A/N: This one was loosely inspired by the prompt given to me for JilyChallenge Summer Tropes: I saw you staring and so decided to try to put on my suncream ~sensually~ but omg the lid just popped off and the whole bottle came out stOP grinning oMG

Rating is only due to swearing and implied sexual content.

Thank you to the people who read this, please let me know what you think! Don't forget you can find me on tumblr wotcherpotter.


Lily was typing furiously away at her computer on an article that had nothing to do with "How To Find The Perfect Nude Lipstick" and more to do with the latest bill the Conservative Party had presented that morning in Parliament. She knew it was a long shot for something like that to be published in the magazine she worked for, but it was what she was passionate about. And even though the perfect nude lipstick was an important part of life she was finding it quite a dull topic to write about.

Footsteps sounded behind her, and in a panic Lily closed out of the Google document she was working on, forgetting that she had a Facebook tab open as well and that would land her in equal amounts of trouble should her boss come up behind her. She should have known from the snuffles that accompanied the footsteps that it wasn't her boss, but her friend Alice coming back to sit at her own desk. Lily looked to her left and noted the puffiness of her Alice's eyes and the redness of her nose, and deduced she must have broken up with her boyfriend on her lunch break. Lily picked up the box of tissues on her desk and held them out towards Alice.

"Is it super obvious?" Alice asked her, self consciously.

Lily smiled sympathetically at her and Alice choked on a sob.

"God, I always seem to do everything wrong."

"Don't say that," Lily tried to console her.

"It's true! It's always the same story too. It starts off great; I mean, the first time I had sex with Frank, it was so amazing that I cried." Alice pulled several more tissues out of the box Lily held out to her and dabbed at her eyes. "And then it's like we hit the 10 day mark and it's over, and I have no idea why. I can never see it coming."

"You mean like, a single glistening tear, right?" Marlene, who sat to Lily's right, had joined the conversation.

"No, I was so emotional, I even told him I loved him," Alice admitted.

"After how many days?" Lily was almost afraid to ask.

"Five…" Alice answered, and Lily gave her a disbelieving look. "Okay two, I just really felt a connection!"

"Okay well… what did he say?" Lily pressed.

"He didn't have to say anything, I knew he felt the same way. But then he started acting all weird and he was so busy all the time, I never knew where he was. I tried calling him over and over but he never answered."

Lily shared a look with Marlene, which Alice caught as well.

"He didn't know it was me! I didn't leave a message and my number is on private."

"Right yeah, I bet he thought it was one of his friends. They always call each other 20 times and hang up," Marlene said with an eye roll.

"Anyway," Alice interjected. "I know why he dumped me; I'm too fat."

"You're not fat!" Lily and Marlene said in unison.


The next morning, Lily was sat in the conference room for the morning meeting. It wasn't exactly a conventional room; instead of a large table and chairs, there was an assortment of several lounges, a coffee table, and arm chairs. Lily was sat next to Marlene on one of the lounges, with Alice on Marlene's right. Their shoes were left at the door, and their editor, Rita, was sat in an arm chair cross legged.

"Morning team. Who wants to start us off?" Rita started, looking around the room.

Narcissa, a petite woman sat at the coffee table, started her pitch on "Botox for Beginners" whilst Lily and Marlene made faces at each other mocking her. Lily was in the middle of miming being shocked at the content of the story, when Rita called on Alice.

"Oh, uh, I haven't been feeling the best," Alice stuttered.

"She got dumped," Marlene explained as she wrapped her arm around Alice's shoulders.

A chorus of sympathies resounded around the room, but Lily noticed the cogs turning in Rita's head and didn't like the sense of uneasiness it gave her.

"Excellent opportunity for a story, Alice! You should write about it," Rita suggested.

Alice's face turned pale. "I can't write about my personal life for a story."

"Oh, I understand completely," Rita consoled her, and Alice perked up. Rita turned to face the rest of the room. "Who will write about Alice's personal life for a story?"

Several hands went up immediately, and Lily watched as Alice's face went from pale to slightly green. She wracked her brain for a way that she could fix this for Alice, divert Rita's attention or something.

"I'll do it," she heard herself say.

All eyes in the room turned to her, and Lily immediately regretted her decision to nominate herself for the task. Alice especially looked betrayed. She hadn't any idea how to work this into a story, unless -

"I could… I could erm, well, look at Alice - she's a beautiful and amazing woman. But, she has a problem staying in a relationship, which, most of our readers struggle with as well because they don't really know what they're doing wrong."

"Uh huh…" Rita nodded.

"So what I was thinking is I could, erm… Start by dating a guy, and then drive him away by using the classic mistakes most woman, like Alice, make. I would keep a diary and it would be a kind of… dating how to, but the opposite," Lily finished.

There was silence around the room, and Lily was regretting every decision she had ever made in her life that had lead her to that point, until -

"Genius! 'How to Lose a Guy in 10 Days' it's brilliant," Rita clapped her hands excitedly.

As she moved on Alice mouthed a thank you in Lily's direction and Lily shrugged her shoulders in confusion at both her and Marlene about what just happened.


Lily got out of the cab and ran across the street into the bar she was meeting Marlene and Alice, escaping from the rain. She found them at a table by the window and kissed their cheeks in greeting, a drink ready and waiting for her. It was warm inside the bar for which she was thankful, and she took off the jacket she was wearing and hung it over the back of her stool. As she took the first sip of her drink, Alice brought up the article.

"You are never going to pull this off," Alice said, shaking her head.

Lily faked mock offence. "Sure I can! Tonight, I'll a hook a guy; tomorrow I'll flick the switch and by the end of the week he'll be running for his life."

"You're not going to burn down his apartment or something, right?" Marlene queried.

Lily giggled into her drink and shook her head. "I'm sticking to everything we do wrong in relationships; clingy, needy-"

"Touchy-feely," Marlene interjected. "Oh, call him in the middle of the night and tell him you've been up planning your wedding, and would he prefer pink or blue accents?"

"What's wrong with that?" Alice asked innocently.

Lily and Marlene looked at her, praying to god she was joking.

"I'm joking!" Alice said, but there was something in her eyes that made Lily think it must have happened at least once.

They laughed together for the remainder of their first round, pointing out potential candidates for Lily to woo. When that their drinks were only ice, they journeyed together to the bar and abandoned their table in order to mingle. With her refill in hand, Lily journeyed off into the crowd to introduce herself to the men they spied on earlier. The first one she started speaking to turned out to be married and on a date with his wife, so that was a bust. The second had an issue with bad breath that she absolutely could not deal with for longer than five seconds, let alone for 10 days. She moved onto another, and another, and Lily was starting to doubt that she would be able to find anyone.

She sat down at the bar, in part due to her apparent failure but also because her feet had began to ache. Slightly dejected and not sure where Marlene and Alice had ended up, she sat stirring the remnants of her current drink around the glass with her straw.

"Hi," a voice sounded from her left.

She turned to find a tall man with dark hair and skin, peeking through squared glasses and smiling blindingly at her.

"Hi," she said coyly.

He didn't seem to be able to say anymore than that, and there was an awkward moment where they were just staring at each other.

