Episode tag for Vital Signs (S1E10) because drugged!Neal is just yes-please with a cherry on top. And also because I like Neal and the possible thought of his identity issues. I don't own!
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Untitled
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This isn't a story he is used to telling. This is not a story he has told at all.
But right now, drugged out of his mind and without consent, Neal presumes he will have Peter's badge between them even without it's physically presence, or something to that effect.
"I'm not myself."
They are in the guestroom with Neal sitting too close, whispering, too loud, in Peter's half-embrace, the only thing supporting him from crumbling into a mess of limbs on the bed. He is a little sweaty, dazed and determined when he opens his mouth to tell Peter a broken mismatched story worthy of the books.
It reminds Peter of half-truths, white lies, and things that are made of stars.
And there are many things Peter knows to be real in this world, Neal is not one of those things. While Neal won't admit it when he is sitting docile at his desk, Peter knows. Peter knows a lot of things when it comes to Neal Caffrey and in all honesty, Peter would be genuinely shocked if Neal's real name is actually Caffrey.
(He might actually be a little insulted if there isn't another layer to peel away.)
So he refuses to be evenly mildly surprised when Neal finally tells him the truth, and calls it a make believe story in defence.
Still, Peter wonders whether he should put down his badge before he has to unhear all this or worst yet, cuff Neal to the bed. Except the conman is grinning up at his handler with something Peter refuses to swallow down as want or need, and still worst yet, trust and faith in spades.
"You know, Peter," he dips his head into the crook of Peter's neck, inhales deeply and continues, "the worst thing about art forgery is that you can't take credit for your own work."
"…I thought it was getting caught." Peter grumbles in reply but smoothes a hand over the nape of Neal's neck, letting go only when Neal lifts his head to watch him with those glassy blues.
"That too but this isn't Neal."
His CI tilts his head to the side and makes a small gesture at himself before he repeats.
"Neal is the best but." He stops himself short, pulls his bottom lip between his teeth in a small burst of frustration and twisted urgency and tries again, looking up like it is time to come clean to all his sins. "My name is—"
And because Peter hears what Neal isn't saying, he knows the implications as he makes them, that Neal Caffrey is his best work (the best forgery of an original he can't be sure even exists) and still, he can't ever put forth his own name.
Peter takes him by the mouth.
Like he has always wanted to but for a whole different reason and makes the decision that there are things he is better off clueless to.
There is no fineness when Peter pulls back, gives the conman a second to catch his breath before closing the distance between them once more. Overwhelming him in his confusion with a soft mutter of "I hope you don't remember this when you come back to yourself" against his lips.
And it is with a brute force that gives and gives before Neal blinks into oblivion and reciprocates, pushing up to slip his tongue into Peter's mouth, slow and languid. His hands are easy as he grips at Peter's shirt collar, fingertips feather light as he runs them over the jut of his collarbones. Inching up to his throat before settling at Peter's jaw, and just as limber and quick sober, Neal has him flat against the bed in one smooth slide across Peter's lap.
"Mmmm… you're a good kisser, Peter."
Perhaps it is the name, perhaps it is a million other things. Peter only catches that perfect state of drugged out bliss before Neal seems to come to himself, startled with his eyes in a panic before he tries to pull away, half formed excuse ready to take the blame away.
But some things aren't worth forgetting.
"Don't be an idiot, Caffrey."
With that, Peter pulls the man back on top of him and wounds an arm around his waist to prevent another escape. And he knows it isn't a good idea but he likes the hammering of Neal's heart against his chest, he likes to feel that Neal is okay, alive and in his arms, even if the man may be an untitled masterpiece in the making.
XXX Kuro
Call me lame but I have always wanted to title a fic Untitled (and now I did!)
