Author's Note:
Just a little moment I thought of one day as I was going to sleep. It became a headcanon of mine. It's set just after the episode where Lelouch kills his parents. This is when Lelouch would have come up with the whole Zero Requiem plan and asked Suzaku to help him. This fic is set just after(or maybe the tail end of it I guess) the conversation the three of them would have had (Lelouch, Suzaku and C.C.) in regards to the Zero Requiem. It's mainly a Lelouch x C.C. moment. (Aside: I always use italics for three things: flashbacks, emphasis, or thoughts.) Hope you enjoy. =)
Disclaimer: I of course do not own or am affiliated with Code Geass or its producers in any way. This is purely a fanbased work.
They were on still on the Sword of Akasha. The once golden sky was shattered and in its place a large grey sphere surrounded the ruined platform. All three of them were present, and they faced each other in a triangular formation. C.C. was sitting, hugging he knees to her chest while looking up at the other two. Lelouch and Suzaku were standing, staring at each other. Or a better description would have been that they were glaring at each other. They stood like two wolves facing off, hackles raised in aggression. Lelouch held himself stiffly with his head held high, back straight and shoulders squared. Suzaku was poised tensely, muscles coiled and his gloved hand gripping his sword's hilt tightly, ready to attack.
"So that is your plan? The 'Zero Requiem'?" Suzaku asked coldly.
"Yes. And will you help me?" Lelouch questioned in return, his voice mirroring the hard edge of the Knight's own words.
Suzaku never lost eye contact with the man. He searched his face as if hoping to find answers, but Zero's expression revealed nothing. Suzaku grimaced as he said, "I can't see it in myself to forgive you. After all you've done."
"I'm not asking you to."
"Why should I trust you?" Suzaku asked suspiciously. "How do I know this isn't just some ruse? Some elaborate plan to corner me? You have manipulated so many people. You've betrayed everyone!"
"Because...This is what Nunnally and Euphy both wanted. A gentler, kinder world," Lelouch answered, his expression never changing from its cold, hard appearance.
The Knightmare pilot didn't respond immediately. He continued to scowl, though his eyes seemed distant, his mind deep in thought. At last, his words holding a sense of finality, Suzaku made his decision.
"I'll do it." Emerald eyes darted up to meet Lelouch's crimson gaze as he paused. The once gentle eyes held no warmth now as he regarded Lelouch. "For Shirley, Nunnally, Euphy, and all the others that lost their lives, not for you. I'll agree to help you end your life. This will be your sentence. This Requiem will be the atonement for our sins."
Lelouch didn't respond and Suzaku didn't wait for an answer. There was no need for words to be exchanged between the old friends turned into enemies by fate. The Knight of Seven spun on his heel and stalked away, the tails of his coat swishing behind him as he did. He retreated down the steps extending off the platform in search of solitude. Most likely to gather strength from his late princess to face the upcoming events. Lelouch stared after Suzaku as he left.
C.C. had remained silent throughout the duration of the entire conversation. She had been startled, horrified even as Lelouch had explained what he intended to do, but any protests she had remained unuttered. Kill himself? But how could he do this? And Suzaku is even going to help him...
C.C. was studying Lelouch as he stood there, lost in one of the deep recesses of his brilliant mind. The witch peered up at him. Her golden eyes absorbed the sight of his sharp features, crafted into an unreadable mask. Though he was yet to be accustomed to his crimson gaze, she noted the bright light in his once deep amethyst eyes. She could almost visibly see the gears in his head turning, processing thoughts at a speed and in a way she would never be able to understand. Each line of his lean frame etched itself in her memory. She could even detect the slight ever present tension in his shoulders. The tension she knew would cause stiff knots to form that he would attempt to alleviate later but to no avail due to the constant pressure of his double life. And she watched the rhythmic rise and fall of his chest as he breathed in and out, in and out. It was the only sign he was alive, rather than an expertly carved statue. He continued to breathe, for now.
The man had just told her he would soon be wiped from existence. His features would no longer be able to even craft that mask, nor transform into the brilliant smile she knew all too well. The light in those once violet eyes would fade; the gears would stop whirring. The tension in his body would no longer be from stress or habit but from rigor mortis. And his chest would remain still; no breath would escape those lips any longer. He would be gone, forever. As she watched him, drinking in every trait and even the slightest movement, she felt her heart aching. Lelouch had just told her this is how it would be, but she couldn't bear the thought of his death. I have to stop him.
"Lelouch," C.C. said quietly, drawing his attention. He turned, focusing his now Geass encompassed eyes on the speaker. "You really plan to do this?"
"Yes," he answered firmly.
"But you can't."
"And why can't I?" His voice darkened and his brows seemed to tense in slight annoyance at being challenged.
"Isn't it mad? One wrong move and it will all be for nothing. If you die before you see it through, it will all be for nothing. All those lives would be wasted in vain," she tried to reason with him.
"I'm aware. I won't make any mistakes," he stated simply.
"What about the end result? At the end of it all you're just..." Going to be dead. She hesitated. Going to commit suicide. "Isn't there another way?"
"There are other ways, yes, but none are worth the sacrifice. Nothing else will yield the same result. The others will backfire." He seemed sure of himself.
"You don't even know what's waiting for you. What will happen to you. Even I don't know that. You might just cease to exist. Or most likely be absorbed into C's world. Become a part of it. Some consciousness, the remnants of you just stuck there in nothingness. You really want that? To die?" Her eyes were pleading with him.