"Lily Evans," she said, sticking her hand out for him to shake.

"James Potter," he said, taking her hand. "So."

"Attached?" Lily asked him, jumping straight to the chase.

He seemed surprised at how forward she was, but didn't seem put off.

"No," he answered.

"Me neither," Lily added.

James raised an eyebrow at her.

"What?" Lily couldn't help but ask.

"Just surprising is all. Are you hungry?"

Lily hadn't realised until right then that she was absolutely starving. Her stomach rumbled.

"You could say that," she said.

He was grinning at her again and he stuck his arm out for her to grab onto.

"One minute," Lily said.

She had just spotted Marlene and Alice again at the same table they were seated when she arrived.

"I'll be just outside," James said to her.

She watched him walk away for a minute, admiring the broadness of his shoulders before turning and scurrying back to her friends.

"I think I found one," Lily whispered. "He's walking out the door just now - don't make it obvious!"

But Lily was too late to stop them gawking at his retreating figure. He seemed to sense their eyes on him and he turned to see all three of them looking in his direction. He waved with a smirk on his face.

"Ooooh, Lily he is so cute," Alice enthused.

"Enough gawking before he gets a fat head," Lily said, and reluctantly they turned back to her. "I'll check this one out and see if he's a keeper."

"And if he is?" Alice asked.

"Then she flicks the switch." Marlene answered.

"Then I flick the switch." Lily confirmed, and she turned to leave.


Lily was seated across from James at a dingy fish and chip shop, a pile of empty prawn shells on the table between them. When they had arrived the staff had greeted him like he was a regular, and he had gone on to explain sheepishly that he lived around the corner and the venue was a favourite of his for a hangover. He had made her laugh majority of the time they were there, regaling her with stories of his time at university and the shenanigans they had gotten up to.

"What do you think?" James asked her.

"Of the food? Delicious. Of you… the jury's still out," Lily teased.

"Come on, Evans," James whined. "Anything I can do to help you decide?"

"Actually, you could answer some questions," Lily suggested.

James wiped his hands and face with a spare napkin, and sat up a little straighter in his chair.

"Ask away," he gestured.

"Well, what do you do?" Lily asked him.

"I'm in advertising. My main expertise is alcoholic beverages, but I'm trying to break into jewellery at the moment," James answered.

"So you're a professional schmoozer," Lily assessed, smiling at him wryly over her drink as she took a sip.

"Well you're a writer, I'm sure you know how to do the same." James reasoned, and Lily had to tip her drink at him for that. "Have I seen any of your work?"

"I work for Poise," Lily explained.

"Aren't they the fastest growing women's magazine in the country?" James asked.

Lily was bewildered at the random tidbit of information, but didn't press it.

"I'm impressed," he continued. "Saving the world one shopaholic at a time?"

Her hand went to her chest in mock offence, and he laughed at her dramatic reaction.

"Listen, Potter, I have a bachelor in Journalism; my boss loves me, and; if I play it her way for a bit then I get to write about whatever I want."

James pondered that for moment, before asking, "Like shoes?"

Lily shoved him playfully, though she laughed as she did it. He was laughing at her reaction, and Lily couldn't help but think there was something a little bit magical about the way he looked when he did it.

"No, like… Alcoholic beverages," she rebutted.

"Touche," he laughed, and clinked his drink with hers. "So; you think you got me all figured out then, Evans?"

"Just one last question," Lily started. James raised an eyebrow, but gestured at her to continue. "True or false: all's fair in love and war?"

There was a pause where James seemed to actually think about his answer though his enigmatic smile never left his face. It was such a shame that he was so charming, she thought to herself.

"True," he finally answered.

Lily smiled wickedly at him, and nodded her head in approval. "Great answer."

Lily downed the rest of her drink and stood to leave, James following suit. They walked together for a couple of blocks before reaching his apartment building and he invited her upstairs. The building was enormous and sleek, and looked extremely expensive to rent from. She had to wonder to herself if maybe she was in the wrong industry and should go into advertising. As she was marvelling at the extravagance of the interior, James lead her to his own apartment.

Lily wasn't sure what she had expected, but it definitely wasn't what she was looking at. It actually looked homely and lived in, rather than the coolness of a bachelor pad. Though there was no mistaking this was a bachelor pad, if only for the fact that a woman clearly did not live there. There was a small living area immediately to the left of the living room, home to a mustard loveseat and several randomly assorted arm chairs and complete with a large tv above a cosy fireplace; to the right was a small dining table with a couple of chairs; as she walked further into the apartment there was a large kitchen, possibly the most shocking area of the apartment, fit with state of the art appliances; beyond that was a hallway which she assumed housed a bedroom and a bathroom.

"Do you want a drink?" James's voice interrupted her thoughts.

"Sure," she answered with a smile. "Can I use your restroom?"

He pointed her down the hallway like she had guessed, and advised her to go through the bedroom and into the ensuite. She pulled her phone out of her handbag and scrolled through her contacts and called Alice. It barely rang before Alice was on the other end of the line.

"Big night?" Lily joked.

She heard Alice scoff at the other end but she could tell there was a smile on her face.

"What's happening?" Alice asked.

"I'm in his bathroom," Lily shared, snooping through his drawers.

"Lily Evans, are you going to have sex on the first date?" Alice accused. There was a pause, then, "You are! Lily you mynx!"

"I am not! I have a little thing called self restraint," Lily denied.

"Wow, that really hurts," Alice said back, and Lily didn't need to see her to know it was accompanied with an eye roll.

"I'm just going to dangle the bait -"

"Wait what's the bait?"

"I'm the bait."

"Oh right, I got you," Alice said dumbly.

"I've got to go, I'll talk to you tomorrow," Lily said hurriedly through giggles.

She hung up and feigned washing her hands. When she walked out of the bathroom, she found James sat on a cushioned ottoman on the wall opposite to his bed with a couple of beers in his hands. She chose to sit on the end of his bed, and patted the space beside her for him to join her. He grinned at her, but patted the space beside him on the ottoman. Lily paused; in the end she gave in, and moved to sit next to him. There was an awkward silence as they both sipped on their drinks and Lily struggled to determine her next move.

After an internal war, Lily decided to throw caution to the wind. She put her drink down on a shelf beside her, and turned to face James. She snaked her right hand up his side and when he turned to face her she leant in. Their lips connected and she immediately opened her mouth, encouraging him to do the same. She was pressed up against him, but for some reason he still seemed hesitant to push it further.

"This is… Lily… we should uh, slow down," James said between kisses.

"Right, yeah, you're completely right," Lily agreed.

She stood up and took a sip of her drink again, and sensed rather than saw that James had stood behind her. She turned around and his lips were on hers again in an instant. She smiled into the kiss, and she lead him backwards onto his own bed. She fell as gracefully as she could manage, and he followed her with finesse. She figured he must have done this a few times. His hands were wandering down her sides and one even found it's way under the hem of her shirt. That's where she decided to draw the line for the evening.

"James we should stop, it's too fast," Lily said, and she gently pushed him off.

He rolled onto the bed next to her breathing deeply as he did so.

"Right," he agreed, though his tone suggested otherwise.

