Kaneki. Kaneki was the one thing on his mind right now. Tsukiyama knew that after all the harm he had caused him he had no right to even love him. He didn't care though he wanted Kaneki safe, he wanted to show him that he had changed, to show him that he loved him and would do anything for him. No matter if Kaneki returned his feelings or not.
He was no longer the food obsessed idiot who spent his time engrossed into finding a 'perfect' meal, or the man that had once tried to kill his first ghoul friend just to able to devour him. He had never been able to distinguish his feelings and had no idea that what he felt wasn't lust to eat Kaneki but actual attachment.
And so he followed him with little to no hesitation.
But when Kaneki had told him that he felt an attraction to him he was ecstatic.
So much that he felt he could faint.
This was Kaneki, the half ghoul who he had tried to kill and eat, he had fooled him into think that they had friends at first and then had crushed his hopes by taking him to the Restaurant.
But he was there telling him that he liked him.
In the moment he had picked him up and kissed him making sure not to drop him.
After he had put him down Kaneki looked frazzled red faced and hair even messier than usual. With in the next couple of months their relationship progressed and when they first had sex Tsukiyama thought he had actually died and gone to heaven.
He never thought that he could ever have this kind of relationship as most ghouls knew about his reputation and how he would most likely watch you die if it get getting a delicious meal and he just did did not think that a relationship between him and a human would work.
He was in bliss, Kaneki had shown him the stars in their own room.
He had caressed him told him how much he loved him, and was tender with him. But he had wanted more and soon Kaneki was like a wild beast pounding into Tsukiyama as he gasped and moaned eagerly at Kaneki strides as he his spot many times over.
It was all just bliss for him
And when Kaneki had left him on that rooftop crying begging him not to leave afraid that he would die he felt himself break. Had collapsed into a sniveling mess. That was how Kanae had found him hair disheveled clothes a gross disgusting mess and starving. He hadn't cared he just wanted kaneki back. Now that he was drugged up and unstable he always thought of Kaneki. How he wasn't strong enough to stop him leaving. How he wasn't able to fight by his side. How he wasn't able to keep their small family together. He blamed himself for all of it and now all he could do was wish he was stronger all the while breaking even more under the effects of the drugs that were being fed into him.
