Author's note: I am certain that the 79 people who read my last story and yet did not see fit to write even the shortest and most unprofessional of reviews shall abstain from reading the story which follows. After all, two episodes of William Stock's wearisome world in which nothing interesting ever occurs is far enough for any human being. Very well, then, but I beseech you to read the first paragraph of what I assure you is a perfectly uninteresting and boring story, like the two that preceded it. It truly bears testament to the ridiculously boring nature of the show, in which nothing exciting ever takes place, and stands as an excellent motivation for you to never read another dull and mundane William Stock story as you merrily march off and find another, more interesting story to spend your time with.

The Royal Family of New Orleans

Episode 3:

A Rude Awakening

Airdate:

March 2, 2011

A sack lay in the waters of the bayou of New Orleans on the night of February 3, 1928. This sack contained a 25-year old Negro, capable of breathing only by a large hole in the sack. She was still asleep, though presently the growling of alligators and the hissing of snakes awoke her, which are not at all pleasant noises to awake to, nor was she in a pleasant place to be awakened in.

She saw filthy green water flowing in through the hole in the sack. At seeing this, she uttered a loud cry, and jumped up, hitting her head on the sack and knocking her down, and causing the sack to turn over into the water. She saw a large crab in the waters below. She then threw her head out of the water and screamed, "OH, MY GOD! OH, MY GOD! OH, MY GOD! OH, MY FUCKING GOD! WHAT THE FUCK IS HAPPENING? OH, MY FUCKING GOD! OH, MY FUCKING GOD!"

She looked up and took in the sight of the forest all around the bayou which she currently resided in, causing her to scream, "HOLY FUCKING SHIT!" She then uttered a high-pitched yell which continued for quite a while before she realized that whoever had done this to her might still be near.

She then saw rippling in the waters ahead of her and to the sides of her, then turned around to see similar rippling behind her. She looked underwater and beheld the dark brown shapes of numerous alligators. "HOLY SHIT!" she cried as she jumped up and ran forward, falling below in the water, which she now struck savagely as she moved toward the shore.

She kicked her legs out to propel her forward, accidentally hitting two alligators. She then turned over and swung her legs around frantically, which struck a number of the alligators, which made them scream in pain. She continued to propel herself forward and jumped onto the shore. An alligator jumped up and grabbed hold of her leg in his teeth, but she turned around and kicked him hard with the other one, screaming very loudly as she did so.

She ran several feet away into the bushes, then panted wildly as she looked around in all directions for any dangerous prey.

A large crane ran away through the trees at her arrival. Several birds above her flew away, as well. She then ran off through the forest as fast as she could. She soon entered a clearing and walked up the trail, her heart beating wildly as she wondered if she might never escape the forest and be devoured by some dangerous beast.

She wandered on and on up the trail aimlessly for quite some time. Now, she stopped to catch her breath. Only then did she notice other footsteps trodding on through the forest, formerly mingled with her own. She then heard coughing, and the raspy voice of an old Negro woman crying, "Damn it! Ah can't hear de futsteps, Juju!" She panicked, running off at an alactritous pace.

"Dere dey is, Juju!" the voice roared, which provoked a scream as she ran off into bushes, then ducked off into another clearing. She then heard hissing of a snake, which made her heart race. At last, she could take no more. She had no idea where she was going through dangerous woods which were filled with animals which might kill her. At last, she flung herself down onto the ground, held her hand in her hands, eyes shut, and awaited her death.

The hissing continued, as the old woman's voice said, "Tru dere, Juju?"

Hissing followed that question, and she now heard the bushes part as the figure drew near, coughing on its way. The footsteps soon ceased.

"Wut ya doin'?" the voice yelled. At this, she jumped, but did not uncover her eyes. She then felt her chin being grabbed and her eyes plucked open, and she then beheld the wrinkled face of an old Negro woman dressed in white robes. She screamed at the sight of the figure, which provoked a laugh.

"Done yu woree nun, child! Mama Odie ain't gon' hur' chu!" the woman assured her.

A large green snake stood at her feet.

The old woman took the young woman's hand and helped her up. The old woman's hand was filled with dirt, crumbs, and grime. "Ah wone hurt yu, child, ah promis!" She laughed again, then fell into a coughing fit, which she followed by clearing her throat. "Cum wid Mama Odie, an' yill be 'al ride."

The young woman sighed. She decided she had no reason not to, since she would die, anyway, if she ran off.