Lily stood from the bed and fixed her ruffled appearance. He got the hint, and had the decency to walk her to the door.

"This was fun," Lily said with a smile and a wave, and without giving him a chance to respond she walked towards the elevator and left him in his doorway.


Lily was sat at her desk the next morning, finishing up her notes on the previous night's events to send through to Rita. She was surprisingly happy with the way the article was starting to turn out, and found herself excited to send through her notes.

"Lily! Delivery!" Marlene shouted from across the room.

Both Lily and Alice looked up at the sound. Lily's eyes bulged out of her head slightly at the sight before her. Several people were walking in with bouquets of roses and they just kept coming. Alice jumped up from her seat to dig through them all for the card.

"'A hundred times more beautiful than a hundred roses'," Alice read.

Lily rolled her eyes at the display.

"Does this mean he's hooked already? What did you do last night Lils?" Marlene teased.

"I knew it. I knew you were going to have sex!" Alice cried.

"He must have found the tickets to the Arsenal game in my purse," Lily deduced.

Sure enough, the phone at her desk rang and James was on the other end.

"Lily Evans," she answered.

"Evans!" came James's voice down the other end. "Did you get my delivery?"

"Just arrived actually, your timing is impeccable," Lily praised.

"I try my best. So listen, I found your purse when I woke up this morning."

"Right yeah, I completely forgot last night when I left," Lily feigned. "So I'm guessing you found the Arsenal tickets?"

"Well, you see Evans you have to know that I wasn't snooping," James explained.

"Right…"

"My mate, Peter, he's really clumsy and just knocked it right over and well… there they were."

"Uh-huh, sure," Lily said.

"Just out in the open," James pressed.

Lily sat back in her chair, completely at ease. She felt James's excitement through the receiver, but wasn't about to give in so easily.

"And there were two…"

Lily snorted.

"Come on Evans, as if you didn't do all that on purpose," James whined.

Lily let out a full blown cackle at that. "Fine, meet me at the East End entrance at 7 o'clock sharp."


Lily was a massive Arsenal fan thanks to her family, and had grown up watching the games on TV from her home in Sheffield. She hadn't had the chance to go to many games growing up, but now that she was living in London she took every chance she could get. She had a friend from university that was now a writer for the sport's section of The Daily Telegraph who always had amazing tickets that she shared with Lily. This was how Lily found herself only a couple of rows back from the ground centre of the field. Her throat was hoarse from yelling for the last 70 minutes, and she had almost forgotten that she was supposed to be ruining this date. Almost.

It was down to the final 10 minutes. The match had been tense the entire duration, and currently both teams had scored a single goal each. Arsenal currently had possession of the ball, and were heading towards their goal. There wasn't a single person in the stadium sitting in their seat, Lily was sure. Arsenal was in the penalty box about to kick for goal when the opposition tackled. The player milked it and writhed around on the ground until the referee called a penalty. Lily and James both cheered from their spot in the crowd, and it was then that Lily remembered.

"James, I'm really thirsty, can you go get me a drink?"

"What? Can't it wait?"

"But I'm really thirsty, please? Please Jamie-Wamie?" Lily pouted.

James huffed, but he moved down the row to the stairs and ran up to the food court. Lily took a moment to be pleased with herself, but was drawn right back into the game when they set up for the penalty shot. The team took their time setting up, trying to wind the clock down as much as possible. So much so, that Lily was worried she had timed her request wrong. But finally they kicked, and the ball soared through the air and right past the goalie's fingertips. Lily screamed with delight with everyone around her, and in her celebration saw James run out to the stairs just as the siren went off to signal the end of the game. She ran to meet him before the crowds began to herd out of the stadium like cattle.

"That was amazing! I can't believe you missed it," Lily enthused, rubbing salt into his wound.

He pushed the drink into her hand, and her eyes lit up. She took a long sip from the straw as they walked out of the stadium together.

"I can't believe it either," James grumbled.

When they were out they had eventually made it out of the stadium, Lily headed straight for the taxi rank.

"Thanks for coming tonight," Lily said.

"Thanks for inviting me," James said back.

Lily rolled her eyes. "I didn't really have a choice."

"No, you didn't," James grinned.

"Call me tomorrow," Lily said.

"Do I have a choice?" James teased.

"No, you don't," Lily said with a wink, and then she was in the safety of a backseat in a taxi speeding back to her own apartment.


It was the middle of the day and Lily still hadn't received a call from James. And the only reason she cared was because of this article, obviously. How was she supposed to make him ditch her if he wouldn't call her back? She had to take matters into her own hands. She picked up the receiver at her desk, and dialled the number she had googled for his office.

"Dumbledore Advertising, how can I help you?" said a voice on the other end of the phone.

"Hi, I'm looking for James Potter?" Lily asked.

"He's in a meeting, he won't be free until after two."

"Could you tell him it's Lily Evans? It's urgent," Lily pushed.

There was a rustle as the person on the other end put down the receiver, and then hold waited for a couple of minutes, hoping he would answer.

"Lily?" came James's voice.

"Hi, I hadn't heard from you yet, so I just thought I'd give you a ring," Lily explained.

"Er I've just been busy this morning…"

"Right, yeah, I was expecting your call was all and I was worried about my Jamie-Wamie."

"Listen, I'm kind of busy right now, but I we'll go to a movie tonight, yeah? Your pick."

"Great! I'll text you the details. I'll be thinking about you all day," Lily said, making herself gag as she hung up.

She saw Marlene sniggering into her hand next to her.

"Shut up."


Lily was sat next to James in the cinema of an old theatre complex that played chick flicks exclusively. They were about an hour into The Notebook, and Lily was making her way through a giant box of popcorn and crunching as loud as she possibly could whilst she did it.

"Don't you just love this movie?" Lily said, just louder than a whisper.

"Yeah, sure," James answered, clearly not paying much attention.

"So how was your day today? Were you super busy or was that just a lie to get me off your case?"

"What?" James asked, and this time he was actually looking at her.

"Just kidding, obviously you wouldn't do that," Lily said, smiling sweetly.

James looked at her for a moment in bewilderment, then turned back to the movie.

"So what kept you so -"

"Would you shut up," came a voice from behind them.

Lily turned and eyed up the aggressor; a large man, seated alone with a box of popcorn twice the size of her own. He looked on the verge of tears.

"Mind your business," Lily hissed back.

"I'm trying, but all I can hear is yous," the man shot back.

Lily threw a handful of popcorn at him.

"Mate, you need to reign in your missus or I'm going to -"

"You'll what?" Lily taunted.

Lily stood, and felt James stand next to her and guide her out of the cinema. The large man followed them.

"Hey mate, can we have a chat, yeah?" James asked him.

"James, he's quite large, be careful," Lily whispered.

"I'm not looking to get into a fight," James whispered back, and as he turned to face the man he collided with a fist.

"Oh my god!" Lily shrieked.

James fell to the floor and Lily did her best to catch him, but they were both laying on the floor of a dirty old cinema. James's head was resting on her chest, and Lily honestly felt so bad that he had gotten hurt. She was running her fingers through the curls at the nape of his neck, as if that would somehow soothe the pain.

"Are you okay?" she asked him.

