Maya slumped against the backboard of her bed, her hand pushing her hair off of her forehead. Her face was caked in smeared mascara and tears and her glasses were thrown off to the side.
Things in her life had been rougher than usual as of late. The girl found it hard to fit in following all of what had happened between her and Zoe, and her relationship with Miles was suffering in the light of Zig being back in her life. She didn't understand why everything had to go wrong all at once. Being away from Zig throughout the summer had made it easier for her to forget all about him and move on, leaving the boy and all of the memories that he brought along in the past.
The previous year was a blur to her and by neglecting any thought of it, the girl tried desperately to keep it that way. Letting the memories in wasn't an option for her anymore. She'd finally gotten herself off of rock bottom and was at least stable in her thoughts and how she carried herself.
With one best friend gone and the other fraternizing with her enemy, Maya felt alone. As a punishment, Miles was constantly busy working in his dad's office on campaign matters, and with Katie away at college, the young girl couldn't help but spend her free time in the confines of her room, dwelling on the past against her will.
Her new class made Maya want to scream. Though she tried so adamantly to prove to Simpson that she could handle being back in regular classes, she still found herself in the room that was all too colorful, surrounded by people that new nothing about her yet had everything against her. She watched the clock to pass time until it was time to return to her room, where she would often stay for the remainder of the day.
Depression crept in slowly at first and then almost all at once. The young girl found herself neglecting her hygeine, separating herself from her friends, and doing poorly in all of her classes. But even after multiple threats from her teachers and even more comments from her old friends, Maya still felt like she was trapped. Trapped in a hole that she couldn't dig herself out of.
It was something that she'd never been able to understand before she herself was dealing with it firsthand. She'd heard the word a thousand times and had a close encounter with it previously, but the reality of the subject was something that she wasn't sure she was able to face. Cam had done it, so easily it seemed. He was gone, taken by the wind, and all Maya could take from it was that he was finally happy.
All she could think about was feeling no pain. She wanted the freedom, the release from all of the horrible realities of life, and it seemed as if she only had one option. The option was clear to her, and she even had it planned out, but as she set dates and times, the girl began to realize that it would be much more difficult than she'd anticipated.
Choking back a few sobs, Maya's small hand clutched an orange bottle, the label blurry to her un-aided eyes. It was easy to come by, given that her mother had a cabinet stocked with countless prescriptions that would easily do the trick for her. The quick rise and fall of her chest distracted the girl for a moment as she twisted the top off slowly, and several tears slid silently down the flushed skin on the girl's cheek.
Several white pills slid out into Maya's hand and the focused her eyes on them, her hand closing around the matter as if to hide them from herself. A simple urge to down the pills came over her, and before she knew what she was doing, they were on the back of her tongue, seconds away from being too far gone. A dry swallow sent them down almost painfully, and the girl let out a long breath. Those few weren't enough to do much, she knew that, and with that knowledge, Maya collected more. This time, a handful.
She heard a voice in her head, one that she couldn't quite place. "Maya, don't." it said calmly, sounding more prominent now and almost as if it were right next to her. Clamping her eyes closed, Maya pulled her knees into her chest. "Please... Maya," the voice came again, this time ringing bells in the girl's head. Her eyes flew open, unable to concentrate on what she was looking at. She scrambled to grab her glasses, dropping a few of the pills as she slid them over her ears.
Speaking wasn't an option for Maya as her eyes watched what was before her, more confused than she'd ever been in her life. The lack of sleep was catching up to her, that was the only explanation for what she was seeing. "You're not crazy," the voice uttered, as if it were in her head. "This.. this isn't real. You're not here," she said, her voice cracking on the last word.
The boy in front of her shook his head, his solemn face untouched by any lick of positivity. "You can see me, can't you?" he said, his familiar voice bringing Maya to squeeze her eyes shut time and time again as if to test the reality of what was happening. "No. No, Cam you.. You're dead, you left," she said, shaking her head confidently.
