I have no idea why I wrote this! I usually write cute Caskett stories, but listening to this song just made me think of this sad goodbye.
The song is "Leaving me now", by Level 42. It's a sad love song and I really love it, and I think it fits with this terrible moment our two favourite lovebirds are going through (sadly).
Please, let me know what you think!
It seems true love is so rare
seems all I've known is deceit
your laughter fills the air
once more I'm sensing defeat
Kate watched from afar while Castle had his 'goodbye party'. This time, it was not just a few months at the Hamptons, maybe some missed calls and he'll be back. She still ached when remembering those words.
"I'm sorry, fellas. But I'll stop coming after next Friday. It was a hard decision, but it had to be made. Alexis is going to college and she made me promise I wouldn't do anything stupid while she's away. And that, I suppose, includes being shot at. Besides, I think it's time for me to start thinking about a new character."
He looked deep inside her, his face showing sadness, disappointment. What had she done? She didn't know, and it seemed too late to ask now.
Now he was there, celebrating with everyone at the 12th, except her. He was laughing and making jokes with Ryan and Esposito. He didn't seem to miss her.
and I suppose you're leaving me now
I was so sure now I'm so full of doubt
and I suppose you'll be leaving this place
just like the smile you wiped from my face
this time
She sat at her desk, defeated. She couldn't go away, even though it seemed to be the smartest thing to do. She covered her face with her hands, hiding the tears that were coming from her eyes, taking deep breaths to uncover the sobbing and the ache in her heart. She then put her hand inside her shirt, touching the scar between her breasts, remembering that day. The metal through her heart, and his hands holding her. His words soothing her. Now, it was him and his words, his acts that were hurting her.
I always gave my best
your memory serves you so badly
some people kill for less
yet I'd still die for you gladly oh, so gladly
Between the jokes and the memories of all the silly things he had done while following the NYPD, Castle couldn't help seeing her with the corner of his eye. She didn't come to the party, and he felt it was better this way. He couldn't say good bye to her. But now, he looked and saw her sitting at her desk, crying. She was touching her scar, and he remembered that day. That dreadful day when he held her bleeding, a bullet through her chest, a moment that seemed to be the last with the woman he loved. Terrible, so awful. Ah, Kate, why did you lie?
but I suppose it's my turn now
to play a scene that's familiar somehow
I turn the page and you walk away
not even love could bring you to stay
this time
walk away
you don't need me
She raised her teary face and noticed he was looking at her. Their eyes met and for a moment, it was like it had always been. It was like they could talk through their eyes.
"are you okay?" his eyes said.
"no, I'm not" her screamed. "please come to me!"
But he didn't.
once more I'm learning
in the depths of my despair
your lies confirming
true love is so rare
She watched while he said goodbye, distributing hugs and kisses to everyone at the precinct. Then, he walked alone towards the elevator, followed only by her eyes.
"do something" he said, between his teeth.
"do something" she thought.
and I suppose it's my turn now
there's no more love only feelings of doubt
gone with the hope your words have erased
gone with the smile you wiped from my face
She got up, wiped the tears from her face, took a deep breath and went to the elevator. The door was closing on him when she stopped it with her hands. He could see her face was covered in tears, but her eyes were firm and serious. She entered the elevator and pressed the emergency stop button. The doors closed, and a clung proved the elevator wasn't going anywhere. They were trapped.
"So you're going?" she said, not looking at him.
"I'm going".
"and you'll kill Nikki?"
"I never said that"
"You killed Derrick when you were through with him"
"Ah, but I really didn't" he remembered. He actually had brought back Derrick Storm on an e-book.
"Doesn't matter. You're killing me".
He froze with those words.
love is a ship we all hope to steer
through troubled times cross an ocean of tears
a midnight sea that swells in your eyes
takes just one look to know I'm still mesmerized
"You know why I'm doing this, Kate"
"No, Rick. I really don't" and she turned around to face him. She tried her best not to cry in front of him, but it was hard. He looked frightened. Maybe it's time.
"You heard me, and you decided to ignore. If you really think that love is something to ignore, Kate, then maybe you don't deserve it."
She slapped him. She couldn't help herself. Why on Earth was he being this harsh? Who are you, and what did you do with my Castle?
but I suppose you're leaving me now
I was so sure now I'm so full of doubt
I turn the page and you walk away
Not even love could bring you to stay
this time
"I love you, you dumbass! You didn't even care to ask! You just… assumed!" She was so angry! She slapped him, she wanted to beat him, she could shoot him! She was also glad she kept her gun on her desk.
"Kate, I…"
"Just…Go!"
And she pressed the button to open the door, then the button to the hall floor, and stepped out of elevator before the door closed.
Leaving me now
leaving this place
I watch you walk away with an easy grace