He was mumbling something incoherently, his mouth was pressed into her stomach.

"What?"

"I said, I think I'll be great if I can stay here forever," he said with a grin.

Lily looked down to see his head was right in between her tits, and shoved him off her playfully and he started laughing.

"Come over for dinner tomorrow night to make it up to me," James suggested.

Lily pretended to mull it over as they helped each other up and walked out the door.

"Come on, Evans, I just got in a fight for your honour."

"Barely!" Lily teased. "What time?"

"Seven," James grinned.


Lily was riding up in the elevator to James's apartment with a large box in her hands. She was trying to step up her game, and had decided to bring over a couple of things to help her. In the box she had a comforter, some hand towels, a toilet cover, all pink and frilly; several stuffed animals; a large potted plant; and an assortment of menstruation products. She was hoping all of it would encourage the cracks to start appearing.

She stepped out of the elevator and knocked on the door to his apartment.

"Door's open!" She heard him call from the other side.

She let herself in, and saw that the reason he wasn't able to answer was is preoccupation in the kitchen.

"Dinner is about five minutes away, I hope you're hungry because I've made three courses," he told her.

"Great," was all she said.

She took the opportunity to lay her traps around the house. She left a couple of the stuffed toys on the lounge, and on the coffee table. She went to the bedroom and spread out the comforter on the end of the bed, complete with more stuffed toys. She moved from the bedroom into the bathroom, where she filled his drawers with tampons. She left a tube of vagisil and a toothbrush on the sink, and put a razor in the shower. She fitted the toilet cover and left a couple of stuffed toys on top just to be sure.

She walked back out into the lounge with the potted plant to find James was just serving up something that smelled absolutely delicious.

"Jamie-Wamie," she called, and she saw him cringe slightly at the name.

He turned from the oven to face her, and she thrust the potted plant in his face.

"This is a baby fig tree, just like our relationship. A helpless little fig tree, in need of some tender love and care. You'll take care of it, won't you?"

"Sure, of course," James agreed.

Lily cheered, kissed him on the cheek and placed the plant on the mantle above the fire. She sat down at the table, and he brought out the first course, a large plate of something that looked like it took hours to prepare.

As he put the plate down he said, "I'm just going to the bathroom, I'll be right back."

Lily had to hide her laughter in a cough, and nodded her head when he dashed off. She heard the yelling from where she sat and nearly choked on the water she was drinking. When he came back out his face looked slightly horrified.

"Is everything okay?" she asked.

He looked at her as if he had forgotten he wasn't alone and was jolted out of his thoughts. She could barely tell because of the darkness of his skin, but there was definitely a pink tinge there.

"Fine," he said, his voice cracking.

Lily smiled at him sweetly, and picked up one of the starters he brought out. She bit into it and was amazed at how good it tasted. She finishes the first and picks up another and another. James of course at a couple but it didn't take her long at all to polish off the entire plate.

"That was delicious," Lily enthused.

James was looking at her in disbelief.

"You still got room for the second course?"

Lily had the grace to feel slightly embarrassed at how quickly she had finished them all, but in her defence they were absolutely the best thing she had ever tasted and she hadn't eaten since lunch 6 hours ago so it really wasn't her fault. She wracked her brain for a way to turn this in her favour, when inspiration struck.

"Do you think I'm fat?" she whined.

She didn't think it was possible, but his eyes nearly bulged out of their head. He clambered out of his seat and over to hers.

"No, of course not, I just, I mean you ate them so fast," he tried to reason.

She started to fake cry - a skill she had perfected at a young age to win sympathy from her parents against her sister - and a fat tear rolled down her cheek. Through her sobbing she could see James from the corner of her eye, paralysed in fear and not sure what to do next. She stood then, and took herself to the bathroom to wash her face. When she exited, she found the table was cleared, and he had the television on and a couple of beers on the coffee table in front of him. He patted the space next to him, and she sat by his side with a small smile.

"Sorry," she said.

"It's my fault, for being an idiot. Here," he said, passing her one of the bottles.

Lily took a sip, and snuggled into his side. She could get used to this. Too bad it would be over in a week.

She decided the up the anti. She turned her head so that she was curled into his neck and nudged him with her nose. He barely even flinched. She started at his jawline, and peppered kisses down his neck. Her right hand snaked down the side of his body and played at the waistband of his jeans. She could sense the arousal in his body, and took her chance.

"Does Miss Daisy want to come out and play?" she whispered, fiddling with the button on his jeans.

"Does who want to what now?" James said with a jump.

"Miss Daisy?"

"Who is that?"

Lily pointed to his crotch.

"You called my - you can't just - it's not a girl!" He said, defensive.

Lily was trying her absolute hardest not to laugh.

"I just thought it was a nice name," she reasoned.

"If you're going to… To name my -"

"- Penis," she supplied.

"- My penis, then you can't just… It's got to be something manly like… Spike or Warrior or Hunter. Not Miss Daisy," James continued, cringing when he said what Lily had affectionately deemed it.

"Well I'm sorry, big manly man, why don't you relax and you can show me that it warrants a big manly name," Lily suggested.

He seemed to perk up at her suggestion, but as she suspected the embarrassment of Miss Daisy was still haunting him. He was completely traumatised.

"This doesn't usually - I mean, it's not normal," he explained.

"It's fine, Jamie-Wamie. I've got to be up early for work tomorrow anyway," Lily said.

She kissed him on the cheek and stood to leave.

"Don't forget to look after our love Ficus!" she said, shutting the door on her way out.


There were a surprising amount of people that worked in the same building as the office for James's company. Lily had to battle her way into the elevator, which wasn't easy when you were holding several shopping bags and a kitten carrier case. She had spent the morning brainstorming ideas with Marlene and Alice on how to step up the clingy-factor, and this was phase one.

When the elevator finally dinged to signal arriving at the 12th floor, she had to use her elbows to get past everyone and out the door. She came face to face with a receptionist, who she asked to point her in the direction of James's office. Lily thanked her for the directions, and walked down the main hallway and into a room on the right. She seemed to have stumbled into a meeting of some sort, as there were a few other people in the office with them. All heads turned to her when she walked in.

"Hi Jamie-Wamie!" she cooed.

She saw the sniggers masked behind the hands of the people she didn't recognise, and felt a bit of self satisfaction that her baby talk was having the desired effect.

"Lily," James said with surprise. "This is Remus and Peter," he explained, pointing to the two strangers.

Lily struggled to shake their hands with all the bags she was carrying.

"What are you doing here?"

"Another present!" she enthused, dropping the shopping bags on the ground and putting the kitten carrier case on the large table in the middle of the room.

"You didn't have to-"

"-Nonsense! Another symbol of our love," Lily cut him off. "This is Algernon."

She opened the carrier and a small, ratty-looking cat crawled out, complete with a tartan coat. Lily watched as James's face scrunched up in confusion.

"What's wrong with it?" he asked her.

"Don't you love him? I picked him up from the pound, they told me they found him on the street yesterday. He just needs a bath and he'll be all brand new," Lily explained.