"Just because I'm dead doesn't mean I left you, Maya." Cam said, his eyes widening almost as if they were a reflection of his pain. "I'm always with you," he spoke up again, reaching out to take the bottle from the girl. Maya reached out to snatch it back, missing the plastic as it was pulled just out of her reach. "I can't let you do this," the boy said, his eyes searching hers for answers that he already knew. "It's not worth it.. the pain, the drama, it's not worth it." he repeated, shaking his head slowly.
"Sure, it all goes away. Everything goes away. Forever. Your family, your friends, everything you love. Gone, and you can never get it back." he said, knowing that her silence would remain unbroken. "And you just have to sit there and watch everyone move on. They all forget you until, act like nothing ever happened." he watched her carefully, unable to read her blank expression. "What if that's what I want?" the girl finally spoke up after seconds that passed too slowly for comfort.
"It's not. You want to be happy, you want love and to pursue your music, and go to college. You have to much to live for, Maya, don't throw it all away." The girl slid down against the back of the bed, her head resting against the hard wood as she kept her silence. "I've been here, Maya, you know that. You have to know that. I felt alone too, completely lost, even though I had everything I could have wanted. I walked out on you, I walked out on everyone. You can't do that to your family, Maya. Who will your parents have to live for if they don't have you? And Tristan, and... Tori. They would be devastated." he told her, reaching out to grab one of her hands, almost gasping at how cold it was.
"I... I don't want this life anymore," the girl barely muttered, her eyes drooping lazily. "You're gonna get old, Maya. High school doesn't last forever and when you finally get out, you're gonna make it big. Just... trust me, Maya. Don't be stupid like I was. Take advantage of what you have right now, because time isn't promised." he said, his eyebrows coming together as he continued to speak.
"Why did you leave, then?" Maya challenged, her voice rising. "If it's such a stupid thing to do, then why did you do it?" she pressed on, the excitement apparent in her voice despite how tired she looked. Cam clenched his jaw, his nostrils flaring slightly as he tried to think of a way to answer her question. "It took me making that mistake to realize how big of a mistake it was. I watch you every day and it only makes it more and more obvious. I was stupid, I didn't realize what I had and it's too late now. But it's not too late for you. You have all the time in the world, Maya, you have to listen to me. Please, just... go to sleep, try to rest." he pleaded, picking up the small pills that had landed next to her on the bed.
Sliding the pills into the container, the boy twisted it closed and slipped it into his pocket. "Cam, no, give them back." she tried, sitting up to reach for where he'd stored the bottle. "Sleep, Maya.. Just for tonight, please. For me?" he tried, carefully pushing her back so that she was laying on her bed. The resistance from the girl was apparent, but he insisted and moved up to sit closer to the head of the bed with her. "I love you Maya, please. Just... just go to sleep, tomorrow is a new day." he said, trying not to show his satisfaction in her eyes closing slightly. He could tell that she was trying to nod her head, her eyes weighing heavily under the effects of the medicine.
Standing from the bed slowly, Campbell pulled the blankets from the bottom of the bed up so that they laid lightly over the girl. Time was nonexistent as he stood over her, watching her breath pick up a regular tempo after countless moments. "I love you," he whispered, unsure if he even made a noise. His lips touched her forehead softly before he walked to the doorway, the pills still in his pocket. He paused for a moment, his face twisted in grief as he watched the girl that he'd left so hastily.
Before he would spend any more time watching her, Cam forced himself to leave, knowing that it would be impossible if he stayed any longer. But he watched over her, her peaceful breathing comforting him throughout time.
It wasn't long before Maya stirred, and her eyes shot open, darting around the room frantically in search of the images that she'd seen in her sleep. Her hands patted the surroundings, looking to find the plastic of the bottle that she'd put so much value into. And all at once it was as if the girl realized something, and stopped searching. She plopped back against the pillow behind her head, her eyes slowly coming to a close as she sighed. It all must have been a dream, she believed, a dream that had been so real.
In the silence that followed, the girl found peace in her dream, figuring that maybe Cam was right, at least in some respect. Her thoughts were clouded and she was unable to sort reality from her dreams. Rolling over in her sheets, Maya breathed heavily, nestling her head into her pillow as she fell back asleep, thankful that she'd at least been able to talk to Cam one last time.