The old woman laughed as the snake wrapped itself around her face as she continued on through the forest. The old woman coughed several times as they made their way through the dark forest, her lungs filling with the night air. The young woman found herself coughing, as well.

Soon, they arrived at the door to a large tree which had been built into a house. The young woman looked up at the chimney from which smoke rose into the night sky.

The old woman took a key from her robes and let go of the young woman's hand as she kneeled down to unlock the door which had been cut into the tree. As she did so, Juju fell off her shoulders onto the ground. After the door was unlocked, the old woman took the young woman's hands again and entered. Juju crawled through the doorway, only to be shut in the door after Mama Odie pushed it closed.

The young woman's eyes widened, and her mouth hung open, concerned. "Uh..."

Juju pushed the door open and crawled toward them as the old woman stopped to remove her eyeballs.

The young woman uttered a loud cry of shock as the old woman placed her eyeballs in a jar. "Holy shit!" she screamed, her eyes wide and her jaw dropped, both shocked and somewhat terrified. "Why the hell did you just take your fucking eyes out?"

The old woman laughed. "Lordee, I soitenly not gwineter lug dose damn dins roun' all day, chile!" With that said, she led the young woman into a wooden chair which sat among others by the large fireplace in the center of the room.

"I'm Mama Odie," the old woman told her, picking up a long brown pipe from the arm of another chair. She then took her tobacco from a bowl which stood on the desk and kneaded it into the pipe. "So, wut de hell wuz yu doin' out dere in the midul 'a da night?"

"Um, I..." The young woman cleared her throat. "I really don't fucking know. I just woke up in a sack in the fucking bayou and I just barely got the hell out of there before the alligators got me."

"Ah." Mama Odie laughed as she walked over to a desk which stood nearby, and took a match from a pot which stood on it. "Ya got 'nee adee 'oo de 'el mide 'a taken ya oud 'ere?"

"Um, no. Actually, I don't," the young woman said nervously. She cleared her throat again as Mama Odie sat down next to her and cracked her toes. "It's awfully queer."

Mama Odie's mouth hung open, now sensing the severity of the situation. "Sc'ree, too!" she said, then placed the pipe between her teeth.

Juju slithered over and stuck his head up onto the arm of her chair. Mama Odie struck her match on his face and held it into her pipe. "Ya sure yu don't got no a'dee hoo did it?" she asked as smoke rose into the coughing snake's face. She then dropped the match over the side of the armchair. Juju hurriedly spit on it, putting it out.

"No, I-I-I really don't," the young woman said as Mama Odie turned to face her.

"Gud Lord! Wut's yer name?" Mama Odie puffed at her pipe as she waited for a response.

"Uh..." The young woman coughed slightly as smoke from the pipe flew into her face. "Catherine Burwell."

Juju lifted his head up onto the armchair again as Mama Odie took the pipe from her lips and exhaled smoke out of the corner of her mouth into the snake's face, causing him to cough again.

"An' w'ere duz yu live?" Mama Odie asked, then cracked her neck.

"I... I live..." Catherine coughed into her hand as smoke flew into her face. "I live near the bayou, a few blocks away."

"An' yu jest goes tuh bed an' fines yerself 'ere?"

"That's, uh... That's right." Catherine coughed some more.

"Damn! Ain't dat sum'tin', Juju?" Mama Odie turned around and grabbed Juju by the neck, pulling her up into the chair. She turned back to Catherine and tossed Juju away, who careened into a skillet which hung on the wall, which then fell on his face after he had landed on the floor. "I reckin sumbudee's ou' da git ya, chile."

"I know! I'm fucking scared!"

"Yu fuckin' shud be! Ya know no wun 'oo 'ud wan' to?" Mama Odie asked.

Catherine tapped her chin, thinking. "Hmm. No, not really. But before I went to bed, I had my 25th birthday party, and a shitload of my friends was there with me, but I don't see why the hell none of them would wanna do me in." The old woman listened patiently, puffing at her pipe, which formed a great cloud of smoke that filled the air around them.

"Is yu real pop'ler in town?"

"No, no, not really." Catherine coughed into her hand again as smoke continued to fill the air. "But I do have a shitload of friends."

"Mebbe de Klan herd 'bout yer birthday party an' 'cided to kill yu after it ended."

Catherine gasped. "You know, you may be right."

"Yu met dose bas'ters 'fore?" Mama Odie asked.

"Um, no. They... They ain't targeted me." She coughed into her hand again. "But they have killed one of my friends before."

"'Hoo?"

