Not the Twilight Zone

My very first one-shot. Sad... I've been on since before the Holes section, and I'm just writing my first one-shot now. I'm so lazy, and it's not funny anymore. Anyway, this was a school assignment, and I decided to drag the Newsies into it. It's kinda pathetic, I know, but I want to see if people besides my English teacher like my bizarre writing. I just changed it a little (Language and such).

Please excuse spelling errors. I don't have a spell checker. And I would get a BETA if I knew what one was. Please R+R. Harsh criticism IS accepted, but it needs to have a point. You can't just say it sux, because I want my writing to get better, not just to know it sucks. Okay? Okay.

2 second disclaimer: I OWN NOTHING! Except the people on the train. That is all.

A Word From the Voices:

Angel: We hope you like Nosilla's very first one-shot!
Devil: Yeah yeah yeah... just review.
Shades: Since Nosilla is a pathetic coward, she told me to say her other fic is on pause for now because she 'has writer's block' and is a lazy bum with stupid ideas.
Angel: Now Shades, that wasn't very nice. In fact, it was rather cynical.
Devil: Up your's!
Angel: GASP!
Shades and Tears: QQ burst out laughing QQ
Tears: She was just telling the truth.
Angel: But the way she said it was so cynical... it's not very becoming of a voice.
Shades: Just because Nosilla is reading To Kill A Mockingbird in school, doesn't mean you have to quote it every five seconds.
Angel: If you think it is bad for me to quote such a wonderful book, then you have another think comming!
QQ Long pause QQ
Devil, Shades, and Tears: BWAHAHAHAHAHAAA!
Devil: I have a point. You're an idiot.
Shades: You don't have to quote BOB either...
Devil: Bite me.
Tears: No thanks, you should ask um...
Devil: EWW! Not literally, bitch!
Angel: You really shouldn't call tears a dog, Devil.
Devil: You really shouldn't be a priss, Angel.
Angel: I'm not a priss.
Devil: Are too.
Angel: Am not.
Devil: Are too.
Angel: Am not.
Devil: Are too.
Angel: Am not.
Devil: Are too.
Angel: Am not.
Shades and Tears: QQ Get out the popcorn, sit on the couch, and watch QQ
Shades: Who needs TV when you have Angel and Devil?
Shades and Tears: QQ Laugh and watch the fight QQ


Not The Twilight Zone

Hello. You have just entered Not The Twilight Zone. Doo doo doo doo, doo doo doo doo, doo doo doo doo, doo doo doo doo. On tonight's show, we must visit the far past, roughly 100 years ago. Traveling in one train compartment were nine wealthy people.

"The horror!" A random sarcastic voice dares to interrupt.

Francis Sullivan, shut your goddamn mouth right now!

"It's Kelly, Jack Kelly."

Just shut up before I tell Spot you were with his girl last night.

"I wasn't with his goil!"

Well he doesn't know that. Oh yeah, what now tough guy? What now?

Anyway, nine wealthy people on a fancy train. One fell off and bumped his head. Eight wealthy people riding on a fancy train... I digress.

Okay, so nine wealthy people on a train, in the year 1900. Since that is a year after the Newsie strike, I invited them to the show. Only now do I realize what a titanic mistake that was. These stupid Newsies don't shut up. The show's about to start, so just sit back, relax, and enjoy Not The Twilight Zone. Doo doo doo doo, doo doo doo doo, doo doo doo doo, doo doo doo doo.

Maria and Eva were innocently playing with their puppy, Renaldo. Samuel was finishing up his paperwork. Chandra watched her little girls play with Renaldo. Margaret was pretending to read while really studying her companions, seeing if they were spies sent by them. Leave her alone; she has acute paranoia. Antonio was going over business deals in his head. The twins, Mark and Matt, were smirking evilly in the corner. In other words, everyone was doing their own thing when the train stopped.

Suddenly, the compartment went pitch black. Two long, loud, high-pitched screams filled the compartment. Everyone assumed Maria and Eva were the sources of the screams, until the lights flickered on. Mary and Matt were holding each other and screaming.

Hehehe... Like Spot and Jack. Hmm... I wonder if anyone ever wrote that slash...

"What? I would never-"

Put a cork in it, Frances!

"It's Jack! And I'm not a fairy!"

And you were with Spot's girl last night. Ah, blessed silence.

Anyway, after a long, loud, laugh, (ooo, alliteration!) the passengers began to realize that some of their belongings were missing. Missing items were items such as Samuel's watch, Margaret's purse, Chandra's necklace, Antonio's cigar box, and even Maria and Eva's puppy, Renaldo. The passengers took about two seconds to realize that Mark and Matt were both missing nothing.

"Dey stole Renaldo da puppy! What were da odds on dat?"

Not even you would bet on that Racetrack!

"Let's soak 'em foah da puppy!"

Sorry Jack, that job has already been taken.

Maria and Eva jumped Mark and Matt and beat them up to avenge their puppy, Renaldo.

Maria and Eva proceeded to tear apart the compartment. They even managed to open a high-security vault.

"Wow. Dose crazy lil dames..."

Shut it, Blink!

By that time, all the elder and conscience passengers assumed the missing items would be in there.

"Were dey?"

I'm getting to that, Mush!

But when they went to claim their belongings, they found nothing.

"Nothin'?"

Nothing. At this point, the only thing left unopened was Samuel's briefcase. Maria and Eva tore it open to reveal everyone's belongings.

"How did da puppy fit in dere?"

Shut it Jack o lantern!

The girls beat him up until a loud yelp came from one of his pockets. Eva thoroughly searched the pocket and found Renaldo. As Samuel swore revenge, the police burst in to arrest him for insurance fraud. Happily, the villagers- I mean the passengers- rejoiced. Swearing angrily, Samuel ran into the vault and disappeared forever.

Not The Twilight Zone is a legal, copy-written, and full of lawyers corporation; plagerize at your own risk.