She dug around in one of the shopping bags she had left on the ground and pulled out a matching tartan jumper for James, and tartan scarf for herself. She pushed the jumper into James's hands and urged him to put it on straight away, whilst she tied the scarf around her neck.

"Now we're a cute matching family!" Lily squealed. "Oh, that reminds me of something I have to do. I'll see you tonight. Lovely meeting you!" she said, kissing James on the cheek quickly and running back out the door she came in.


The sky was just starting to turn dark as she arrived at James's building, for the second time in two days. She knocked on the door to his apartment, another shopping bag in her arms. She couldn't wait to show him what she had created today, and hopefully it would drive him just that little bit further away. He seemed… not as close to breaking as she had expected him to be at this point. He opened the door after a minute, and seemed surprised to see her there. She walked past him and sat down at the dining table.

"I spent all day working on a photo album of our family," Lily said excitedly.

"Our… but we don't have a family?"

Lily gasped, and turned to look at him with as much hurt on her face as she could muster.

"You don't - you don't care about our family?"

"That's not what I said, Lily - yes, of course I want to see it," he said, sitting down next to her. "Come on, show me."

"No, you don't. I think I'll just go," Lily said, moving to stand.

James grabbed her wrist to stop her.

"Please show me?"

Lily huffed, and sat down again. She opened to the first page she had created (with the help of Marlene, who was a pro at Photoshop) to a photo of Lily and James on their wedding day. She watched James's reaction in her peripheral vision, and fought back a smile at the pained look on his face.

"This is what we'll look like at our wedding," Lily explained.

James said nothing.

"Do you like it?" she asked, turning to face him.

She watched him hastily rearrange his features into something more resembling a smile and nod. She turned to the next page which showed a picture of them with small children.

"Aren't our kids adorable?" Lily cooed.

James tried to cover a shriek with a cough.

"This is all of us on holiday in Paris, and here's the kids in Switzerland. Look at their cute little outfits!"

James was saved from having to form a rational response by the phone ringing. He ran the few steps it took him to get to where it sat on the kitchen bench.

"Hello? Hi Mum. Wait - What?" He held his hand over the receiver. "She wants to talk to you?"

Lily held her hand out for the phone.

"Hi, Eupemia! Yes, they worked great. Yeah I'll tell him. Brilliant! We'll talk later. Bye," Lily said, and hit the end call button.

"How do you know my mum?" James asked.

"Where do you think I got the baby photos from, silly?" Lily answered.


The sounds of the office were getting to Lily. Someone had been incessantly tapping their pen against the desk for the last two hours, and Lily was certain she was losing her mind. She couldn't stand it much longer, and the next person to slam the door to the break room shut was going to get it. It didn't help that all her attempts at trying to get this guy to ditch her weren't working. She was growing increasingly frustrated everyday. She was doing everything wrong, she was borderline crazy; either he was a saint or just as crazy as she was making herself out to be. She sighed and leant back in her chair.

"Struggling?" Marlene asked her, and offered her the box of maltesers she had open on her desk.

Lily grabbed a large handful and had the grace to look guilty at the amount.

"That's the last time I share my secret stash with you," Marlene grumbled, and Lily had to laugh.

"Poor Lily, can't get a guy to ditch her," Alice teased.

"Hey," Lily whined.

"Have you tried being clingy?" Alice suggested.

"I've been clingy, I've been needy, I've called him and left a million messages," Lily said, ticking things off on her fingers.

"Well, when are you seeing him next?" Marlene asked.

"Tomorrow night, he's got some game night with the boys tonight," Lily explained.

Alice and Marlene shared a look and shook their heads.

"They do it every week!" Lily protested.


And so it was that Lily found herself at James's apartment (again) that night. She had spoken to the super of the building and had had another key made so that she could let herself in. She had stopped by Tesco on the way and picked up a random assortment of foods that she had no intention of cooking but it looked good. When she walked into the apartment, he was seated around the small table with Peter and Remus whom she had met the previous morning, and a third person whom she recognised from the couple of photos he had placed around his apartment.

"Honey, I'm home!" she called, walked into the kitchen to start putting away the groceries.

"How - where did you get a key?" James asked.

"Never mind that. I brought groceries. Who wants some dip?"

There was an awkward pause, and then James's coughed and a chorus of yes's followed. Lily set to work chopping things up in the kitchen, banging around in the cupboards whilst James tried to talk to his friends. She gave up and walked over to the table just as they were dealing out the cards for their first round of poker. She stood behind Remus and decided to give him some advice.

"Ooooh, a Jack and a ten. Go for the flush," Lily said in a loud whisper, and the whole table heard her.

"Lily," James said, and it caught her attention to the plant behind him.

It was the potted ficus she had given him a couple of days ago, and it was already wilting. Excellent.

"James," she said icily. "Do you not care about our love?"

She pulled the plant from the mantle and thrust it in his face. He looked at her confused, so she elaborated.

"It's dying! Are you going to let our love die like this plant? Why do I even bother?" she huffed.

"Why do you - why do I bother? Where's the Lily form that first night? She was great and then you turned all psycho," he yelled back.

"Oh, so you think I'm crazy? Fine! I'll just take my crazy ass and our love plant home. Goodbye, James," she retorted.

Lily stomped out of the apartment, and as soon as she shut the door relief washed over her. It really was so exhausting trying to do everything wrong, or maybe it was living the double life. She took the elevator down to the ground floor of the building and was stepping out of the lobby when she heard a crash to her right. She ignored it, and walked to the curb to hail a cab.

"Lily!" she heard James yell, and she froze.

Why wasn't he done? She turned to face him and tapped her foot impatiently.

"Maybe we should go to couples therapy? Pete says he knows a great -"

"- No, I've got one. I'll give her a call and get an emergency appointment for tomorrow."

"Great. Well, erm, Goodnight then," James said.

He went back inside, and Lily was left standing on the sidewalk more confused than ever.


"So, why don't you start by telling me why you're here?"

Lily was struggling to keep a straight face. The therapist she called was actually Alice wearing a giant pair of glasses that made her look like she had bug eyes and a dark turtleneck and a trench coat. The overall vibe she gave off was a few sandwiches short of a picnic, which was perfect.

They were seated on a lounge in Alice's apartment, and Alice was sitting across from them in an arm chair with a notepad and pen. Lily looked at James, but it seemed he didn't have an answer and it was up to her.

"I just, I feel like - like he just doesn't even care about us," Lily began.

She could feel James twitching next to her, and she was amazed at his ability to hold his tongue.

"Uh-huh," Alice said, writing something on her notepad. "Could you elaborate?"

"Well, I gave him a plant, a potted ficus, and it was supposed to represent our relationship. And it only took two days - TWO DAYS - for him to let it die. I mean, what is he trying to say?"

"I see," Alice replied.

"And the other night," Lily continued, "I thought we could, you know -"

"- Have sex," Alice suggested.

"I was thinking more along the lines of love making," Lily added, "but anyway, he couldn't even get it up for me, he doesn't want to let me in."

"Couldn't get it up? Lily you called my dick 'Miss Daisy' you made it pretty hard," James finally spoke.

"Nothing was getting hard," Lily said with an eye roll.

"See that was a brilliant pun, that's the girl I met that night in the bar. What happened to her?"