"When I was a child in Georgia, they killed my friend, Marissa Persimmon, but I ain't met them since then."

"Hmm," Mama Odie said, and puffed at her pipe some more. "Well, yeh'd be s'prised wut 'dem Klan bas'derds'll do. B'leev me, I knows. I seen 'em roun' sixty-tree times in my live. Sum'times, 'dey'll jest go to big towns lukin' for blaks teh kil, an' New O'leens sher as 'el is a big town."

"Yes. You may be right."

"Well, ah reckon yu shud stay the night, chile. Okay?" the old woman asked as Juju slithered up.

"Well, okay. I guess I might as well," Catherine agreed.

"Good," the old woman said, and tipped her pipe upside down so the tobacco accidentally fell onto Juju's head, and she then placed the pipe face-down on the table, cleared her throat, and stood up, taking Catherine's hand again. She got a bowl of water and walked to the fireplace. "Ah'll show ya were yu ken stay if yeh jest wait," she said, then poured the water over her shoulder, dousing Juju as well as the fireplace.

She then coughed as she walked around the room turning the kerosene lamps down and putting out the candles. She walked to the doorway. "Cum up 'ere," she told Catherine as she squeezed out a candle's flame that lay by the stairs. She took Juju in her hands and walked up the stairs with Catherine, putting out the candles as she passed them.

Once they reached the top of the stairs, they found themselves in a long hallway filled with more candles and kerosene lamps. There was one door at one end of the hall a few inches to the left of the stairway, one door in the middle of the hall, and another at the end of the hall.

"Dis is my gast room," Mama Odie said, pointing to the doorway at the end of the hall. "An' dis room is mine an' Juju's." She pointed to the door in the middle of the hall,

then took Catherine into the guest room (hitting Juju's head on the top of the door on the way in).

It had one bed built of wood in the middle of it with a worn-out mattress that was clearly sewn from some sort of material from the bayou, and had a worn-out pillow made of similar material. There were wooden desks with candles on them, a few of which Mama Odie now lit so that Catherine could see the room better.

"Lord, yu wud in b'leev how menee pepul 'av staied in dis room ova da yeas," Mama Odie told her.

"I would," Catherine told her.

"Dere is majes in dat pot," Mama Odie said, pointing to one that stood on a desk on the left-hand side of the bed. A candle stood beside it. "Well, yu jes' col me if ya need nuttin els."

"I will." Catherine to got in the bed and pulled the blanket (which seemed to made of materials from the bayou, and was very itchy) over her. A candle stood on the desk beside the pot of matches.

"Yu can reed dis if yu wants," Mama Odie told her, and took a worn-out first-edition copy of Henry Fielding's The Journey of a Voyage to Lisbon from the floor. Catherine looked over the side of the bed, and saw a large pile of old books lying on the floor. "Wel, g'bye now," Mama Odie said as she left the room and shut the door, Juju wrapped around her shoulders.

After the door was shut, the room was still well-lit with the many candles that lay about.

Catherine took a deep breath, still at unease over all that had happened to her. She wondered if it would be safe returning to her house, for if the Klan discovered she was alive, she might be targeted again. She then realized fully how terrifying an experience it was. The Klan had broken into her house, grabbed her from her bed, stuffed her in a sack (which had evidently been torn by accident) and taken her into the bayou and thrown her in a swamp. She attempted to relax. After all, she doubted the Klan would return to the bayou since they believed her dead, and they would most likely not know of the house, so she decided to look at the books on the floor. She picked up the first one, which read Tracts in Divinity by William Hawkins, and looked to be the oldest of all the books, with a broken spine and pages which were torn and split at the middle of the book. The second was Edward Search's The Light of Nature Pursued, then Henry James Pie's Elegies. All of them seemed boring as she went through them until she reached a copy of Mark Twain's Life on the Missisppi. She placed it on the bed, then took the candle from the desk and placed it on the arm of the bed. She took a match from the pot, struck it on the chair arm, and lit the candle. She held the candle close to the book as she opened the book with the other. The main page had scribbled a note: Property of Matthew Stevens.

She read the first chapter, which she enjoyed greatly, then placed it on the floor in the pile with the others, blew out the candle and lay back. Soon, she was in blissful slumber.

()()()()

Morning came, and dawn spread over the city of New Orleans.

On this morning, a negro named Margo who was a friend of Catherine's, awoke from her sleep at 7:04, had breakfast from 7:16 to 7:25, and set off for Catherine's house at 7:27, arrived at 7:51, and knocked on the door. There was no answer.