"This is what I deserve," he responded stoically.
"What you deserve...You truly believe that don't you?"
"Yes, I do. I have killed a lot of people C.C., and hurt many more. Why wouldn't I deserve this?" He fixed her with his unwavering gaze.
"You were doing it all for Nunnally. For her future and for her happiness. And haven't you saved a lot of people too? You saved countless lives." You saved me. "Doesn't that count for anything?"
"It still doesn't erase my actions and decisions. None of it erases what I have done. Those who kill should be prepared to be killed. This is what I deserve." His expression remained unchanged
"And you're going to do this all alone? You're going to push everyone away to protect them and then just sacrifice yourself? And then to top it off you will just let them all despise you?"
"That's right."
She was about to retort again. C.C. opened her mouth but no words or sounds formed. Only silence. It was his expression that halted her. It was the expression of a man who had resigned himself, resolute and unmovable. She had seen it on people before. She had seen that look on his own face before. Nothing she said would change his mind or alter his decision. He was too prideful, too stubborn, too confident, too...honourable. This was his plan and no one would stop him, not even her. Seeing that expression made her believe even Nunnally would be unable to stop him, even if she pleaded desperately. There was only one thing left for her to do. She relented.
C.C. closed her mouth and said no more. She simply pulled her legs closer to her chest and wrapped her arms more tightly around them. He gazed down at her and the slightest hint of sadness entered his eyes, knowing full well she had yielded.
Neither of them spoke for some time until Lelouch finally asked, "What about you? What are you going to do? Will you leave?"
She didn't respond at first. She merely stared off into the distance. "I don't know."
He gave her a lingering look for a long moment before turning his back on her to stare off at the walls of the massive sphere, far out in front of him. Only a sliver of his face was visible.
He crossed his arms, firmly stating, "You should leave. It would be better for you that way." Lelouch paused and when she didn't respond or interject he continued, "You could go off to live somewhere. Do what you want. Be happy. Or...if you still wish to you could find someone else to make a contract with. But one way or another you should leave. The longer you stay the more it will hurt in the end."
"That's probably true." He is right. The longer I stay the more painful it will be. But then why can't I say the words? Why can't I just pack everything up and leave? I have done it before. It's the logical choice. His voice cut into her thoughts.
"I didn't say it before. I was caught up in everything, but...it's good to have you back. It wasn't the same without you. I...missed you."
C.C.'s eyes widened marginally. She looked at the back of his head for a moment before she rested her chin on her knees and stared at her feet. C.C. remained silent.
"If this is goodbye I guess I should say it...I meant what I said back then...When I promised that I would make you smile. I meant it. You deserve that." He hesitated but then he firmly said, "Yes, you do. You deserve to smile. You should." He paused again. "That's precisely why you should leave."
"I'll stay."
He whirled around to face her again, his arms dropping to his sides. "What?!" His expression was stunned.
"I'll stay."
"You're not bound by a contract anymore. You don't need to stay."
"You're right but this way you can keep your promise and make me smile. Even if it's just for a little while." She shifted her golden gaze up to meet the once amethyst eyes.
"C.C..." He looked at her sadly as a mixture of sorrow and shock bled into his voice, lacing it with emotional undertones.
"And I made a promise didn't I? I said I would stay with you...to the very end."
His voice steeled over once again as he tried to reason with the green-haired woman. His face turned rigid. "You had no way of knowing what was going to happen. You shouldn't stay because of a petty promise you made me."
"I know. But it wasn't petty." C.C. met his gaze. Her voice matched the sternness of his own. "And that isn't why I'm staying. I choose to because I desire to do so. I want to. It's my decision."
Lelouch's expression retained its hard edge. He gave her one last lingering look and a small nod before silently turned away again. His face once again was no longer visible. The only view she had was of his stiff, unyielding back.
C.C.'s expression then softened once more as he relented, her features relaxing and her eyes warming. She uncurled herself from her sitting position. Slowly, she stood up and approached Lelouch, the heels of her ivory and gold boots clicking softly on the stone beneath her, sending echoes out to break the quiet. Once she stood next to him she gently enfolded his gloved hand in her two pale ones.
Lelouch didn't speak. He didn't even spare her a glance. His only response was to tightly grip her hand in his, firmly but gently bringing her just a little closer.
Gold irises flicked up to his face. He was staring far ahead at the patterned wall. His gaze was set and his face was hard. The dull grey light illuminated his handsome features. Nothing betrayed any emotion...except for his eyes. Unshed tears were formed there, tears, which she knew, he would not allow to fall. Because of those tears and his hand gripping hers, she knew. This was his silent thanks, his silent promise.
She turned her gaze away from his face and directed it ahead of her. The immortal joined him in looking out at the grey dome with its fluctuating, softly glowing, iridescent patterns. Sighing softly, she tilted her head to rest it on Lelouch's shoulder.
They stood like that for a long time. Side by side, gazing out from the ruins to the vast expanse of the dome before them, deep in thought. The figures were like two statues, two sentinels keeping watch. Totally motionless, and in complete silence.
Authour's Note: And done. I ship it. =) I hope you liked it. Let me know if you did in a review. Reviews are appreciated, and of course simply reading is as well whether or not you choose to review. There's no pressure. And I hope you all have a lovely day