"Oh you don't like who I am now that you got to know me a little, so you shut me out?" she accused.

"I haven't shut you out!"

"You almost had a heart attack when you found out I'd been talking to your mum," Lily reminded him.

"I don't care if you speak to her, you can speak to the whole family! We can go visit them this weekend," James suggested.

"Now, see there, that's a great idea James," Alice interjected.

Lily glared at Alice, careful to hide her face from James in case he saw.

"Don't you think that's a great idea, Lily?"

Lily was going to kill Alice later.


They took the train out to Bournemouth. Lily had never been to this part of the country, having come from the opposite direction, and so relied on James to lead the way. When they arrived at the main station, James hailed a cab for them and loaded their bags into the boot. Lily slid across the back seat to sit behind the driver, and watched out the window as they drove through the town. The drive from the station to the Potter family home wasn't long at all, and Lily felt like she had barely sat down when they pulled into a driveway.

There was a wraparound porch, and an elderly couple were sitting out the front on a porch swing, a cup of tea in each of their hands. James managed to look exactly like both of them, and Lily deduced that they were his parents. Mia, his mother whom she had spoken to over the phone, got up from the swing and came to greet them both with a kiss on the cheek and a warm hug.

"Lily, you look even more beautiful than you sounded over the phone," Euphemia complimented.

Lily blushed as she said, "You're too kind, Euphemia."

"Call me Mia, dear, Euphemia makes me sound ancient, and even though it may be true I hate to be reminded," she insisted.

Lily had to laugh at that. The man she figured was James's father introduced himself next.

"Fleamont," he introduced himself, "But call me Monty."

Lily stuck a hand out to shake but he dismissed it and pulled her into a warm hug. Lily felt guilty about the circumstances that led to her being there; they were so welcoming and warm, she felt like she could stay forever. They were both ushered inside, and James took their bags upstairs. Lily followed his parents through the house and out the back door to a deck. A familiar face greeted her there, as well as a couple of new ones. Sirius, the other friend Lily had met at the poker night, as well as a couple and what Lily guessed to be their daughter, were all sitting around a large table. Mia sat down next to Sirius, and Monty next to her. Lily was unsure where to go, but was saved by James stepping out the back door behind her.

"Lily, this is Andy, Teddy and their daughter Nympha-"

"Don't call me that!" the little girl said in frustration.

Lily hid a smile behind her hand and the girl came up to her and introduced herself.

"I'm Dora," she said.

Lily knelt to shake her hand, she couldn't have been more than six years old. Dora ran back to her own chair, and Lily followed to greet her parents.

"Hi, I'm Andy, I'm Sirius's cousin and this is my husband, Teddy," Andy explained.

James sat down on Sirius's other side, and Lily sat next to him on his other side.

"Hello Evans," Sirius said as she walked behind his chair. "Hope you're better at bullshit than you are at poker."

Lily looked to James for an explanation, and all he gave her was a grin. He dealt her and the rest of the table a couple of cards, and gave her a quick run down of the game. The rules were simple enough; the aim of the game was to get rid of your cards by one of two ways. You select cards and put them down on a pile in the middle of the table. You could either say they were completely different cards and hope people don't call your bluff, or say the exact cards they were and hope someone does. If the person who calls it is wrong, they are to pick up all the cards in the pile.

Even after James's explanation, Lily was still a bit lost about how to play the game. People were yelling bullshit too often for her to figure out on the job, and so everyone else ended up giving her secret signals to help. It turned out James was the longest running winner of the game, and everyone was determined to see his winning streak end. Lily won several rounds against him, and James seemed to be oblivious. It was only when Lily was looking too conspicuously at Andy across the table, that James caught on.

"So what, you just all wanted to see me lose?" he accused.

"Yeah mate, basically," Sirius explained, and a chorus of laughter followed.

They packed up the cards, and everyone fell into their own conversations.

"You've already turned my family against me, Evans," James complained.

"I'm too charming for my own good, I know," Lily joked.

James shook his head, and leaned in to kiss her temple. The warmth that spread from that point throughout her body gave Lily butterflies, and she wasn't expecting that reaction. She was in trouble.


They hadn't shared a bed together yet because of all the (purposely) failed attempts at sex, but the next morning Lily woke up from one of the best sleeps she had ever had and it was next to James. The sun was peaking through the blinds and lit up the room just enough so that she could see James's sleeping face. His arm was wrapped around her side and so she tried to move as little as possible, but he must have sensed her awareness because he stirred. He cracked an eye open, then the other, and seemed to do a double take that Lily was in his bed. Lily smiled goofily at him, and started to laugh when he reached for his glasses on the nightstand beside him.

"Morning," he croaked, his voice hoarse from sleep.

"Morning," Lily responded with a smile.

There was something about seeing a person as they had just woken up, in their most vulnerable state, that could make you really fall in love with a person. She didn't mean to keep waxing poetic about it (even she was beginning to throw up at her own words) but she really had gotten herself into such a huge mess with this article and this man in bed beside her. She sighed with content and snuggled in closer to him, trying to prolong the moment a little longer. He kissed her temple and that warm feeling from yesterday spread throughout her body again.

"Hungry?" James asked.

And because she was cliche at heart, she responded with, "You could say that."

Reluctantly, she followed him downstairs to the kitchen. She hadn't realised how early it was, but it no one else in the house was awake yet. James quietly set to work preparing all the fixings for a full English breakfast, and Lily stood there dumbly, in the middle of the kitchen. She offered to help but advised him to think carefully as she was, in fact, a terrible cook. He laughed at her, and there were crinkles around his eyes and Lily felt like she might melt there and then. He insisted she sit at one of the bar stools while he cooked anyway, and she was grateful for the excuse to sit down.

It didn't take him long to prepare, and they were eating within minutes out on the back deck. The sun had started to rise properly by then, and Lily basked in the warmth of it on her skin.

"So, what's there to do around Bournemouth, then?" she asked.

He seemed to think about it for a minute, before he suggested, "We could just lay by the beach. You're in need of a bit of a tan."

Lily threw a piece of her bacon at him for that, and amazingly, he caught it in his mouth. Lily shook her head at him in amazement, and finished the rest of her breakfast in silence lost in her own thoughts. After polishing off her plate, she took her own and James's empty plates to the sink to wash, before following him upstairs to get changed for the day.

The best part about the Potter's house was that it was right on the beach, and so all they had to do was get changed and walk out the back door. The spread towels out on the sand, and Lily (as it was pointed out by James earlier that she was indeed quite pale) pulled out the sunscreen from her bag and set to work applying liberally. James had run ducked back inside to grab them a couple bottles of water and on his return Lily managed to squeeze half the sunscreen tube out of the bottle and onto her lap. She didn't think James would ever stop laughing.

The day passed in a dreamy haze, and by mid morning majority of the household had joined them on the sand. Dora insisted that just sitting on the beach was too boring for them all, and they had to play a game. Sirius brought out a football from inside and they set up a makeshift field using their shoes as markers. Lily, James and Andy on one team, and Sirius, Teddy and Dora were on the other. Lily was absolutely terrible at the game, but so was Andy, and they laughed so hard Lily had tears in her eyes at one of her attempts to kick the ball. James was actually a decent player, and so what if she drooled a little bit at how good he looked with his shirt off in the sun? It wasn't a crime.