"Hello? Cathy!" Margo yelled, rapping her knuckles on the door. "Yo, Cathy! Are y'all in there?"

She grabbed hold of the doorknob and turned it. It opened.

Margo paused, frozen at the door, now feeling awkward for having thrown open her friend's door. She felt even more guilty as she remembered how late the party had lasted, and how Catherine may have gotten to bed late, and now may have been awoken by Margo. She decided, that since it was Saturday, she would leave and hope Catherine had not awoken, so she did so.

()()()()

An hour and 14 minutes later, another negro friend of Catherine's named Georgia walked up to Catherine's house and rang the doorbell (Margo had not, due to personal preference). There was, of course, no answer.

Georgia remembered how late the party had lasted, and decided to leave her friend to sleep, as well.

()()()()

At 2:03, Margo had invited two of her other friends over and talked over tea, then she had spent time cleaning the house for quite a few hours before she decided that Catherine must have awoken by now, and went back to the house. She knocked on the door once more, but there was no reply again.

"Goddamn it, Cathy! You're certainly not going to sleep all day!" Margo yelled, frustrated.

She ran around the back of the house with the intent of looking through Catherine's bedroom window. When she reached the window, however, she gasped and thrust her hands to her mouth, for she saw that the window had been broken open and Catherine's blanket lay on the floor.

"Goddamn it! What the hell happened?" she yelled to no one in particular, but rather out of sheer shock.

She ran to the front of the house, opened the door, and ran into the living room. A telephone hung on the wall, the earpiece of which Margo then seized. "Operator, get me Karen Winters on the phone." Her heart raced as she thought of her poor friend, Catherine, being tortured by the Klan. What if such a fate awaited her one night? During the time in which she was forced to wait, her heart raced as she thought of her poor friend, Catherine, being tortured by the Klan. What if such a fate awaited her one night? Margo was filled with terror, for you always hear of bad things happening to other people, but you always seem to feel that they could never happen to anyone close to you.

At last, Karen's voice came through the earpiece. "Hello."

At the sound of Karen's voice, Margo became filled with excitement, spilling out the news all at once. "Karen! Karen, oh, am I glad you're there! Listen, I just came to see Cathy, and I had come earlier but I thought she was asleep because of how late the party went on..."

"Uh-huh?"

"But I came back now at 2:00, and she still didn't answer the door, so I went around to the back and her bedroom window was broken open!"

"Shit." Karen's voice was filled with shock now.

"Yeah!" Margo yelled. "And the fucking blanket was ripped off her bed!"

"And she was missing?"

"Yes!"

"Shit, that's terrible! So the Klan musta done it, right?"

"Yes! I mean, Cathy sure as hell didn't have no enemies! Right?"

"No. I-I don't think she did. But then again, you never can tell..."

"Well, I knew her awfully well, Karen, and I know she didn't have no goddamn enemies, so it must have been the fucking Klan!"

"Oh, my fucking God! This is horrible!" Karen cried, her voice filled with appalled shock.

"I know! Ain't it?"

"Well, why in the hell did you call me, Margo? Call the fucking police, for Christ's sake!" Karen shrieked, now panicked.

Margo realized the illogicalness of her plan as she held her elbow under her chin. "Oh, my God, you're right! I don't know why the hell I didn't think of that!"

"Although it ain't like they'll care much about a negro's death."

"No, I guess they won't," Margo sighed. "But it seems just the right kind of thing to do to tell them."

"Well, do it, then. I'll get off the line," Karen suggested, and hung up.

"Operator, connect me with the police," Margo instructed.

()()()()

Soon, a police car arrived, and 2 police officers got out and began inspecting the window. Inside the living room, Margo, Karen, and Georgia stood and looked around the room, their mouths dangling open, as they were filled with fear.

"Golly," Georgia started. "I-I really can't believe it. I mean, damn. The Klan just fucking breaks into a random Negro's house and fucking kidnaps her?"

"And the police don't give a shit," Margo added.

Karen sighed. "These are bad times we live in."

"It sure as hell weren't for Tiana!" Georgia remarked. "I mean, she became the Queen of an entire fucking country!"

"Yeah. That is awfully surprising," Karen commented.

"Tiana said it's 'cause Maldonia ain't as racist as the U.S."

"Sometimes, I feel ashamed of our country," Karen admitted.

"Sister, nobody blames you," Georgia assured her, putting a hand on her shoulder.

The two police officers came in. They were both tall white men.

