Hey look, I'm alive! So yeah, I know I've been gone for a while. I've been busy. But I just quit my job, so hopefully I'll have a bit more time soon. Of course, I quit because I'm going back to school in a month...but we'll see.

And once again, I haven't replied to everyone who's PMed me or reviewed...but I just had eye surgery two days ago. Give me a break. I'm going to try to get to it soon. ;)


Mairon is running.

Running wasn't the right word—that implied legs, and he wasn't wearing a fána at the moment. He is fleeing—that was better. He is fleeing, and the big-scary-thing is chasing him.

He doesn't quite remember why he is so scared of the big-scary-thing, but he knows that if he catches him, it will hurt. There were others—others like the big-scary-thing, others who had grabbed him and thrown him into this nothingness. Thrown him to the big-scary-thing.

And now he is running—fleeing—trying to escape. Though he doesn't know if there is anywhere he can run in this empty nothingness that will save him. He can't run forever, and when he falters, the big-scary-thing will catch him. He is more powerful than Mairon, though Mairon can't remember how he knows that.

But suddenly, Mairon finds the beginnings of something in the nothingness. Light—what is light?—begins to spill into the Void. He likes it better than the Nothing, so he follows it closer. It grows brighter—brighter? What did that mean?—almost to the point of pain. But it seems it does the same to big-scary-thing, and he finally stops, screaming in frustration and Mairon travels further into the Light than he can.

Mairon, for his part, is simply grateful that he can stop. He is tired, so tired, and couldn't have kept fleeing for much longer. He curls up, and once he is certain that big-scary-thing can follow no more, lets himself drift, something like sleep.

When he comes back, he is less tired, and more curious. What is this light, and what is it coming from? He cannot bring himself to come closer—the light is so bright it hurts—but he can look, and look he does. It is coming from halls, halls in the middle of the nothingness like an island—what is an island, and what does it have to do with a star?—in the midst of the sea. He does not like the sea. He can remember that—big and wet and cold and painful when he could no longer breath.

But there doesn't seem to be anyone in these halls, or at least not at the edges of them. Perhaps he can hear music coming from further in. Maybe that is what made the light. But regardless, it seemed that big-scary-thing could not endure the light, so Mairon would stay here. Surely whatever was in the halls could not be worse than big-scary-thing.

Mairon does not know how long he stays there, curled on the edge of the halls, not daring to go closer for fear of the light, not willing to go farther away for fear of what lurked in the darkness. But then, suddenly it seemed to him, someone else was there, sitting at the edge of the halls.

"Mairon," she calls softly. Mairon curls tighter. He doesn't know who she is, and desperately he hopes he doesn't need to run. If he does, he doesn't know where he could go. If he leaves the light, big-scary-thing will get him.

"Mairon, don't be afraid," she says gently. "Do you not remember me?" Mairon stares at her uncomprehending.

"I suppose not," she sighs, her brilliant green fëa darkening for a moment in dejection. "I am your sister, Indil. I love you very much, and I'm not going to hurt you."

Mairon is confused. *What…sister?* he hesitantly sends.

"What is a sister?" Indil asks, trying to translate. Mairon hums an agreement.

"Oh, that's a hard one," Indil mutters to herself. "A sister is family…someone who loves you, someone who knows you, all the good and the bad; someone who wants to protect you and care for you."

Mairon doesn't understand half of that, but decides he likes the tone of her voice. He doesn't think he'll have to run from her. She smiles sadly at him. He curls up a bit more comfortably, and listens to her as she talks. He doesn't understand most of it, but being with someone else he isn't scared of is pleasant.

It takes Indil a long time to convince Mairon to come closer. But they are not called the Timeless Halls for nothing, and she does not care so much in the end when he finally does come closer. Finally, Mairon creeps into the Halls to curl up next to her, and eventually even into her arms. He finds he likes that best of all. It makes him feel safe, and the pain diminishes somewhat, when he is with her.

But suddenly, things are different, and Someone is there. Mairon cries out in fear, for Someone is even more powerful than big-scary-thing—he cannot run. Indil is distressed, trying to sooth him, but Mairon cries out in fear again as Someone comes even closer. Then, worst of all, Someone leans down and takes him from Indil's arms. He cries again, this time in loss as much as fear.

"Shh, my son," Someone soothes him gently. "I know."

Mairon is cradled to Someone's chest now, and though terrified, he does not fight. He was taught long ago that he could not win.

"Ah, my son," Someone says again. "You have feared for so long…feared, and doubted my love. But thou hast not lost it, my child. I love thee still."

Mairon is relaxing slowly. This feels much like being in Indil's arms, but what he felt with her was even stronger now. It wars with the fear, well learned, of those stronger than he.

"Wouldst thou be healed, my son?" Someone asks gently, as Mairon hesitantly nuzzles into him. Mairon does not quite understand everything that Someone is asking, but if Someone could make the pain go away, he would like that very much, yes…

"Then be whole again, my child," Someone says with finality. "Be whole and who you were meant to be."

Mairon almost panics when power floods through him, but it repairs the gaping holes in his fëa, returns lost memory and thought, purges the tormented darkness from him. Finally, it is done, and he looks up.

"Atar," he whispers quietly. Ilúvatar smiles down at his small son; once lost, but now returned.

"I am here, my son," he says gently. "Thou art Home."


Well, I hope you enjoyed my 100th story, and please review!