Silent questions
by Caz
Disclaimer is in force, so bugger off.
Rated K+
Deep within my soul, within my heart, I can hear you, whispering my name, silently answering the ache inside me, keeping me calm, keeping me aware of where I am and who I am and what we are. Pretend lovers.
When you are near you can sense my desire as I sense the steady throb of yours and it sweeps through my body leaving me awash with longing and it's heady with its strength. It is powerful, it's strong, and it's eternally there.
For both of us.
I dream of you beneath me and upon me, surrounding me both physically and surrealistically. But most of all, I dream of you at home, inside of me and I reluctantly climb out of the dreams drenched with desire time and time again with my arms always silently reaching out for you. But I only end up clutching at my own intimate scented air as it surrounds me instead.
And it hurts, so much, to love a dream.
As I remember you, I am remembering me. I'd been so very naive that first time that you taken my body. I'd heard about love and of the force that it takes to hold you within it's arms, but then I had never been touched by it. I had never felt the magic.
That was until you came along. That was until you stormed into my life, caught my eye, my heart and my fantasies and you showed me what love, ~real~ love, really was.
It was better than my wildest imagination. Better than my most secretive dreams, the ones where you strip me down, inside and out and show me what you can do to me and I begin to burn with need. Invisible hands tracing paths along my body. Your hot breath, pouring from your mouth as you tell me what you want. What you need. What you are going to take.
And your body, Gibbs, long, hard and lean fitting against mine like it belongs no place else, moving with a rhythm matched only by your tongue as you plunge in and out...in and out... in and out...
Oh God, here I go again.
I want to feel that way again. I want to feel you.
~You~ Gibbs.
Not the dreams, nor the fantasies, and not my own careless hands trying desperately to re-enact yours. I need to feel the tender sweep of your fingertips gliding over my skin, searching out my secret places as your lips set fire to my heart.
I need to lose myself in your blue eyes as you hover above me, waiting, waiting until that perfect moment when our souls connect, our indecisions melt, our lips touch and our bodies finally give into the importance of what is about to be as we surge into one being.
I need it.
I need you, Gibbs.
I can't keep concealing my hunger from you, it's slowly killing me. Just knowing what we could be together for real is like dying every time I think of us together.
We have so much to give to each other, more than what I can visualize. Better than what I can visualize. So why do I hesitate in telling you what I want? And I do want you, Gibbs.
Almost as much as I know that you want me.
And I know you do.
I sometimes see you watching me and I see us, together. I know you're struggling against what could be. Are you scared, Gibbs. Of me? Of us?
But why?
We were meant to touch and feel. We were meant to love and make love, with each other. Why don't we, Gibbs?
Why don't we?