"Well, it seems like an open-and-shut case, girls," one of them said. "The Klan came in and kidnapped one of you niggers, and there ain't a goddamn thing we can do about it." He was a tall, fat man with a round face and a thin mustache.

"Or would like to, for that matter," the other added. He was a short man, only somewhat thinner than his partner, with blue eyes and a thin face.

Karen's jaw dropped with shock. "Honestly!" she cried, which caused the police officers to chuckle as they walked to the door.

"Well, bye!" the first police officer called, opening the door. His partner prepared to follow through the door, but the first police officer slammed it in his face absentmindedlt before he could. Margo and Georgia could not help but smile as he collapsed on the floor. He looked over at them. "Don't you smile at me, niggers!" he ordered, and pulled the door open, himself, then went through it.

"Well!" Margo remarked in a tone that suggested she was merely annoyed. Karen's mouth hung open again, but Georgia merely frowned, not surprised in the slightest.

"You know, it is awfully terrifying," Margo told them. "What if the Klan decides to kidnap us?"

"I think I'll buy a gun," Karen said in a low and scared voice.

"That wouldn't have done Cathy no fucking good if they got her in her sleep," Georgia pointed out.

"Goddamn it, she couldn't have slept through her fucking window being broken open," Margo insisted.

"But the neighbors didn't hear no fucking screaming!" Georgia argued.

"How the hell do you know they didn't?" Margo inquired, placing her hands on her hips.

"If they had, they sure as hell would have called the police."

"Tell it to Sweeney," Georgia said, rolling her eyes.

"I've seen Cathy's neighbors," Margo told her. "She's got a negro man living next door, and he sure as hell woulda called the police."

"Maybe they did call the police, and they just didn't give a damn about it enough and fucking remember it when they were told of it again," Karen chimed in.

"Yes," Georgia admitted, placing her index finger on her chin thoughtfully.

"Either way, someone sure as hell must have heard the break-in, since the fucking window was smashed open," Margo pointed out.

"Yes. I suppose they would have," Georgia agreed.

"Which, of course, begs the question why the hell Cathy didn't hear it," Karen added.

"Well, she always was a heavy sleeper, Karen," Margo told her.

"Oh."

"Well, I think I reckon I best tell Deron and Mabel," Georgia said.

"Tell Earl. It'll make him more aware of the world he lives in," Margo suggested.

"Okay," Georgia said, and headed to Catherine's phone which stood nearby on a stand.

"Hell, I reckon you oughta call Tiana," Margo suggested.

"She don't know Cathy," Karen said, confused.

"No, but she might be interested to know about the Klan's activities," Margo told her.

"O-o-o-o-oh!"

"You're right, Margo," Georgia told her. "Operator, I'd like to place a long-distance call. To the Maldonian royal palace, please."

()()()()

The Queen of Maldonia, Tiana Hiregi I, had been awake for quite some time and had had 2 political discussions with royal advisers and otherwise important people in Maldonia's government. She had said little about her intended violation of Maldonia's constitutional law against women voting in any election. However it had come up a few times in political discussions, but it was always quickly brushed off by Naveen.

At present, she sat in the royal dining room attacking an Armour Star Ham which sat on a plate before her at the long brown table The Maldonian officials nearby who dined were not surprised, for she had been eating tremendous amounts of food for several days, and they knew it was because she was pregnant. While she dined in the royal dining room, the telephone rang in the bedroom. The King, Naveen Hiregi I, was not in the room at the time, so he could not answer it. It was, however, heard by a young maid with blonde hair outside the room who hastily threw open the door and answered it.

"Hello. I'd like to speak to your Queen."

A confused and nervous look spread over the maid's face as she began to regret her abrupt and thoughtless decision, and she said, 'I am sorry, but I do not speak English' in Maldonian.

"What the hell did you say?" the voice yelled.

The maid jumped back in fright. She did not know what the speaker had said, but she recognised that it was angry. She quickly screamed, 'I am sorry! Goodbye!' in Maldonian and ran off.

()()()()

Georgia turned to her friends, a somewhat confused expression on her face, although she realised what had happened. 'I'm afraid one of her servants who don't know English answered the telephone,' she told them.

"Oh," Margo said, and chuckled, a smile betraying her lips. One also betrayed Karen's lips, from which chuckling also protruded.

Georgia cleared her throat before yelling, "I would like to speak to someone who knows English, please!"

()()()()

The blonde-haired maid ran from the room in terror. As she exited, she was grabbed by the waist by the ancient, yet immensely strong maid, Mathura.

