The real party was yesterday. The real party had been fun. The real party had been as Robin with the Young Justice team and Batman.

This was not a party. This unparty is as boring as watching grass grow. This unparty is as Richard Grayson with a bunch of airhead socialites and stuck-up snobs.

As Dick finished saying hello to some girl who apparently went to his school and was rich. She also was wearing way too much eyeshadow. That was beside the point. Dick spotted Bruce in the crowd, desperately holding back a near grimace of pain. Nobody else would have noticed, but Dick could. He wasn't the younger half of the Dynamic Duo for nothing.

Bruce saw Dick coming and hurriedly broke off his conversation with a snooty elderly man and met Dick near the lunch table. "How are you doing, chum?"

Dick couldn't hold back a wince as he thought of the amount of bullies and jerks he had had to be nice to in the past half hour. "Awful, but I'll probably survive. How much longer is this?"

"Another hour."

"Jeez. I'd rather be trying to track down the escapees from Arkham. That's way more important than this stupid party."

"I know. But how would it look if the richest kid in Gotham didn't have a birthday party?"

Dick tilted his head thoughtfully. "Well, I could have been sick."

Bruce shook his head, just as Dick had expected. "No. We've already used that excuse a few too many times."

"Yeah. Oh well. At least the party's outdoors." Dick did not think he could handle doing this inside. That goodness for Alfred's foresight in having a picnic party.

Dick was jolted out of his thoughts by two dozen men armed with guns ran out of the trees and surrounded the party. While most of the partygoers obeyed the masked men's orders to kneel and put their hands behind their heads, Dick followed Bruce's example in backing slowly towards the manor. If they could just slip away and get into costume…

They stopped abruptly as cackling laughter rang out from behind them. Bruce and Dick turned around to see the Penguin pointing his umbrella at them. "And where do you think you're going, Brucie? And taking the guest of honor with you? Shame!"

Bruce stepped forward, placing himself protectively between Dick and the Penguin. "What do you want?"

The Penguin grinned, showing off his pointy teeth. "Oh, I want that pretty new diamond encrusted penguin you bought, Bruce! It'll look great in my collection! Besides, I need some payback after I was arrested at one of your events!"

Bruce remembered that. Penguin was so obsessed with social status that he couldn't skip out on an invitation to a Wayne event, even if he was on the run from the police. It had been a trap, and the GCPD had nabbed Penguin quickly and cleanly, all thanks to Bruce Wayne. After Batman had heard Penguin had escaped Arkham, he had a fake Penguin statue made as a trap. Unfortunately, the plan may have just backfired. "The statue isn't here."

Penguin leered at Bruce Wayne. "Don't you think I already know that? Of course, you're going to give it to me. If you don't… well… you'll be missing your own little bird."

A short cry sounded from behind Bruce that made his blood run cold. He turned around to see two thugs tying Dick's hands behind his back. "Stop! Let him go, I'll let you have have the statue! There's no need to hurt him!"

"On the contrary, Brucie, there's every reason. Boys, knock him out!" Penguin's men hit Dick on the back of the head hard enough for him to slump in the arms of the thugs while Bruce didn't dare move for fear of Dick being hurt further. "See you later, Bruce! Deliver that penguin to the Gotham Aviary, or else!"

-Cue YJ Theme Song-

Dick woke up with a throbbing headache. His vision blurred and swam for a minute before settling down so he could see his shoes and figure out what was wrong with him. Mild concussion, the Robin part of his mind supplied. He could still fight, but his head would be distracting. Still pretending to be unconscious, Dick snuck a peek at his surroundings.

He was tied to a wooden chair, his wrists bound separately to the arms. His legs were also tied to the chair legs. The chair seemed out of place among the surprisingly warm forest he seemed to be in, the bit of civilization contrasting with the loud chirping of birds. Wait… Birds… The Gotham Aviary. It was one of Penguin's favorite spots. Of course. Where else would Penguin take him on such short notice?

Penguin's nasally voice croaked above him. "Wake up, kid!" Dick didn't move. "Wake up! I need you awake!" Penguin got frustrated quickly. After a few minutes of yelling he seemed to blow his top. The distinct sound of metal unsheathing sounded and before Dick could react the retractable blade from Penguin's umbrella sliced across his left cheek.

Dick couldn't help the yip of pain that he uttered. He instinctively tried to touch the shallow cut, but was restrained by the ropes around his wrists. Once he had calmed down, Dick looked up at Penguin and gave him a piercing glare worthy of the Batman himself. The fop who called himself a villain actually flinched back. "What do you want?"

Penguin seemed to regain his usual cockiness. "Brucie will be showing up soon, and I need you to be on your best behavior. If you make a noise, I will shoot you. Cooperate and I may let you leave if Wayne pleads for your life."

For his troubles, Penguin got an eyeful of spit. "You're messed up!"

Penguin snarled and aimed his umbrella straight at Dick's head. "I'll teach you some manners, you little brat!"

Suddenly the ground started to shake. Dick got a sick feeling in the pit of his stomach as vines burst out of the ground and seized Penguin. A worryingly familiar female voice called out from behind him. "Now, Penguin, I need the boy. You've played villain a bit too long. I've got much bigger goals than a diamond penguin."

Dick's eyes widened in terror. "Poison Ivy!"

-Commercial Break!-

Batman dropped into the aviary cautiously. Before Penguin had come to the drop-off point he had lead Batman on a wild goose- or penguin- chase through Gotham, with Batman just missing the wannabe socialite and his captive each time. For some reason, Penguin didn't seem to be at the drop-off point. Well, until Batman spied an unconscious Penguin and a worryingly shattered wooden chair.

Resting on the broken wooden chair was a leaf. The odd thing about this leaf was that it was wriggling.

"Poison Ivy!"

A/N: YES! Young Justice Rules! Let's go! M'kay, so this fanfic was prewritten, so no long waits! Yaaay! Any who, standard rules, three reviews and I do shoutouts, yada yada. I just love stories where Robin's kidnapped in civvies! It's great!