The game came to an end with Sirius, Teddy and Dora scoring 2 goals to Lily, James and Andy's 1. Whilst the rest of them walked back up to the house for a late lunch, James took Lily's hand and led her to a small ice cream shop around the corner. They each got a scoop and stepped outside again to eat at one of the small tables. They didn't even get one taste before a a van came hurtling around the corner and drove through a dirty puddle, dousing them both in muddy water. Lily laughed so hard on the look on James's face she was sure she felt abs growing.

He led her back to the house, and after a quick explanation to the family they went upstairs to the bathroom. James turned on the shower and pointed out where the towels were. He was in the middle of explaining the trick with the taps, when Lily decided to throw all caution to the wind. She undid the straps of her swimsuit and let it fall to the ground. He was stared at her wide eyed for a moment, before he kicked into gear and threw his glasses on the sink.


After the shower they said their goodbyes, and headed back home to London. Lily spent the entire train ride asleep on James's shoulder, worn out from the day's activities. Arriving back in London felt like the ending to a perfect dream, and she was being thrown back into reality. She really wasn't sure if she could finish writing this article. She wanted to stay curled up in James's arms for the rest of her life.

They arrived back in London and were about to go their separate ways to their own apartments. James grabbed her wrist to stop her.

"Lily, my boss is throwing this ball for the Jewellery account I was telling you about and I'd really love it if you'd come with me," he said. "As my girlfriend," he added.

Lily thought it over. "Tomorrow is the tenth day that we've been dating?"

"I guess so… I haven't really been keeping track of days if I'm honest."

"I guess we'll see how the ball goes, and then we'll find out if I'm your girlfriend."

James rolled his eyes, but there was a smile on his face.

"I'll pick you up at seven."


It was halfway through the day and Lily had been working up the nerve all day to tell Rita that she couldn't finish this article. She had woken up that morning feeling a mix of emotions; part sick with guilt over what she had done; another part excited at the thought of seeing James again that night; and a third part worrying about how to break the news to James about how this had all started so she could explain to him that she wasn't actually batshit crazy, but also about how to explain to her boss that she wasn't going to have the article for her.

She had shared the news of the weekend's events with Marlene and Alice as soon as she had walked into the office that morning, and it had been a rollercoaster of emotions. They had little in the way of suggestions on how to approach it with Rita, and she had tried to distract herself with finding new friends.

At half past 12, Rita came back to her office from a meeting looking rather pleased, and Lily seized the moment that she was in a good mood. She walked over and knocked on the door to her office.

"Lily, how's the story coming along?" Rita asked her.

"Actually, that's what I wanted to come talk to you about," Lily started.

Rita looked up from what she was reading and scrutinised Lily over her glasses. Lily gulped and continued.

"I just don't think I can really finish this article. I've gotten to know this guy and he's so sweet, and I just don't feel right about it…" Lily trailed off.

Rita took her glasses off and stared Lily down.

"Do I look like your best friend?" she asked.

"Er, no," Lily answered.

"Exactly, because I'm your boss. I'm not here to 'Doctor Phil' this out with you Lily. I need this article by this time tomorrow, and that's final."

Rita put her glasses on and went back to reading whatever it was before Lily had walked in. Lily took that as a dismissal and walked back to her desk, where Alice and Marlene were waiting. They saw the look on her face and didn't ask any questions about how it went. Marlene offered her maltesers again and Lily took the whole box.


Lily was tapping her foot impatiently in the lobby of her apartment building, waiting for James to arrive. She had never really noticed it before but the lobby of her building was in dire need of somewhere to sit, and the only reason she noticed it now was because the shoes she was wearing were killing her feet. They were gorgeous and totally worth it, but that didn't make them hurt her feet any less.

After what felt like forever, she saw a taxi pull up out the front and James climb out of the backseat. Her heart leapt into her throat when she saw him dressed in his suit and bowtie, and she had serious thoughts about ditching this whole thing and dragging him upstairs to her apartment. She watched him walk through the doors of the building and saw his face when he found her.

"Holy shit," she thought he mumbled.

Lily felt a pink tinge on her cheeks as she walked towards him. He was grinning at her, and motioned for her to twirl as she walked over. She obliged, although she lost her footing slightly and fell into James's arms as he caught her. The pink on her cheeks flared into a full blown red. His smile showed he was trying not to laugh, and she was grateful for it. He held his arm out for her to grab onto and together they they got into the taxi.

The drive didn't take long at all, and before long they arrived at the hall where the ball was taking place. James helped her out of the car and held his arm out again to help her walk up the stairs into the venue as well. Lily was amazed at the set up inside the hall; there were hundreds of people, waiters walking around with champagne, a stage with a full band, everyone dressed to the nines. As she marvelled, James procured a couple of glasses of champagne and offered one to her.

"I don't want to bore you with work talk, but I'm just going to check in with the boss. Our table is towards the stage," James told her.

She nodded in agreement and went in search of the table. It was easy enough to find their seats, and she was admiring the place cards when there was a cough behind her.

"You're Lily Evans, I assume? James's date?"

Lily turned to find a tall man with a long white beard appraising her over half moon spectacles. He stuck his hand out to shake.

"Albus Dumbledore," he introduced himself.

"Oh, you're James's boss," Lily remembered, and shook his hand enthusiastically.

He didn't say anything for a moment, and Lily found her gaze wandering until she found James in the crowd again. He was talking to a group of people and had just made them all laugh. Lily felt herself smiling involuntarily at him.

"You love him," Dumbledore said.

It was a statement, not a question. He was smiling at her over his glasses and Lily felt sick.

"I don't know if I'd say it so strongly," Lily tried to divert.

"I would," he said, and he turned to leave.

"Please don't tell him!" Lily said after him.

A waiter walked by with a tray of champagne flutes and she grabbed two, down the first immediately and slammed it back on the tray, then sat down with the second. She tried to take her mind off of what just happened by paying attention to the band on the stage in front of her. She was interrupted by more of James's colleagues; this time, Peter and Remus.

"Lily, hey," Remus started.

They sat down in chairs either side of her.

"We just wanted to thank you for being so cool about all this," Peter said.

Lily looked between them in bewilderment.

"When James made that bet about making a woman fall in love with him I really didn't think he was going to pull it off," Remus continued.

Lily's heart fell into her stomach.

"He's pretty smart sometimes, I'll give it to him. Getting you to play along like that was bloody brilliant," Peter said in awe.

"No problem," Lily said through a pained smile.

She stood from her seat, although she wasn't sure where she was going. She downed the rest of the champagne in her glass and sought out for another waiter for another glass. Albus was on stage calling everyone's attention and asking them to sit. He welcomed a musician on stage that Lily had never heard of, and as they began to play Lily was hit with a stroke of brilliance. She found a microphone to the side of the stage and stepped onto the stage.

"Helloooooo, everybody. Most of you probably, have no idea who I am, or who James Potter is, and to that I have one thing to say: shame on you!" she began.