"A maid does not enter royal bedrooms unless permitted to do so by royal monarchs!" she screamed, saliva flying from her ancient and diseased lips into the 26-year old face of the maid.

"You need to learn your place!" she howled as she struck the maid harshly with her fist, then abruptly released her arms from the maid's waist, causing her to collapse onto the polished marble of the castle floor, sobbing relentlessly.

"I am sorry, Mathura!" the maid wailed.

"You should be!" Mathura replied and kicked the maid in the ribs before running off down the hallway, leaving the maid to sob. It was then that she heard Georgia's English screaming, which caused her to get up and run down the opposite side of the hallway that Mathura had run down, anxious to get away from the trouble she knew would continue to involve her if she remained in that position.

()()()()

"I would like to speak to someone who knows English, please!" Georgia kept screaming into the telephone before finally ceasing. She turned to her friends. "Well, I guess it ain't no use." She hung up the earpiece.

"I really think you oughta tell her, Georgia," Margo said.

"All right. I'll try again," Georgia said.

()()()()

The Lady Nagina happened to be passing through the hallway as the phone rang again. She entered the bedroom and picked up the earpiece of the phone.

"Damn it, Tiana, you better answer this phone!", Georgia's voice screamed into Nagina's ear. She leaped back, shocked by the intensity of the speaker's voice, then collected herself.

"Tiana is not here. I refer you to the Royal Secretary Office at 945-743-842."

"Well, who are you? Maybe I could just tell you..."

"The number is 945-743-842. Thank you." Nagina hung up the earpiece on the telephone, and exited the room.

()()()()

The Royal Secretaries' telephones had been ringing all day as they constantly did. Luckily they worked shifts and there were a great many of them. It was a man named Rugen's telephone who rang now. He had black hair and a handle-bar mustache resembling his name so much that everyone suspected he had changed his name upon creating his image. He answered his telephone.

"Hello. Royal Secretaries' Office," he said in Maldonian.

"Oh, hi! Can you take a message for Tiana, please?"

"Yes, ma'am. What is it?"

Georgia cleared her throat. "Tell Tiana that my friend, Cathy's house was broken into by the Klan and she was kidnapped and possibly murdered."

"What clan, ma'am?"

"The Ku Klux Klan."

"And who are you?"

"Georgia."

"Thank you, ma'am. Goodbye." Rugen hung up his telephone and hastily wrote down "Jorja's frend, Kathee's hows wus brokin into by the cucklux clan, and she was kidnapd and posibly murderd."

()()()()

Georgia hung up the earpiece of the phone, then turned to his friends as she sighed. 'Well, I got the Royal Secretary on the phone. Now, I say we should have tea.'

()()()()

The phone rang in Tiana and Naveen's bedroom once more. This time, as it rung, Naveen happened to be walking down the hallway, returning from an early lunch. He heard the phone ring, entered the bedroom, and picked up the earpiece.

"Hol ben be?" Naveen asked.

"Your Majesty, please report to the Royal Secretary office to retrieve a message for you."

Naveen assumed the message was for him, yet he wondered why Rugen spoke in English. "Yes, Rugen," he replied in English.

"Oh, Your Majesty! It is your wife who the message is for!" Rugen cried in Maldonian.

"Oh!" A grin spread across Naveen's face. "I shall collect the message right now!" he said in Maldonian, laughing. He hung up the earpiece and headed off down the hallway.

()()()()

As Naveen walked through the innumerable hallways and staircases that filled the royal palace he felt annoyed for none of the Royal Secretaries ever simply read a message to the King or Queen on the phone. It was not their personal fault. It was an old rule which he always brought up when any of his advisers or Cabinet members discussed new laws which might be repealed.

At last, he reached the Royal Secretaries office, then threw open the door and barged in at once. He cleared his throat loudly. "I wish a message from Rugen!" he bellowed.

"He is over there," an old Secretary informed him, pointing to Rugen who sat frenzied, the phone's earpiece at his ear.

"Rugen, I want..." Naveen started.

"Shh!" Rugen cried, turning to him for a brief moment before directing his attention back to his present call. "I would like your boyfriend to give your comb back to you, madam, but HE DOES NOT RESIDE AT THE ROYAL PALACE!" he informed the woman speaking to him, his voice raising as he completed his sentence. "Thank you!" He slammed the earpiece back into its holder, then sighed, and turned to Naveen for one moment before taking the message from the table and handing it to him. Naveen did not read it, merely exiting the room without another word.

