Hi guys, so this is my first fanfic and I'm hoping I did okay.
BTW does anyone else have trouble figuring out a title and summary? Cause mine SUCK!
This is just a drabble where it kind of follows Oliver's thoughts about Felicity. I'm thinking about writing this kind of thing again except they'll actually talk and that will give me a chance to be able to write a conversation between them.
Anyways I hope you like this and please let me know how I did, give me whatever criticisms you feel like and I'll take that on board to help me write my next one. Oh and little spoilers for 2x06.
Happy reading=)
DISCLAIMER: I do not own the show Arrow or the characters in it.
Oliver honestly does not get it.
There are a lot of things that come second nature to him, but this, her just leaves his mind baffled.
The simplicity of her words is not the confusing part; it's the way she says those words that renders him speechless most of the time.
She tells him things with such conviction it leaves no room, even for him to argue with her.
That's what he doesn't understand.
A quiet sigh passes through his lips as he glances up at the source of his confusion. She's sitting at her desk just outside of his office in her usual bright clothing. Her blond waves are falling over her shoulders and her glasses are perched on her nose as her eyes dart between the different screens on her desk.
That woman out there truly believes, not only in their cause, but she believes in him. She doesn't blink at her own words of confidence towards him.
She never hesitates to give him that boost he needs to carry on.
She most definitely never shy's away from putting him in his place either.
However, that's the real kicker. It's like she gives every ounce of confidence to him, which in turn, leaves nothing for her.
Oliver frowns slightly at the thought. No, put her in her element and she'll have you in the CIA's special operations database in no time.
No, her lack of confidence is more to do with the way she considers herself.
He tilts his head slightly as he watches her sit at her desk. Oliver has no idea about her background, her family, her upbringing, and he would never make the mistake of assuming that he knows her, but he can't help but to have observations.
Her posture is perfect as she sits at her desk; most office workers such as herself have terrible posture and are almost always hunched over their desk. Even her posture as she walks is perfect. She never looks at the ground as she walks and though she isn't the most co-ordinated person he knows, her steps are still full of purpose and direction.
That tells him that she is strong. It's a safe guess to say that with the combination of nervous babble and, dare he say, 'geeky air', that she was most likely bullied at school. He knows himself that pre-island, teenage Oliver would've targeted her relentlessly.
However, contrary to popular belief, she grew as a person from that experience instead of reliving those days by keeping grudges. She seems to have used them to create the strong woman he sees out there today.
She is a beautiful, strong and independent woman and yet she still manages to doubt herself outside of her element.
And that is exactly what Oliver can't understand.
It's obvious by the way she comments on the various women he has or had in his life that she does not approve and usually he wouldn't care. But after what she said to him, after Russia, it got to him.
"You deserve better"
That's what she said to him.
In such a way that he almost believe it too.
Oliver convinced himself afterwards that she wouldn't be saying that if she knew what he has done, especially during his five years of absence.
He suspects if she knew exactly what he had done, she wouldn't be here with him and Diggle, because she is just too good.
Too good for him in every sense of the word.
Her innocence, the way she cares too much about everyone else without so much as a thought to herself, the vast amount of empathy that seems to just come naturally to her.
Everything about her makes him question her crush on him.
He'd have to be blind and stupid not to notice the way she feels about him, even then he'd have to be brain dead if he were to say that he doesn't feel something for her.
But there is no way he'd act on it.
As much as he wants her, he knows he doesn't deserve her.
"You deserve better"
She is better.
She is the definition of what she said.
But Oliver couldn't do that to her. She deserves a man that will always be there for her, with no secrets or baggage that can affect her life and taint her light.
And deep down Oliver knows he can't provide that.
"Oliver!"
Her voice snaps him out of his thoughts as he's surprised to see her in his office looking at him questioningly.
He watches her standing there and can't help but to admire her beauty.
Oliver knows he's lucky as it's a rare combination to have someone who is as beautiful on the inside as they are on the outside like she is.
That's when it hit him.
If this woman can show him such unwavering confidence then he can do his best to reciprocate, not only the confidence he has in her, but to really show her how much he appreciates and needs her for exactly who she is.
"Yeah Felicity?"
"Oh you were kinda staring at me so I just assumed that you want me" Pause "Not that kind of want either, like the 'I want a coffee' not like 'I want sex'…not that I was thinking about sex, especially not while we're in the office…and I'm not saying 'we' as in 'us' either by the way, you know cause I'm out there and you're in here, 3…2, 1." He heard her clear her throat a little at the obvious embarrassment. "Can I get you anything Mr Queen."
Oliver could feel himself smiling at her usual babble. He watched her face slowly turn red and how she refused to make eye contact with him.
Oliver shrugged his shoulders and stood up to walk around his desk towards her. "No I'm fine thanks but now that you're here, I just want to say how much I appreciate all that you've done for me. I honestly don't know how I would've gone this far without you by my side every step of the way."
That got her to finally look up at him.
"Well you would probably be dead or if by some miracle you're not, then you're secret identity wouldn't be so secret."
She says it so matter of factly that he can't help but to smile as he put his hand on her shoulder. "True, but I guess what I'm trying to say is thank you, for everything and especially for you."
A moment passed between them as he held her gaze. He dropped his hand and watched as a small, shy smile graced her lips. "Thank you for noticing."
Oliver watched her as she turned to walk away, when her hand went for the handle he called out. "Oh and Felicity?"
She stopped and turned to face him. "Yeah?"
He smiled slightly and spoke with the same conviction she has for him. "You look beautiful today."
He watched a blush slowly work its way up her neck and to her cheeks as she mutters a small thank you before heading back to her desk.
Oliver does the same thing as he sits down feeling better. As for now he can't give Felicity what she wants but, he knows, without a shadow of a doubt, that he can give her as much as she deserves.
And for now, he's satisfied with that.