She spotted James in the crowd, and he managed to look both alarmed and furious at the same time. This only spurred her on.

"He is a brilliant advertising executive, a rabid football fan and a little known secret ladies, a brilliant chef. But, and maybe this is the most impressive, he is an amazing singer," Lily paused to finish the final sip of her champagne.

"And I've heard, that he has prepared a song for you all tonight as a special treat. Let's give it up for James!"

Lily began to clap and the crowd slowly joined in. Lily could see many confused faces in the crowd, and she was very thankful for the level of alcohol in her system right now. James was walking up to the stage, and Lily tried to make a quick escape. She dropped the microphone on a nearby table and crept offstage, but James wasn't having a bar of it.

"Lily, thank so you much. But don't you think I'm letting you run away from getting your moment too. Pete, Remus, could you help me out?"

Lily almost had a clean getaway, but Peter and Remus kicked into gear just in time to bar her from reaching the door. Lily started to seethe with anger.

"See the real show tonight," James continued from the stage, "is that she and I will be singing a duet."

The crowd began their applause again, and Lily was herded back onstage against her will by Peter and Remus. Another microphone was shoved into her hand, and she wished longingly for it to somehow turn into a champagne flute. She heard James asking the band on stage to start playing something but didn't quite catch the title. It wasn't until they started playing that she realised they were playing Justin Bieber's Love Yourself.

James started singing the first verse terribly, and Lily stared at him trying to mask her anger now that she was on stage again. She let him embarrass himself for a bit longer before joining in on the chorus and adlibbing her own lyrics.

"If you like the way you look so much, then James Potter, you should go and fuck yourself," she yelled into the microphone.

She knew she was terrible, but at this point she didn't have room in her brain to care about that.

"Oooooooh Lily Evans, if you think that I'm still holding on, you should go and fuck yourself," James replied.

"You know, you fooled me to win a stupid bet at work and you should be ashamed," Lily said.

"You took me to that football match and made me miss the best part of the game!" James said back.

"Oooooooh, everybody look he's a rhymer! Well, maybe I should tell the room that your sex is laaaaame."

"You - you - you named my penissss after a dame," James slurred.

"I really think you need to get over that it really wasn't that big of a deal," Lily said.

James continued to sing the song into her face, and Lily didn't want to deal with it anymore. She dumped the microphone on the table she left it before. She stormed between the tables and chairs of the crowd and thankfully this time wasn't stopped. When she walked out the doors and onto the street relief washed over her. The cool of the night air sobered her a little, and she couldn't believe she had actually been on stage and said all of those things.

Her relief was short lived though, because she heard the doors open again behind her and James stomped through them.

"No way, Lily, You do not get to run away from me now," he called.

"Me? You used me to get ahead at work! You played me like a violin," Lily said back.

"You drove me insane, Lily - INSANE - for stupid magazine article."

"Stupid maga - you arrogant, selfish arse, James Potter. You told people you could make anyone fall in love with you, and I was your proof," Lily wiped an angry tear from her cheek.

"And I was just your test subject, trying out all your theories," James yelled back. "I bet this is a nice little twist, you can use it in your story."

"That's a great idea, maybe we should make a bet," Lily suggested.

Her words suggested she was being sarcastic, but her tone was holding back tears.

"You wanted to lose a guy in 10 days, well here you go. You did it."

James walked away, back inside the building. Lily was left standing outside in the cold that had brought her so much relief earlier, and now only left her feeling vulnerable and raw.


It was raining when Lily woke up the next morning. How fucking cliche, she thought to herself.

She had gone home the night before and completely restarted her article. She stayed up until the early morning until she completed it, and when her alarm went off she had only gotten a couple of hours sleep. She rocked up to work looking like a hot mess, and Alice pushed a coffee into her hands as soon as she sat down at her desk. Lily pondered if she could get away with keeping her sunglasses on all day as her computer turned on.

"Lily, in my office in five," Rita said on her way past.

Lily sighed, and hurriedly printed off the article she had finished last night. She walked into Rita's office with her article and sat on a high-backed arm chair in the middle of the room. Rita stuck out her hand for the article and Lily handed it over and watched as she read. She wasn't really sure how Rita would take the article, it was completely different to the one she had been sending notes on throughout the week. But she was proud of what she had written regardless.

After what seemed like an eon, Rita finished the article and looked up from the page.

"It's not exactly what I was expecting," she began. "But I love it!"

A wave of relief passed through Lily, and she let out a breath that she hadn't realised she was holding in.

"Feel free to write about anything you want from now on," Rita added.

"Oh my God… Anything?"

"Wherever the wind takes you," Rita said with a smile.

"So even politics?" Lily pushed.

"Well, it won't take you there."

"What about religion, poverty…" Lily trailed off.

"When I say wind, I mean more of a light breeze."

"Well what can I write about?" Lily complained.

"Like I said, Lily: wherever the wind takes you. Whatever your heart desires. Shoes, dressing for your body type, accessories, et cetera."

Rita was no longer looking at Lily, but at her computer screen. She didn't notice when Lily got up from her chair, and she didn't see the look on her face when she had made her decision.

"Thank you, Rita, for the opportunity," she said with a smile. "And thank you for making it so easy to turn down."


Lily had packed up her desk and gone home to spend the rest of the day searching for a new job. She had had some luck and was interested in a few positions, but unfortunately the most promising one was in Manchester. Or maybe that was fortunate, seeing the current state of every part of her life.

She had already managed to organise an interview with the Manchester option, and was on her way to the station in a taxi. The traffic was gridlocked in the city and her taxi was at a complete stop. She wasn't too worried as she had left herself plenty of time to get there, but she was dead bored in the backseat.

A loud rap on the window startled her, and she looked out to find James had pulled up beside the car on a motorbike. Or more accurately, Sirius was driving and he was riding in the side cart. Lily wound the window down.

"What are you doing here?"

"Can you get out so we can talk?"

Lily was angry at him, and his refusal to answer her question wasn't helping the matter. She grumbled to herself as she slid across the backseat and opened the passenger side door. They were in the middle of a busy street, and he wanted to talk. She rolled her eyes at the ridiculousness of it all.

"Is this true?" he asked her, and he was holding a copy of the latest issue of Poise.

Lily's eyes widened in surprise. She had not expected him to read it at all, and so she had poured her heart into that article.

"Is it, or were you just trying to sell magazines?" he pressed.

She sighed. "I meant every word."

"Are you running away?" he gestured to the cab.

"I have a job interview in Manchester. It's the only place that I can really write about what I want," Lily tried to explain.

"Nah, I don't believe that. I think you're running away."

"You know what, save your mind games for your next bet," Lily said, walking back to the taxi and opening the door.

"Bullshit."

Lily's heart leapt at the memory of them at his parent's place, and she hated him for using it against her.

"What did you say to me?"

Lily turned to face him, and James walked towards her with that grin on his face.

"You heard me," he said.

He was inches away from her face now. His grin was infectious and Lily had to smile back at him.

"You calling my bluff?"

"You bet," he said.

His hand cupped her cheek and the other was wrapped tightly around her waist. Lily stood on her toes to reach his lips and they when they met her heart soared through the moon.