He had just gotten back from dinner, so he knew that Tiana was still dining unless she had moved on, in which case, there would be probably be a number of people in the dining room who would have watched her exit, and perhaps she would have explained where she intended to go to the people dining with her.

Fortunately, however, she was still eating when Naveen reached the dining room. He had suspected it would be so, for she now ate near constantly due to her pregnancy.

He walked over to the table she dined at.

"Tiana, I have a message for you from the Royal Secretaries' office."

"Who the hell sent the message?" Tiana asked, never ceasing to devour her salmon soufflé.

"I do not know," Naveen replied.

"Well..." Tiana had a few more mouthfuls. "Give it to me after lunch."

"But..." Naveen grew irritated, and placed the message before Tiana on the table and left the cafeteria.

Tiana continued to eat for several minutes before finally ceasing. She picked up the message and began to read it before groaning. "Goddamn it, those Secretaries don't know how to write proper English."

She cleared her throat, then began to read the letter out loud so she could understand the words better. "Jorja's frend..." As soon as she had said "Jorja", she realized who the letter referred to. "Kathy's house was broken into by the cucklux..." She paused. until she got to "cucklux" and paused and read the word again, then read the next word. After doing so and reading it in context of the sentence, she gasped, then read the last words of the sentence, which caused her to gasp loudly and begin sobbing uncontrollably, her head face-down in the table..

"What is wrong, Your Majesty?" an Earl named Nigel, who was sitting next to her, asked.

"Oh, Nigel," she wheezed, glancing up. "A friend of a friend has been kidnapped and possibly murdered by the Ku Klux Klan."

Nigel gasped after hearing so, then leaped from his seat. "Outrageous!" he cried. "Your Majesty, we must declare war against this clan!"

"Don't be ridiculous, Nigel," Tiana said harshly, then fled from the room, holding her letter.

The other Earl, Clifford, who had been sitting next to Nigel, rolled his eyes as Nigel continued to stand up looking ferocious.

()()()()

Tiana ran into the royal bedroom and picked up the earpiece of the phone which hung on the wall. "Hello, Operator. I'd like to place a long-distance call to New Orleans. The number is..." Tiana waited for several minutes before Georgia's voice came through the telephone.

"Hello. Who is this?"

"This is Tia. Hello, Georgia. I just got your message, and I was wonderin'. How was your friend taken by the Klan?" She wondered if perhaps Georgia had been mistaken, but she feared her friend's answer.

"Well, we ain't sure she was, but we found the window broken open, and she was gone," Georgia explained.

"Well, maybe she went on some sort of trip, or she had to leave in the middle of the night for some reason."

"The fucking window was broken open, Tiana! The fucking window!"

"Well, there are a shitload of other ways it could have gotten broken, Georgia," Tiana pointed out, then added, "I just wanted you to know that maybe she ain't been kidnapped."

"Well, I guess not. I guess if she never comes back, we'll know."

"There could still have been a shitload of other things that happened to her, but not as likely as the Klan, I guess."

"Well, thank you. I know you don't want me to worry too much about getting kidnapped myself, and I hope that it ain't necessary to."

"So do I, Georgia!" Tiana assured her. "Which is why I ask this question. Was she real popular?"

"No, but she had a big 25th birthday party that went on for several hours. It definitely could have attracted attention from the Klan."

"Well, thank you, Georgia."

"Well, I'll ask you something now, Tia," Georgia told her. "Are you and the baby well? Or have you lost it?"

"Yes, we are, and no, I ain't," Tiana answered.

"Oh, good! And is your baby well?"

"Yes, he is."

"Well, then, goodbye, Tia."

"Bye." Tiana hung up the earpiece of the telephone. She then lay down on the bed and thought. She was not sure if Georgia's friend had been kidnapped or not, but still her heart beat at a faster pace than usual.

It was not long before Naveen entered the bedroom, a cigarette between his fingers. He grew fearful at the sight of his wife lying on the bed with her eyes wide staring off into the air, gasped, and ran to her side, kneeling down by the side of the bed. "Tiana! What is the matter?" he cried.

Tiana came out of her trance and looked over at Naveen. "Oh. Naveen. That message you gave me told me that a friend of a friend may have been kidnapped by the Klan."

Naveen gasped. "But they think she may have been kidnapped. So she must be missing. What were the exact circumstances behind her disappearance?"

"One of her friends came in and saw that the window had been broken open, and she was missing."

Naveen was both stunned and furious. "Honestly, why do the police not arrest that Klan?"

