102 Reasons NOT to sack your manservant:
You will have no one to polish your armour
You will have no one to wash your clothes
You will have no one to scrub your chamber floors
You will have no one to sharpen your sword
You will have no one to banter with
You will have no one you can call an 'idiot'.
You will have no one you can call a 'girl's petticoat'
You will have no one you can throw things at
You will have to survive without soup
You will have no one to yell at when you are in a foul mood
You will have no one you can ask to 'shut up'.
You will have no one to help you get into your armour
You will have no one to moan to
You will have no one to moan about
You will have no one you can praise on the odd occasion
You will have no one left that you can threaten with a spoon
You will have no one left that you can attack with a spoon
You will have no one left that can insult you without getting thrown in the stocks
You will have no one left to shout at for playing 'hide and seek' during an ambush in the forest.
You will have no one who gets worried when you claim that you are thinking.
You will have no one who can prepare rat for your dinner.
You will have no one who sneezes and scares off prey during a hunting session
You will have no one who claims that their only skill is 'putting up with you!'
You will have no one you can chuck a bucket of cold water at
You will have no one that you can 'demonstrate' cleaning to.
You will have no one to tell you it's funny when you get beaten by a girl
You will have no one to wake you in the middle of the night by hiding under your bed and calling your name in a whisper.
You will have no one who can turn a gargoyle statue into a pet dog.
You will never know anyone else who can survive a Dorocha attack.
You will have no one who will ignore your orders to do something that might actually work better
You will have no one who will spend too much time in the tavern.
You will have no one to call you a 'Clot pole'
You will have no one to call you a 'cabbage head'
You will have no one to blame if you fall off your horse
You will have no one you can actually explain yourself to.
You will have no one to prevent your death in Melee or jousting tournaments
You will have no one to save your life on a weekly basis
You will have no one to warn you of traitors
You will have no one to ignore on more than one occasion
You will have no one that you can admit you are wrong to.
You will have an angry Gaius to contend with
You will have an angry Hunith to contend with
You will have an angry dragon to contend with
You will have no one to stalk suspicious people
You will have no one to prevent you from doing stupid things
You will find battles harder
You will perish at the hands of your evil sister
You will have no one to annoy you by asking frequent questions
You will have Excalibur taken off of you
You will have no one to whisper spells behind your back
You will have no one who can contact a dragon is desperate situations
You will never realise that magic can be good
You will have no one to persuade you otherwise
You will have no one to survey council meetings from the corner of the room
You will have no one to accompany you when you get lost or separated from the knights
You will have no one to scold for random things
You will have no one who can single handily stop a dragon attack
You will have no one who can block an army by making a fire spread and work as a shield
You will have no one who can ward off wyvern
You will have no observant people left
You will have no one who can cure you from a magical fever
You will have no one who can communicate with the Druids
You will have no one that you can blame for not keeping a secret
You will have no one left who can accidentally release a goblin
You will have no one left who can catch a goblin
You will have no one who forgets to knock
You will have no one you have to remind to knock
You will have no one who can fool you more than once
You will have no one who questions your actions
You will never know anyone else who can juggle effortlessly but not catch random things you throw at them
You will have no one to rescue you from an enchantment
You will have no one who can prevent arranged marriages
You will have no one to guide you through impenetrable forests
You will have no one who can smuggle an escape rope to your chambers
You will have no one who can't hold onto the escape rope that you are abseiling with.
You will have no one who can save your father from a mandrake root
You will have no one left who actually appears to still have their mum
You will have no one who screams your name when you are in trouble
You will have no one who is willing to set up a romantic picnic when you want to go on a date with a girl
You will have no one to brush the moose head on your chamber wall
You will have no one who trips over tents in the middle of a battlefield at night a miraculously wakes no one up
You will have no one to kill off evil uncles
You will have no one to kill off evil half-sisters
You will have no one to check for woodworm
You will have no one to hug who is covered from head to foot in mud
You will have no one to tell you that you got up from the wrong side of the table
You will have no one to retrieve the cup of life
You will have no one to destroy an immortal army
You will have no one to give you your Pudsey teddy bear at night
You will have no one to steal your sausages
You will have no one to suggest you are getting fat
You will have no one to blame if you get caught in a net
You will have no one to flatten bandits with trees
You will have no one who can turn you into a simpleton without warning
You will have no one who can gain hospitality from smugglers
You will have no one who can age extremely quickly
You will have no one who magically pulls your trousers down to steal your keys
You will have no one who is scared of their own shadow
You will have no one who raids people's wardrobes
You will have no one to save you from being an ass
You will never be in the presence of a man with such a great destiny again
You will NEVER know ANYONE like Merlin!
Arthur placed the long scroll down on his desk and rubbed his sore eyes from all the reading he had just done before looking up at his manservant who was grinning hopefully at him.
"You really are an idiot aren't you Merlin?" He sighed.
"One of my many talents sire!" Merlin replied.
"What even gave you the impression I was going to sack you in the first place?" Arthur frowned as he stood and folded his arms, awaiting an answer.
"Oh, it was just in case you forgot how important I was." Merlin replied simply before walking out of Arthur's chambers. Arthur just shook his head before returning to his seat and reading the incredibly long scroll once more.
