Disclaimer: I don't own Keroro Gunso/Sgt. Frog. All rights belong to Mine Yoshizaki


It was a fairly abnormal day for the Garuru Platoon. Normally they'd be miles away from home, delivering supplies to the battlefield or destroying enemy bases. Today, however, Garuru was about to go to a meeting with a not-quite-top-secret military think tank called the GKSCAC (Grand Keron Supreme Commander's Advice Committee). They deal with the inner workings of the army, suggest some strategies, and think of campaigns to maintain the army's public image. Garuru was only inducted a couple of months ago. By then he had recruited two of the first semi-official Keronian soldiers in one hundred (Keronian) years: the dynamic spy duo of Karara and Chiroro!

It was eight minutes before the meeting would start, and Garuru was about to open the door and enter the room when he turned to his platoon-mates. He said, "Guys… and girls, I'm not sure about this meeting. Last time I knocked someone's coffee onto his lap, and had to leave early because people were cracking jokes about me. A few days ago I got in trouble with a friend for wearing shoes in a temple. And the leader of the GKSCAC criticized me for tampering with evidence to save the Keroro Platoon. You sure I'd survive?"

"Oh, you're goin' to be fine. Everyone knows that you're a good soldier. More accountable than Keroro. And it's only your second meeting." That voice was Pururu, the resident medic of the Garuru Platoon. "Also, who's the leader of the Big GK?"

"His name is top secret to outsiders, and I haven't learned it yet anyway. We're supposed to call him by some alias like "Mizmo" or "Corwick" or "Tarwas Mahíl" or whatever. Anyhoo, we need to wrap up the conversation. My meeting starts in five minutes. Thanks for the encouragement, Pururu-chan"

"No problem" she said. 'Did he just call me Pururu-chan?' she thought.

And so, Garuru went to the meeting. He sat next to Bariri, who soon realize who he was near and talked. "Hey Garuru, how's my lady?"

"Your lady?"

"You know, Pururu?"

"Eh, she's okay."

"Okay. Hey, look, it's the leader!"

"You don't know his name, either?"

"Which name do you mean? The real one or the-"

The leader tapped his staff on the floor a few times, to get everyone's attention. "Evening, members of the Grand Keron Supreme Commander's Advice Committee. I am Major General Mephrazdil. My real name is only accessible to the higher members of the committee, so the new members shall have to wait for it." He was glaring at Bariri, meanly, as some members snickered. Garuru winced, even though nobody was looking at him. This was another reason Garuru dreaded the meeting: the GKSCAC was quite hierarchical, and acted like it. Garuru and Bariri were in the small Silver Group reserved for new members; it was the lowest group, and it took a year to get into the larger Gold Group, if you were lucky. There was also the Platinum Group, which was smaller than the previous two groups but more powerful, and the Diamond Group was smaller and more powerful still. Garuru hated this system because he effectively only had half a vote compared to other groups, and he was worried about taking the rest of the platoon to the meeting: he reasoned that the Platinum and Diamond Groups could get away with physically abusing non-members in this room. So, Garuru just kept it all to himself.

And so the Major General of unknown name resumed: "I am here to discuss the Keroro Platoon. No doubt you have heard of them. They're the platoon that used to have a TV show called the Keroro Platoon War Chronicle, that just got a low-budget remake. Anyway, you might remember that they're effectively not in the Keron Army anymore, since they've made zero progress on Pekopon and may not even be interested in taking it over, much less for Keron. And that we had to send in that Shin Keroro creature that is also not making much progress despite being a living weapon. Therefore, I've been talking with the Supreme Commander himself on this, and I'll tell it to you Garuru…"

Now, Garuru was sweating as if to ward off a hungry space husky! "Oh no! They know just what Sgt. Keroro's devolved into! Major General Mezzedino- or was it Murray?- knows what I've been up to. I thought I had this in the bag!" He gulped and barely let out "Yes?"

"We are planning on having your platoon go to Pekopon and visit Keroro. Your mission, should you choose to accept it, is to deliver the final blow to the Keroro Platoon. We want you to defeat the Keroro Platoon, install yourself as the leader, and get the invasion really rolling. Take over the platoon and you'll have far less trouble with us. Kill him and you'll become a Platinum Member immediately. Do you accept?"

Garuru just sat there sweating. "What do I do? I don't want to beat up Keroro! But who knows what this group will do to me if I don't accept the mission?" He thought and thought. He then decided "No, I can't do this! You know my brother's there. I can't bludgeon those boys! They'll never forgive me."

"Very well then. Everyone else, raise your hand if you him to enact this plan."

An overwhelming majority raised their hands. "Dang." Garuru thought; "I'm done-for! Keroro and brother are even more done for! I hate this Committee so much."

Major General Whatshisname turned to Garuru; "Sorry, Garuru. You now have no choice but to comply with our plan. To really prove your might, you shall now have to also wear Keroro's star. He doesn't deserve it anymore. You have one week after entering Pekopon's atmosphere. Got it?"

"Y-y-yes, Major General!" Garuru stammered.

The meeting was over. Garuru stepped out the door, looking glum. Then he started crying. The rest of his platoon overheard what was going on. They were shocked at the GKSCAC for their decision. They were all Keroro Platoon sympathizers. How are they going to live with themselves, turning on their friends? This was also one of the few times the platoon saw Garuru crying; he wasn't a very emotional person, or at least he wasn't in front of them.

Pururu tried to hug Garuru, and asked "Are you alright?"

Garuru still sobbed. "Why did I have to get into the GK etc.? Why did I have to go through this? Why?"

"Try not to cry, Garuru. I'm sure we'll think of something to save Keroro. I'm trying hard myself."

"Thanks." Garuru was happier. But the thoughts still nagged him; he couldn't figure out how to stay on good terms with his old friends