He took a drag of his cigarette as his wife spoke. "Well, their meetings are very secret, and besides that, the police in the South don't really give a damn about that shit."

Naveen was completely appalled. "Your country infuriates me, sometimes! They claim they believe in freedom for all, yet this sort of racism continues to go on more than 50 years after slavery was outlawed there!" He felt somewhat nervous to criticize his wife's country in this manner, but he was fairly certain his wife shared his sentiment.

"You're right," Tiana told him. "And it's actually been more than 60 years since slavery was outlawed."

Naveen shook his head and took another drag of his cigarette, sighing as he exhaled the smoke, adding a further quality to the sigh. There was a disgusted look on his face.

"She may not have been kidnapped, though. There sure as hell are a shitload of other reasons why she mighta been kidnapped."

"I suppose so," Naveen said, and sighed again, his sigh once more mingling with the exhalation of cigarette smoke. He then got up onto the bed, sitting beside his wife, who continued to lie on her back. He butted out his cigarette in the ashtray on the stand that stood by the bed.

"Anyway, I really hope that she ain't been kidnapped, 'cause if the Klan is willing to kill a random Negro, just think of how likely it is they would murder a Negro who happened to be the Queen of a foreign country during one of her visits to her hometown," Tiana said. This was what she had been concerned about, although she also feared for her Negro friends in New Orleans.

Naveen gasped. "You are right." He grabbed her hand and gazed imploringly into her eyes. "My love, you must not go back to New Orleans, I beg of you. It is too dangerous!"

Tiana's eyes widened, now as big as dinner plates. "I've been thinking about that myself, but still, we have two bodyguards, and we don't even know if she was really kidnapped."

"I suppose you are right," Naveen said, calming slightly. "And I suppose we shall know what happened if she returns to her home, won't we?" As he spoke, he took a pack of cigarettes from his pocket and removed one from the pack.

"Yes, we will," Tiana agreed.

"And if she does," Naveen said, grasping his wife's hand tightly, "You must not go back to New Orleans." He placed the cigarette in his mouth.

Tiana's face grew serious. "Naveen, I can't make that promise. I mean, I grew up in that town, and all my friends are there! I don't think I could never see it again!"

Naveen removed the cigarette from his mouth as he took a match from his pocket. "All right. You may go." He placed the cigarette between his lips once more, then struck the match on his thumbnail and held it to his cigarette.

"Thank you; but look." She looked Naveen in the eye. "I know you just want what's best for me," she told him. "But I will make my own decisions."

()()()()

The sun had risen over the bayou several hours ago, depriving it of its gloom and much of its frightening nature. Mama Odie had been awake for several hours performing various chores, and now she decided to go upstairs to awaken her visitor.

"Wake up, chile!" she laughed as she entered the bedroom. She pulled the blanket off of her visitor. "Rise an' shine, slepee 'ed!" she cried cheerfully.

Catherine still lay fast asleep, un-disturbed by the voodoo priestess's entrance.

Mama Odie laughed. "WAKE UP, CHILE!" she yelled, then shook Catherine. Still, she did not awaken.

Mama Odie grew concerned. She placed her old, filthy, wrinkled hand over Catherine's heart. She felt no beat.

Well, I guess it didn't truly have an episodic plot like I promised, now did it? I thought I would be featuring a different episode, but that one won't air yet. I hope you enjoyed, it anyway. (I know there are people reading this, even if you don't review, because I know 76 people visited Election Year in February, and it got 94 hits. I'm not quite sure what "hits means'). Well, anyway, I'd like all you people who read these stories to review, and tell me your thoughts on the story, please.)

It was quite different from my earlier stories, wasn't it? The opening was rather gothic, and it is overall more frightening than my earlier episodes. It may come as a shock to read this episode after my previous dull and boring episodes, in which nothing very interesting happened. They were more little pieces of dull and boring life, even though they featured a royal family. Election Year did feature some drama at the end, but still nothing exciting to this degree! This will be a shock, but you did see some of this story's nature in the final scene of New Year. The fourth episode will be similarly exciting.

Also, this is my first episode featuring Mama Odie. She's 198 now, and I promise I'll feature her more in coming episodes. She's just hard to come up with episodes for, since she doesn't really do much.

Come to think of it, it is rather episodic, and it has more happening in it than the other episodes. I assure you I shall get better as I continue to write. (Let us hope my readers get better at reviewing! 122 people visited New Year in January, and yet only one reviewed!)

(Copyright: March 2, 2011.)