling u know dat?" sed an eveil guyy "Tbh I rather take pics of ur butt not kick it." She snarled and wiped the blood from her nose.
"I tried to hold back but im finish."
CLONE MAGIC: DOUBLE!
Jamie smirk bc there was 2 of her. The guys mouth dropped as his eyes turned to hearts and he got a nose bleed bc there were 2 Jamies. Suddenlt, both joined hands.
UNISON RAID!
Even tho it was really hard for sum1 to do a unisun rayed she did it as a bright beam blind eveil guise and blew up entire guild except for Airzuh, Loosy, Grae, and Knotsu and Cheery. She then smiled and and went to her best friends.
"gud job mary. That was amazing." Loosy said chuckling.
"how are we get 2 gild?" grae said wincng at the immense pain in his ribs bc they were broken. Jamie noticed and gasped running over to him. she then kneeled over him and a blue magic circle appeared above his chest.
WIND MAGIC: HEAL!
She began to heal grae rilly fast bc she could use 2 magic.
"All better." She said standing up as he hugged her, aso stand up.
"thx." Knotsu's head got big and he got a red thingy in corner of hed.
"HOW WE GET BAK 2 GILD?" Jamie had a great idea. She dragged erry1 close and close eyes.
TELEPORT MAGIC: FAIRY TAIL GUILD
and in flash they were bak at guild and on the floor. They all stood up, and jamie healed them all but did not run out majick pwr. Airzuh was so amazed she walk over and pressed jamie head to her armur wit thud.
"ur amazing jamie, what is ur majick?" jamie eye turned lite blue as she begin to cry.
"well it curse frum witch put on me when I was a bby. She said when I get older I'd be uhlee af and fat bc I am ugly and fat." Airzuh gasped.
"NO UR NOT STFU UR BEAUTIFUL DON'T U KNOW THAT UR PERF LIKE I S2G" she said as she comfort jamie.
"yeah jamie ur our bff for life." Jamie smiled, erryone was being so nice on her first day.
"I do majick majick." Master eye widen.
"MAJICK MAJICK? HOLY SH*T BITCH!" he said as his eyes got big.
"it when I do all majick in world ever invented." Master smirked.
"Only one person in the entire world can do majick majick." Jamie blushed lookin down.
"dat me." She beamed. "I do ice, fire, knot, loose , air, wind, con, god slayer, dragon slayer, universe slayer, all script, art, writing, reading, breathing, eating singing, making ppl fall in luv wit me magic. I do soap magic, draw majik, orlando majik, and I do all other majik." She then put her face down.
"only magic I cant do is mary sue magic im so weak, I bet is suck." She began yo scream cry .
"no u stronk jamie." Suddenly a bang was herd err1 ran out and saw attak frum evil gild. Wif a blast everry1 was KO'd essept for jamie who blok attack with nullify majick and then she began fly with aero majick. She then used god slayer magick to kill everyone with a single kick and her outfits also transfrom with diff majick so now she wore a light blue long sleeve shir wit rip on side white booty short and her hair became bright blonde woth blue streaks and her eyes turned gold and her feet were bare she wore a gold cape had a glowing gold aura. She went back downt to ground and heal everybody and still had magick power. Everyone thank her and they all went back inside for ceremony.
" I say something important." Master says smiling.
"jamie is s class wizurd now even tho it her furst day." Everyone clapped and cheered for her as she cry tears of joy.
"but why—I bad at majick." Knotsu came up behind her n smack her but then smile mischeiously.
"no ur great u save world good job jamie." They were about to kiss when suddenly Zeref ran in.
"NO GOD DAMMIT SHE IS A F*CKING MARY SUE STOP IT RIGHT NOW I S2G I WILL END YOU WTF WHY DO YOU ALL TALK LIKE FOOLS DO YOU EVEN GRAMMAR IN THE NAME OF FANFICTION CUT THIS SHIT OUT RIGHT THE F*CK NOW OR I WILL SUMMON ACNOLOGIA ON UR SAGGY ASSES." He said while getting a dark ball of majick In hand. He then threw it at jamie and she cud not dodge but knotsu got in the way and die for her as she cried.
"KNOTSU NOOO!" she then power up and got mad .
"No sorry bitch." Zeref said as he threw another dark orb of darkness at her it her her she died painfully the end.
